Blogs
Self-Care. Mental health depends on it, but self-care can be something of a confronting word. As if implying I developed a mental illness because I didn't take responsibility for my mental health issues. That may sound like a stretch, but when my therapist says self-care in a tone that says "I can't believe you don't know how take care of yourself!", I feel a little guilty anyway.
The verbal abuse excuses I used as glue to hold my marriage together were lies that kept everyone happy. But one day the verbal abuse excuses revealed themselves as lies (see Verbal Abuse Examples), and I realized that the excuses had twisted my perspective on communication, love and integrity. Soon after that, I left my abusive marriage.
Developing anorexia nervosa in my early forties still feels a bit surreal. As I begin to recover and regain health, I am looking for answers that might not ever be found. Why would a woman with no previous history of any eating disorder suddenly fall into the hole of anorexia starting at the age of 41?
Like Alice in Wonderland, I have been moving through the strange world of anorexia perplexed by my very presence here. The questions continue to hammer at my brain.
Anxiety can stop me from trying new things. Lately I've been okay except when I go to try something different. Then it's all systems panic, followed up with a few days of fatigue and uncertainty. Some of this anxiety is about keeping me in my safety zone. A part of my brain figures that if I stay right there, nothing too terrible can happen. Then that annoyingly rational part chimes in to tell me that A. it pretty much already has, and B. staying in my safety zone won't treat anxiety, or PTSD.
I've had a horrible, terrible, awful, no-good, very bad week. Suffice to say it's winter, I hate snow, I feel like I could drink a lake and still be dehydrated, and situations beyond my control at work and at home are driving me to childish behavior.
And Bob? Well, after Tuesday's camera debacle, he's done rather well. I received an email from his teacher yesterday, telling me what a fantastic day he'd had. Even though he wasn't at all thrilled with carrying his stuff to school in a $1 Joann's reusable shopping bag, he didn't protest too much when I advised him he would be using it for the remainder of the week, regardless.
Due to my frequent flirtations with treatment-resistance over the years, I have discussed ECT with a variety of doctors. To the first doctor, and the one after, I said simply, “I would rather die than do that”. Well, as it turns out when faced with death, you’ll do a lot of things you didn’t think you would.
There are several ways to make your abuser feel like you do and get some sweet revenge. It is possible for your abuser to feel unloved, controlled and disrespected. It's relatively easy to get some revenge on your abuser by irritating your abusive relationship. Try these tips and see if you can’t elicit the hostility your abuser holds under the surface of his otherwise calm demeanor. You too can get revenge on your abuser by making him feel like you do.
I was on the radio recently as a guest of Dr. Stan Frager on WGTK, and he asked about depression or bipolar disorder disclosure to an employer. Although many people think they are familiar with bipolar disorder these days due to the attention it has received in the media, by and large they have the wrong idea about it. Mental health stigma on the news and in the media show mental illness to be something it usually is not. So my answer to whether you should disclose bipolar disorder to your employer has to be...
While most of us would like to think of ourselves as flexible, adaptable beings, the reality is that the mere thought of even a necessary change makes the best of us want to run and hide. Most people are creatures of habit and slight changes to our regular routines can turn us into stressed out, crabby people. But as Roseanne Cash, singer/songwriter and daughter of Johnny Cash, says, “The key to change...is to let go of fear.”
Like millions of other Americans, I don't get enough exercise. I’m more keenly aware of that fact in the month of January, when every gym and athletic goods store ramps up their advertising efforts to take advantage of the New Year fitness fever. But that doesn’t mean I’ll do anything about it. Ultimately, it’s just not that important to me. For some people, the opposite is true – exercise is one of the most important things to them. Does that mean they have an exercise addiction? How do you know if you're over-exercising?
I also have DID. And I know that it is not safe for people or animals to live with me. This is just the facts and it’s devastating. I know that to be ethical and non-harming I have to live alone. To see me, I look kind and sweet. And parts of me are. But not all the parts. I’ve been officially diagnosed and in therapy over two years, and even if we all heal, I don’t think it’s worth the risk that I could hurt or kill somebody. Some risks can be taken, but I don’t think I could say, ‘hey- let’s move in together. By the way I had violent tendencies but I think I have it taken care of. You ok with that?’