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Some call it intuition. Others call it a "gut feeling." No matter the label, we all have an internal GPS that guides us. But what happens when our GPS is recalibrated to someone else's objectives? This recalibration is the result of a verbally abusive relationship. The abuser will work their magic to undo our self-trust and put that trust into their hands. When this happens, we feel as though there is no place to turn, and the minute we get lost, the recalibration begins.
My relationship with sex after trauma hasn't been a good one. You see, when I was sixteen, I got drunk at a concert. On the train ride home, I drifted off. When I woke up, a stranger's hand was in my underwear. I pushed his hand away and he sped into the next train car. My reaction was a feeling of shame; I blamed myself for sexual assault. I shouldn't have gotten drunk, I shouldn't have worn a skirt, I should have been more responsible. With the support of my parents, I eventually reported the incident, but the shame remained. 
Bad mental health days hurt, in no small part because they make me feel so alone. It's hard for me to ask for help, but I'm trying to get better at it because it turns out, having some support can make a world of difference on bad mental health days.
Some people say I'm negative about bipolar disorder. Some people say that calling my bipolar disorder a chronic illness and anticipating the awful effects of bipolar disorder to come is negative. I disagree. I feel that I'm realistic about my own bipolar disorder. Being negative about bipolar disorder is different. 
The stigma surrounding drug addiction can be just as pervasive as drug addiction itself. It's important to realize that spreading drug addiction stigma doesn't address the overall issue of drug addiction or to people recovering from the illness.
Twenty-five years ago, in the summer of 1994, I was 15 years old. I was experiencing my first taste of schizoaffective depression. It was nothing compared to depression I’d experience later in life, and I didn’t even realize there was a schizoaffective aspect to it. But I knew something wasn’t right.
One of the worst things about being verbally abused by parents is that the damage can be lifelong, yet it can take a lifetime for someone to recognize the pattern of abuse they experienced.
My name is Jennifer Carnevale, but you can call me Jenn with two Ns and I’m the new author of Verbal Abuse in Relationships. I’m a high school English teacher, writer, traveler, tattoo enthusiast, and podcaster. Most importantly, I’m a recovering addict--10 years clean. My drug addiction began at 17 years old after a routine tonsillectomy when I was given a large bottle of a liquid opioid. The medication sent me into a downward spiral through anxiety, abuse, assault, and more. But after a decade of self-work, I am presented with this opportunity to share my stories on HealthyPlace. I get to help others leave the dangerous situations I was in and steer people away from the tell-tale signs and symptoms of verbal abuse. Gratitude is flowing from my heart.
Constructive criticism and depression: Many of us with depression tend to be sensitive and may find it difficult to accept constructive criticism. There are times, however, when we need to hear some constructive feedback from people who love us and have our best interests in mind.
There are five types of fear I associate with psychosis. Although, since my diagnosis 15 years ago, I have often been told that my illness doesn't define me, it's hard to separate myself from the types of fear psychosis brings out in me. Having schizoaffective disorder has had a huge impact on how I see and feel about the world around me, particularly when experiencing psychosis. My psychosis primarily consists of auditory and visual hallucinations which are sometimes terrifying. Experiencing hallucinations has felt differently pre- and post-diagnosis. Here are five different types of fear I've felt with psychosis. Good or bad, these fears have been an important part of my life story.

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Jenn Carnevale
Hi Charlotte, I apologize, but I am unable to contact people via email due to Healthy Place policy. If you leave a comment here, I will do my best to respond. If you are in need of immediate help, check out our resources page: https://www.healthyplace.com/other-info/resources/mental-health-hotline-numbers-and-referral-resources
Be well-Jenn
Natasha Tracy
Hi Naomi,

You're certainly welcome to that perspective but the reason why mental illness (any type) is an _illness_ isn't because someone "made it up" (the symptoms of bipolar disorder have been in medical textbooks since the beginning of medicine), it's because it dramatically adversely affects the lives of those who have it. For example, people with untreated bipolar disorder lose jobs, loved ones, become addicted to drugs, die by suicide and so on. That is the work of an illness, a disability.

I can't comment on shamen, what I can comment on is the millions of people who have been helped by bipolar disorder treatment. These people have an illness and these people have been helped to lead happier, functional lives again.

- Natasha Tracy
Gwendolyn
I truly feel your pain I am going through something very similar and it's so hard cause like you I suffer from social anxiety ,,,I lost my life partner years ago and she was the very first one since then I let into my world and my heart and I loved taking care of her and pampering and spoiling her I am a lesbian out and proud and I think she has deep feelings as well but to afraid to let go and take a chance I have been consistent in my actions and anything she's ever wanted or needed I have backed completely with no questions asked I've even told her she was my best friend she was my calm to my storm and when my anxiety is through the roof she is the only one that can talk me away from the ledge she said I was the same way towards her that nobody gets her like I do I have been very patient very caring and kind truly accepting of her unconditionally and then on this roller coaster mood swing ride with her ups and downs highs and lows for four years now and recently out of the blue she text me and said I was no better than a man that she was angry that I cut her off and not doing anything for her anymore that she was going to go her way and I needed to go mine then she waited text me again 2 minutes later and said she was seeing someone so now since we work together she ghost me every time and it hurts it's like everything we shared and done and experience together is gone erased never existed she is friendly with everybody else at work but if looks could kill when she sees me I would be dead ten times over I have not done anything so that's where I'm at now hurt lost and very confused part of me wants to walk away the other part cares too much and needs to stay because she suffers from bipolar so when I read your article I really really can relate with how you feeling at this time doesn't get any better will she try to reach out and reconnect like you I'm just confused so thank you for sharing your painful story with everybody it makes me feel I'm not alone
Naomi Bel
Historically, they were called SHAMAN. It's the same symptoms. They were spiritual healers. It is a disorder when psychiatrists made it up. They persecute them because for the most part psychiatrists are psychopaths and sociopaths. Being bipolar is not a disorder. It is the way the emotions of a Shaman fluctuate in a society full of abuse and abusers. If you are like this, you can learn to control it and only receive the good parts of it. Remember for decades Psychiatrists would 'cure' people by giving them a lobotomy- most obvious indicator for them being psychopaths and sociopaths. Psychopaths and Sociopaths use the opposite parts of their brains as people that are bipolar, so since they already developed into their perspective, they can't be happy and need to feed off the self-esteem of others because they lack the ability to feel good by themselves. So, they enjoy telling people that being bipolar is a disability. The symptoms are: being happy, creative and energetic. Does that seem like a disorder? Its the biggest lie. Maybe some Psychiatrists don't know, so don't judge them all- but be assured, its not any type of disability. We're healers.
charlottehorsham
could you email please so i can ask for help thanks x

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