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Do you have trouble getting out of bed and sometimes end up staying in bed all day? You're not alone. People with mental illness, those experiencing depression in particular, often have this problem. But no one wants to stay in bed all day. It doesn't help anyone, it doesn't shorten one's overwhelming to-do list, and it doesn't help you feel better, either. So, let's look at techniques to ensure you don't stay in bed all day.
Navigating my life with you, my reader has been a privilege; however, this post will be my last. Anyone following my blog knows that my life has been anything but stable. It’s funny; I started writing here to help the borderline personality disorder (BPD) community by sharing my past experiences. I ended up sharing the challenges I was currently facing.
I believe trauma is often a repercussion of eating disorder treatment. Of course, clinical interventions are helpful, beneficial, and even crucial parts of healing, but they can still be traumatic nonetheless. This might sound like an oxymoron, so let me explain the possible trauma of treatment.
Paranoid schizophrenia affects my diet. I have a complicated relationship with food, and thinking something looks good or sounds good is not enough to get me to try it. The reasons are that my most persistent symptom besides anxiety is paranoia and my paranoia frequently involves food.
The holiday season seems to put pressure on indulging in big meals and celebrating with people you haven't seen in a while. These holiday traditions also disrupt one's routine, which is helpful to have in recovery. The pressure and disruption of the holiday season can cause elevated stress and discomfort around food, especially if you are in binge eating disorder (BED) recovery.
At this time of the year, I usually look forward to the holidays. But there are some years when my holiday spirit seems nonexistent. So far this holiday season, my anxiety and depression have been getting worse. Here are some ways I noticed that I am struggling with my mental health and what I plan on doing about it this month.
I know how important authentic feelings are to recognize. I'm feeling a little blue. Sorrier words have never inaugurated a blog post, I'm sure, but I'm not here to impress you, I'm here to be authentic, to share authentic feelings. What's authentic right now is that it's just one of those days.
Let’s face it: setbacks aren’t fun, and they can feel especially un-fun when they’re mental health recovery setbacks. Building resilience in mental health recovery can help with that. Resilience sounds like such a big thing, but all it means is the ability to bounce back from difficulties.
As I work through my healing journey, I've noticed some specific triggering elements that leave me feeling uncomfortable. Even as a young child growing up, I remember the emotions of mistrust and suspicion when trying to determine if someone's words and actions were genuine. My trust issues from child abuse made it almost impossible to tell the difference between a lie and a joke.
Seasonal depression is a hot topic during this time of year, and seasonal depression and stigma rear their ugly head simultaneously. It wasn't until recently that I could put a name to all the unpleasant and lonely emotions that I felt as the days became shorter and the weather colder--I guess I can thank mainstream media for that. The fact of the matter is that many individuals experience varying degrees of seasonal depression. So why do people still attempt to debunk the phenomenon and call seasonal affective disorder fake? Stigma around seasonal depression, that's why.
Once a year or so, things will get better and suddenly my mood lifts. However, I’ll soon make another mistake and go right back to my long term severe depression. Thus, it is clear to me that I don’t have a chemical imbalance or some sort of mental disorder. Instead, my depression is completely explainable. I’m a lonely screw up despite decades of effort. These circumstances would make anyone suicidal. I made major attempts three times. At age 20 I had a major anxiety attack the day before my junior year. I went in the woods near my house with a pistol. I held it to my head but eventually chickened out. I convinced myself that things were would get better. Deep, deep
down inside I knew they wouldn’t and that was the case. Most recently I’ve found a large rock outcropping at the exit I take for the gym. I wish
I wasn’t so afraid. I feel regret every day that I didn’t go through with it at 20. So much pain.
Every other suicidal person I’ve met has flawed thinking and can get back on track. In my case, however, my thinking is clear: I am a friendless screwup. The evidence is there plain as day.
Thank you for your comment. I'm so sorry for what you've been through. I wish I could say something to make it feel better, but I suspect that's impossible.
What I can say is that you're right to hope. There is always the possibility of positive change. Getting help -- new help, additional help, etc. -- can be very hard and even disheartening at times, but it can also work, too.
I'm sending you some warm fuzzies. I know how hard it is, but the fact that you're still here speaks to your strength.
-- Natasha Tracy