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It's no secret that depression can affect your behavior -- that it can cause you to do and say things you wouldn't ever otherwise do or say. But when should you hold yourself accountable for bad behavior? And to what extent does mental illness excuse bad behavior? What kind of allowances should we expect in times of poor mental health, and what kind of allowances should we be prepared to grant to others? When is depression simply not an excuse?
In a recent post, I discussed why I like wearing comfortable clothes to manage anxiety and what, specifically, comfort means to me in that context. In this post, I want to do something similar, only this time I’m discussing furniture as opposed to clothing. Again, ensuring one’s furniture is comfortable is a pretty self-evident thing to do, but like my recent post, I want to go into a bit more detail with regards to what that means to me.
Why am I, a queer woman of mostly European descent, talking about the movement to decolonize body image? The answer is simple: because it matters—therefore, it must be talked about. In the United States, November is recognized as National Native American Heritage Month, which makes this as ideal a time as any to further the conversation.
Memes are pretty much a staple of the Internet. I’m sure even those who carefully curate their social media feeds have memes scattered about in posts from those they follow. As funny and relatable as they can be, what role do they have in stigmatizing mental health?
When I had my first child, there were not as many work-from-home options. With the global pandemic, more people have flexible work arrangements. I've had several work arrangements with my children. I've been a stay-at-home mom, a working mom, and a work-from-home mom. There are advantages and disadvantages to each. But regardless of your work situation, each one can present its own unique challenges if you have postpartum depression (PPD). You're going to have bad days, no matter what you do. The question is, how do you set yourself up for good mental health by managing PPD at work and home in spite of those bad days?
I used to dread the holidays because of my schizoaffective anxiety. This year, however, I’m looking forward to them. Here’s why.
Recovering from verbal abuse can be a challenging journey, even if the abuse is in your past. For myself, even decades after I distanced myself from those who are verbally abusive, I can become triggered by others who may not be intentionally abusive, but I interpret it as so.
Many people in recovery wonder, can you get a job with self-harm scars, or will your past always cast a shadow over your future? The truth is, while you can't erase the past, that doesn't mean you have to let it hold you back.
One of the things I enjoy doing in my free time is watching cooking and recipe videos online. As I don't have any professional training, I tend to seek out videos of simple recipes that don't require any obscure ingredients to make.
Confession: I'm hesitant to use the "trigger" label at this juncture in my eating disorder (ED) recovery. To be clear, though, as someone who has been part of formalized treatment communities for the past 10 years, I understand why it's useful—or even a source of comfort—to be conscious of triggers in the earliest stages of recovery.

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Liana M. Scott
Hi Cheryl. It's good to know that there are others who experience EMDR treatment the same way. Thanks for sharing your comment.
Cheryl Wozny
Yes! I have the same intense exhaustion after an EMDR treatment. My therapist always says that I should not plan for activities or tasks after my session and to take it easy the rest of the day. Completely normal.
Terry Cliffe
I came to look at your well written extensive work here on the internet to discover the difference between depression and self pity. I don't think one is separate to the other personally. For me self pity is a judgmental phrase used by people who don't understand others who are suffering a the beginnings of a depressed state of mind, mild or severe and has no real definition "Feeling sorry for yourself" linked "to pull yourself together" only adds to the isolation that is created around a person who is suffering unless they have learnt a process to pull themselves together or the person who is judging them knows. Your links into explaining the Victim mode helps the understanding of how we get there. You might find the "drama triangle" an addition to your work. Terry C
D S
I haven’t gone a single day without a song in my head for as long as I can remember (30 years?). And I tell you, when you go into a room to have a meeting and you have ‘Who Let the Dogs Out’ stuck in your head, where it has been for hours, it is frustrating and suuuuuuper difficult to concentrate.
I do have some songs that help melt some of the loudest songs to a more dull roar that I will try to particularly put in my head. But it switches too fast. Like a child fiddling with a radio.
And it isnt just songs, it is words and phrases with no tune, like words like “archipelago” or “vernacular” or “haberdashery”.
My family doctor had no idea. My psychiatrist was the first to mention ‘auditory hallucinations’ but I am not so sure that is correct.
I have tried so many methods to get rid of the songs, like the shout it out variation. But activities like that usually push my mania, (which is already pushing at the seams with the songs)over the edge.
I can’t focus on reading, I can’t meditate because my brain is having a dance party which just pushes me on edge and diving for my playlist to put on something different.
Alice
Hi,
I self harmed for a few weeks, ending a fortnight ago. I’m OK with seeing my scars (I don’t get triggered and I’m not inclined to do it again) and my parents know about them, but I still feel apprehensive about letting them see the scars and talking to them about it. However, I’m going on a swim camp soon, and need to sort something out (like long swim pants or something). How do I start that conversation?