When your child has a psychiatric illness, your plate fills rather quickly--psychiatrist appointments, therapist appointments, IEP meetings, trips to the pharmacy and the never-ending juggling of prescription medications. But there are other things crowding the china--things like medication side effects--we may have no idea how to handle, even if we feel we've "mastered" all there is to know about our child's diagnosis. Children with mental illness experience myriad side effects that create even more problems for them and their parents; one in particular has hit us the hardest. In our house, the most persistent medication side effect is bedwetting. And it's driving us all crazy.

(Continued from Part 1 and Part 2) I suppose for the past five years, I've been living in my little suburban cave, sheltered by Bob's elementary school and our middle-class neighborhood. I hadn't realized just how great a gap exists within our school district, or how many children like Bob are getting trapped in that gap.

(continued from Part 1) I spent Tuesday afternoon with a delightful group of first-graders, at a school more like Bob's--middle-class, mostly native English-speakers. This class had only one Bob--a little girl I'll call "Bonnie"--but that wasn't the only contrast from Tuesday.

Yesterday, I arrived at school for my teaching assignment. Before the first bell, three staff members had already offered their assistance and described my class of sixteen 2nd-graders as "awful." On my first day of substitute teaching, I had been handed a room full of manic, unmedicated Bobs.

Two weeks. Two weeks ago, Bob's psychiatrist switched up his medication cocktail for bipolar disorder (his ADHD medication remains the same). And...my Bob is back.

Making time for yourself, although not easy, makes all the difference when parenting a child with a psychiatric illness.

Last week, we returned to Bob's psychiatrist to discuss the medications he takes for bipolar disorder and ADHD. Over the past year, his medication regimen (which he has taken for over two years) has become less and less effective, even as his doses are increased. I was ready to argue my case for a medication change. Luckily, I didn't have to.

I need a job. Our finances favor it. My husband prefers it. My sanity demands it. But will my oldest child's psychiatric illness allow it?

Quarter-end parent/teacher conferences were last week, and after meeting with Bob's teacher and reviewing his report card, I'm convinced an IEP is the right direction to take.

This weekend, Bob turns 10 years old. A momentous occasion, for sure--why haven't I been in the mood to celebrate? Aside from it being tough to get into party-planning a for someone who has acted anything but party-worthy...parties and Bob don't mix.