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Take a moment to think of your favorite media villain. Got it? I bet the character that just came to mind is portrayed as having a mental illness with a sprinkle, or more like a heap of dramatization for theatrical effect. Batman’s Two-Face struggles deeply from poorly represented dissociative identity disorder (DID), as does Split’s premise with the twenty-third identity of protagonist Kevin being “The Beast”, an entirely fictitious representation that--intentionally or not--paints individuals suffering from DID as violent and inhuman.¹ The cinematic tactic aimed at creating drama and bolstering a storyline comes with an unintended and paramount side effect: stigma.
When I operate within the framework of a eating disorder, my life orbits around fear. I am afraid of consuming three balanced meals. I am afraid of not being able to squeeze in enough exercise. I am afraid of the number staring back at me on a scale. I am afraid of seeing the calorie count on a nutrition label. I am even afraid of existing inside my own skin. Yet these are superficial fears—they influence the eating disorder behaviors, but they are nothing more than smokescreen curtains to distract me from the actual source of those external behaviors: my deepest core fear. The reason an eating disorder took control over my life in the first place was not because of an aversion to food. It was the result of something more complex and painful to identify. As a teenager, I had no terminology for this. But now as an adult, I know that naming the fear is vital for my healing.   
There was a time in my life when I could not imagine myself meditating and taking the time to stop everything I was doing. During that phase of my life, I overcompensated my underlying anxiety by keeping myself busy with tasks. Every second of the day was filled with completing tasks. Sitting still was not part of my daily schedule, and I certainly did not try to keep my mind free and clear of thoughts. 
I don’t have many friends who live nearby. Part of the reason is that my schizoaffective anxiety makes me feel awkward around new people and at parties. Part of it is because many of my old friends moved to other parts of the country and a few of them died due to complications with mental illness. But part of it is because I cut a lot of people out of my life. Here's why I cut people out of my life.
Opening up about self-injury can be incredibly cathartic and healing. But it's important, too, to set and maintain healthy boundaries during self-harm recovery and beyond.
I had a discussion with my friend once about brain fog, and I said brain fog wasn't a real symptom of depression; it was just sort of a layperson's description of cognitive difficulties. Brain fog itself wasn't exactly real, per se; I said I wasn't exactly wrong about that, but I wasn't exactly right either. Brain fog is not exactly a medical descriptor, but I identify with it as a part of my illness(es). I can now attest to the fact that brain fog is real.
Letting go of what I can't control has always been challenging for me. In my work as an actor, this is a necessary skill that I'm just now working on. As I get better at it, I realize just how important it is to apply it to all aspects of my life. Let's talk about it.
Since the age of 18, I have lost four passports. This sportsman-like proficiency in losing valuable documents is partly a result of having attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).
Over the years, I have been able to cope with my anxiety much more effectively than I did when I was younger; however, there are still plenty of times where my anxiety has affected my self-worth.
People who have borderline personality disorder (BPD) have a reputation for being difficult to treat in therapy. As someone who has BPD, I can attest to this: I can be very defensive, and I have a habit of trying to do the therapist's job by diagnosing myself and telling them what I think I need. I also don't stick with any therapist for long and have been known to bail with almost no warning.

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Natasha Tracy
Hi Bobby,

I'm not sure what you mean by that.

-- Natasha Tracy
Elizabeth Caudy
Dear Shanique, Thank you for your comment. It sounds like you have a lot on your plate. I am so glad you know God loves you and that you get peace from Him, and that you are blessed with loving and supportive family and friends. It sounds like you are very strong. Best, Elizabeth
Katie McMurray
I am a boarder line woman who’s splitting destroyed an innocent person… I know I should feel something but all I have is contempt for this person I used to praise and thank came into my life in every way. I’ve never hurt a person like this before I don’t feel anything god what is wrong with me… I know I have a soul but why can’t I feel emotions like normal people do! Why do I make everyone who loves me into my abusive parents and friends… I don’t want to be an evil person who ruins lives and just takes takes takes and if anyone doesn’t go along with it tries to punish, I want to be a person of substance and value not a leach… the problem is we just don’t feel emotions correctly and confuse things with past triggers because of our trauma. Most of us avoid it all costs, I myself have been in therapy and make mental health problems my whole life and talk about them with strangers to cover how low functioning I am and never have to face my real trauma which was sexual in nature from a close family member, I never face it or let anyone in really we live in fear of little things our friends or people might find out and not like us… it’s a sad way to live I had a severe eating disorder andr stuff led for years before I met my ex, he gave me confidants strength and so many laughs and made me feel safe, I left him with a note and never looked at him again ever after living together through scary times and only having each other for so long… I used his past to say I felt threatened and when he wouldn’t stop whining I threatened him with a restraining order … he never responded but a month later saved pictures to shared album so I got one anyway… just to never have to hear it… we really don’t care how we hurt or use people.. I know I don’t speak to all boarder line people but around half of us are also diagnosed NPD and the majority of us will never be diagnosed or refuse the one we get and just find counsel from people who tell us what we want to hear to feel ok for living a life of lies and emotional abuse… it’s all we know.. like I said it’s not a great way to live so don’t pity us or waste effort hating us, we create our own hell and live it everyday
Shanique
I also have schizoaffective disorder. I am a Christian and pray as well. It helps me alot knowing that God loves me and give me peace. When I am struggling, sometimes it's difficult for me to pray but when I do it reduces my symptoms. I do not attend church often because it triggers the auditory hallucinations, which are Reglious voices, so I choose to worship at home. I also on medications but I do not go to counseling because it not affordable. I work a full-time job and I am a single parent. I have a loving family and supportive friends. I have two friends that has mental illness, one that has schizophrenia.