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Borderline personality disorder (BPD) and relationships can pose some unique challenges. The constant fear of rejection looms around every corner, making it difficult to fully embrace the positive moments that relationships bring. Even when surrounded by love and support, the fear of impending abandonment can act as a barrier, preventing the full enjoyment of the positive aspects of a relationship. This struggle underscores the complexity of managing BPD within the context of interpersonal connections.
As my time writing for HealthyPlace ends, it presents the perfect opportunity to reflect on the past 12 months and prepare for what lies ahead. Before I leave, I would like to share what I have learned about myself while writing this blog and how it has reinforced my motivation to keep moving forward.
Sharing gambling addiction recovery stories really matters. As much as we discuss gambling and addiction, the picture that’s painted is that of hopelessness. Granted, the thrill and hope of a big win have a dangerous grip that leads people down the path of compulsive gambling, but it is the stories of hope and triumph that give people with addiction the hope they need to overcome the struggle.
With verbal abuse, avoidance may be present with the abuser, the target, or both, depending on the situation. This tactic has two sides that can be helpful or harmful based on the contributing factors. Avoidance in verbal abuse is common.
It's the holidays again, and I've found that this is a good time of year to not only say thanks but actively practice gratitude to help my anxiety. I've learned that gratitude can be a very powerful emotion and can actually help reduce stress and lessen the symptoms of anxiety that I experience.
Some people with bipolar seem like they're so angry. Sometimes, I'm one of those people. I don't take this feeling out on other people, but that doesn't mean I don't feel the anger intensely. Let's discuss why bipolar makes me so angry.
There are a lot of new words and concepts out there to describe one's gender identity or sexual orientation, and one of them is bigender. As our community continues to expand and evolve, we develop new language to describe our experiences and identities. You might not have heard of the term bigender before, and trust me, even as a queer person, it can be hard for me to keep up with all the identity words. Today, I want to talk about what bigender means. As a bigender person, I hope you find this helpful.
Survivor's guilt is real. Nowadays, when I open the Instagram app on my phone, I usually see content of a similar nature: graphic images and videos of dead or seriously injured Palestinians. Often, the people in these posts are babies and children, and it is heartbreaking to see the plight of these innocent, young souls. This post is not about siding with Palestine or Israel, but it is about the survivor's guilt that many of us around the world are experiencing today. Let's take a look.
Journaling can be an exceptional tool for managing mental health, and I've found creative journaling tips that have helped me reframe what it means to journal. When hearing the word "journaling," I used to think of "dear diary" entries, but now I believe there are many journaling tactics that are useful in combatting anxiety, depression, and guilt and gauging mental illness recovery progress. I'm excited to share some creative ways I've used journaling tips to assist in managing my mental health.
My eating disorder lessons actually make me feel grateful. Gratitude is a recurring theme that defines the entire holiday season. In fact, this value is thrown around so often in the frenetic build-up to each new year that it's easy to overlook just how powerful gratitude is. When I strip away all those cliché axioms and intentionally reflect on what it means to be thankful, I'm humbled by the sheer amount of blessings in my life. But then, as I lean deeper into self-reflection, I feel a curious swell of gratitude in an area I would normally least expect. This year, I am grateful for the lessons of my eating disorder.
Well, eventually, the depression demons took hold and he told me on August 5th 2023 that he decided he wanted to just move to MT and isolate himself from everyone. He had been offered a free place to stay if he did some maintenance. He is very handy and that type of situation was very ideal because it was flexible; he only worked on things on the days he was physically up to it.
We talked every night like "normal" up until he left on April 14th 2023. We had a long distance relationship then and so I didnt get to see him in person often and didnt see him that last week. He told me one last time that he loved me and he was sorry to hurt me and I have not heard from him since. He didnt even tell his parents or sister he was leaving.
I still love him as much as I ever have even though it has been over a year since we last spoke. I just had dinner with a close friend who was always very critical of him because often he would have to cancel plans last minute due to the Crohn's or because he would go dark for weeks at a time. She told me tonight that he is a selfish person and that if he truly loved me he would have gotten help for the depression. Oddly, she has been depressed before and suicidal which you would think would make her more understanding. I asked her if when she contiplated suicide was she selfish? She said yes. I said but are you a selfish person and she said no. I said that was the same for him. Sure him leaving me and his family was "selfish" but at his core, is he selfish? Absolutely not. She thinks because she was able to conquer her depression that if he really loved me, he would have fought his depression. It makes me sad to think she cant see the amazing guy that is buried under the depression. I know, without a doubt, if he did get a handle on the depression, that he would NOT be selfish at all. It is hard to understand why others cant see the true person under the depression.
I hope those that are struggling know that not everyone will abandon you in your time of suffering. There are people out there that see the real you and would do anything to help.
I encourage all those suffering from depression to not only tell your loved ones what you are going through, but also to seek professional help. And for those of you who love a person suffering from depression, have compassion and understanding for their struggle. Know they do not intentionally hurt you and deep down they still love you even if they cant show it.
Thanks for reading.
p.s. I also struggle with depression and anxiety but I did get help and between medication and coping techniques, I am able to be myself again.
From the story you told, it sounds like you know when your partner's alters switch.
I'm sorry this was written in the first/second person. But maybe apply this to your situation with a grain of salt.