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There is this whole notion that simply by saying the words, “I’m bipolar” you’re somehow overidentifying with bipolar disorder. In other words, you’re allowing the disease to define who you are. Well, naturally, I find this to be ludicrous and I don’t need to play word games in order to individuate myself as a person.
Nevertheless, I admit that bipolar is a huge part of my life and I make no apologies for that. If you were sick every moment of your life it would have quite an impact on you too.
When it comes to the statistics about domestic abuse, it doesn't matter to me how many men to how many women experience domestic violence. Domestic violence is a power issue more than a gender issue. Intimate Partner Violence affects men and women, and I really do not care in what proportion.
Domestic violence will not end until
no person seeks power over another person, or
every person learns to recognize the tactics of control and manipulation early in a relationship so they can make the decision to get out before the abuser hurts them (more).
I do not see the day when no person seeks power over another. I believe the majority of people want and work for equitable relationships, but I also believe there will always be those who do not. I think the desire for power over another person is a temptation all of us battle with at times. Some of us win that battle, and some of us lose ourselves in it.
Facing my addiction to alcohol will involve a great deal of facing my past. Like my borderline personality disorder (BPD), my alcoholism did not develop overnight and a large part of the problem lies in past trauma. Just as my BPD will impact my treatment, so will the root of the problem: my past.
Yesterday I was thinking about the nature of addiction on a road trip I was on. The drive served to provide me with a few thoughts I’d like to share.
In order to combat something, one first must learn everything one can know about the subject at hand. Meaning, if we are to fight stigma, we need to know why it exists, what motivates its spread and what purpose it serves for those who endorse it.
Recovery from an eating disorder offers many gifts.
Health. Restored relationships with family and friends. New life. Freedom.
And it's true. Eating disorder recovery does mean all of these things, and more.
But that's not the gift I'm talking about.
This gift is much more subtle and may seem to be a curse at first.
There is a type of denial of mental illness that goes beyond mere psychological denial – this is called anosognosia and it is the clinical term for the lack of insight required to understand you have a mental illness. Anosognosia is a neurological disorder thought to be caused by abnormalities in the frontal lobes (Impaired Awareness of Illness (Anosognosia): A Major Problem for Individuals with Bipolar Disorder).
Christie Stewart
In my previous blog, I shared lots of tips on what not to say and do when talking to loved one about self injury for the first time. In this video, I expand on the subject and offer advice about things you should do, as well as some tips on how reach out and offer self-injury help and support in a healthy way.
Here's the funny thing about the PTSD experience: Uncomfortable emotions become so familiar you don't even notice that you have them!
For example, in my own recovery, it wasn't until the anxiety disappeared that I realized I'd been living in such a state of high anxiety. Why is that??
I can think of a handful of things that have caused me trauma in my life, but being diagnosed with a chronic mental illness, bipolar disorder, is at the top of the charts. Those of us who live with a mental illness understand trauma on a deep level. We experienced trauma before our diagnosis, once finding out, and when working to become well again.
My point being, I'm right there with you. I hate the rollercoaster. I just want to live life without being in a state of constant fight or flight mode, only for his character to change and de-escalate and I fall for the person I fell for all over again.
Exhausting is a horrible word. The understatement of all understatements, if you will.
I wish there were better support groups for this kind of mental health condition.