Blogs
Many days I don't want to get out to bed.
I am dealing with some difficult life issues right now, and of course the first thing I turn to is restricting my food intake in order to numb the pain and anxiety I am feeling.
There are some days that I feel as if this will go on forever. I contemplate my future and I can't see the light at the end of the eating disorder tunnel.
If you've been hanging out in the mental health corners of the web for longer than about a day, you've probably seen it - mental illness bashing. Mental illness, mental health, psychopharmacology, doctor, therapy and other-related-topics bashing.
It's extremely common and extremely hurtful and destructive. But it's the wild and woolly web, and that sort of nastiness happens in the jungle. Here are some tips for not letting other people's nastiness get to you.
I remember the day I met my friend, Sharon.* Bob had turned four the month prior, and I was--for the third time since then--preschool shopping.
Sharon was the owner/director of a small, private Montessori preschool (which I fell in love with almost immediately). She was confident, secure, and highly knowledgeable when it came to children. She had two of her own, in fact, and they were honor roll students and star athletes. In other words, she was everything I felt I wasn't. And she intimidated the Hell out of me.
Believe it or not, you truly can control your ADHD impulses and avoid being arrested for breaking and entering. All it takes is a few good thumps from the School of Hard Knocks to drive the lesson home, but even an air-headed dreamer such as myself can learn to avoid catastrophic lapses of impulse control.
How important is it to have motivation in addiction recovery? Addiction recovery is hard, and on rough days, where cravings or urges are high, it is important to separate the disorder's voice from the authentic/wise mind voice. On days where you are struggling in sobriety or mental health recovery, it is crucial to have intentions, motivations and goals to shift the perspective to help you through the struggles. It is important to realize the journey is all about the work, and every moment you are fighting for recovery matters.
Recovering from a serious mental illness can seem impossible, insurmountable at times, and frightening as well. Because I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder at the age of twelve, drugs and alcohol became a way in which I worked to forget about the diagnosis and self-medicate it.
This week I’m going to get a little more personal.
This past weekend I attended a business development workshop. Every six weeks or so I bravely head off for these two day intensives, knowing that at the end I will have gained some great ideas to apply in my work and also that I will be somewhat changed as a person when I leave. This past weekend was no different as I was reminded that once again, I am my own worst enemy.
Monday morning, my phone rang. I recognized the number as Bob's school. With a groan, I tapped the "ignore" button on my phone and waited for them to leave a message, hoping it was just the cafeteria manager letting me know (for the 98th time) Bob's lunch account is in the red.
No such luck.
“All statements on the Internet are true, including this one.” Taz Mopula
Here is a riddle to enjoy. You are walking on a road leading to Basingstoke. You arrive at a junction. The road splits in two. You do not know which road to take. There are two men standing there. You know that one man always lies while the other always tells the truth; but you don’t know which is which. You are only allowed one question to find the right road. You can ask the question to either man.
What question will you ask to find out which is the road leading to Basingstoke?
I love my readers for so many reasons, but one of them is that they leave intelligent and interesting comments on my posts. This one caught my eye:
. . . in my experience anytime you challenge a p-doc they try to attribute it to a symptom such as paranoia or delusions of grandeur. So my question is how to talk back to a doctor when you don't agree with him if you are as knowledgeable as you obviously are without that happening or is it a lost cause?
(Ever think a doctor has delusions of grandeur? Just saying...)
I do not think it's a lost cause. I talk to my doctor like a colleague all the time, but it is tricky.
My point being, I'm right there with you. I hate the rollercoaster. I just want to live life without being in a state of constant fight or flight mode, only for his character to change and de-escalate and I fall for the person I fell for all over again.
Exhausting is a horrible word. The understatement of all understatements, if you will.
I wish there were better support groups for this kind of mental health condition.