I've been thinking about my process and realized that while I may be able to identify low self-esteem, that doesn't mean everyone can. Today, I'd like to take a different approach to identifying low self-esteem. I'll write this post from my viewpoint as I figure out my self-esteem.

I have permission to enjoy food. As obvious as this sounds, it's one of the most impactful realizations I've come to learn in eating disorder recovery. In the darkest seasons of my illness, I believed that showing a preference for any food at all was a sign of weakness. I would not allow myself to acknowledge pleasure in the flavors and textures of anything I ate. Food was purely utilitarian back then—I consumed just enough to stay alive and placate the concerns of those around me. But the more I heal, the more I learn that food is a source of nourishment and enjoyment. So I can grant myself permission to experience both.    

Last summer, my boyfriend and I enjoyed celebrating our birthdays and the Fourth of July together for the first time. But after our relationship ended in late July, I felt like a mess. Every holiday and milestone since then was very difficult for me. Now that nearly a year has passed since the breakup, I have learned how to continue life single. Here are five coping methods that have helped me.

When I have racing thoughts, feel overwhelmed, and feel like things are out of control, it becomes a major struggle to feel a sense of calm. Calmness becomes difficult to achieve, at least at the moment, because it’s so hard to quiet all of the worries, racing thoughts, and resulting symptoms that accompany anxiety, especially when you experience a panic attack. And so what I’ve found is that this will lead me to behaviors that will pull me away from being over-stimulated.

In my experience, attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) creates strong impulsivity. That means buying unnecessary items, diving into uncertain situations without proper consideration, and being a poor conversationalist.

Each summer, I am greeted by a familiar experience. I shake my routines and try to squeeze in being outside and seeing people I haven't seen in a while. Summer draws out my restless, ambitious side. I've realized in previous summers that this frenzy of activity affects the routine that keeps me in recovery from binge eating disorder (BED). This summer, I am reminding myself what I need to do to savor the summer months while not engaging in eating disorder behavior.

Saying goodbye is never easy, but it is crucial because everything ends. After writing for three years for Work and Bipolar or Depression, my journey has taken a bittersweet turn. This is my last post about work and depression, and I want to express my gratitude to team HealthyPlace and my readers. 

When I first began experiencing the onset of depression, I was confused and terrified. Although vague and patchy, at the time, I did have a basic understanding of how the disease typically presents itself in individuals. I was adamant that what I felt was not synonymous with someone who is depressed. The emotions I was experiencing didn’t align with the accounts of other individuals who have experienced depression. Not only was I confused and terrified, but I also felt like an outcast in the community that theoretically should have provided me with solace.

Verbal abuse can rear its ugly head anywhere to anyone, including children in a school setting. Unfortunately, it can be more than a child's peers who use name-calling or teasing to get the attention they want. In some situations, the trusted adults in the classroom who receive payment to guide our children and help them learn are the ones throwing around insults and demeaning kids. 

Writing has always been a healthy outlet for me to process and express my feelings. I have been writing since I was a young girl, and it has helped me through some of the darkest periods in my life. Throughout my time writing for HealthyPlace, I have had some incredible personal breakthroughs and have been able to connect with many others who battle similar demons. However, my path has taken me in a different direction, and I am saying a final goodbye to my readers within the "Debunking Addiction" blog.