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I Hate the Mentally Ill – My Ex was Bipolar and She was Evil

I like my job. I get to write for a living which is something many writers don’t get to do. And moreover, I get to write about things that matter to me. Also a great luxury for many writers. These are pleasures as are the vast majority of people I get to meet.

I do have the great displeasure, though, of seeing vehement hatred for those with a mental illness. People who hate show up here, on my blog and elsewhere. People with a hatred for bipolar disorder seem to seek places to express their hatred.

But hatred of the mentally ill is simply another prejudice. Hatred of people with bipolar is the same as racism and just as unacceptable.

People with Bipolar Are Selfish, Whiny, Childish Monsters

No one in their right mind would say, “All [people of race] are selfish, whiny, childish monsters.”

They wouldn’t say that because it isn’t true and it’s outlandish to think, let alone say. People of any race are individuals and thus are all different. Enlightened people understand painting them all with any brush is inaccurate, insulting and quite frankly just plain wrong.

It’s exactly the same for those with a mental illness. Suggesting all people with bipolar are selfish, whiny, childish monsters (and I have heard much worse) is ridiculous. I am none of those things. I’m a grab-bag of traits, much like everyone else. Except I have an illness.

Some people have had bad experiences with the mentally ill. They use this as an excuse to hate everyone with bipolar disorder. This hatred is as bad as racism. Read more.Why do People Hate those with Bipolar?

There is generally one reason why people hate those with a mental illness: they have had bad experiences with them in the past. And for whatever cockamamie reason, they have generalized that experience onto everyone with bipolar disorder. And for some reason they don’t see the ludicrousness of that behavior.

My Ex was Bipolar; She was Evil

Lots of these people have bipolar ex-significant others. And some hate their ex-others. Perhaps for good reason; I couldn’t say. But here’s the thing:

  1. You fell in love with that person at some point and married/had kids with/lived with them, so there really is something good there somewhere.
  2. People hate their ex-others. It has nothing to do with bipolar and everything to do with being an ex.

People also think “men are bad,” because of a bad divorce, or “women are conniving,” or what have you. Not because of anything intrinsic to the gender but because divorces/breakups are nasty, ill-fated, legally acrimonious affairs.

Unfortunately, when one party has a mental illness the other party often feels perfectly justified in dumping the ills of the world at the feet of the illness. And then at the feet of everyone else with the illness.

Your Bipolar Ex Might Have Been Evil

I have no idea who you were married to, and they may have been the worst person on the planet. In fact, their illness may have made their life and yours a living hell. That person may have needed help and refused it. That person may have done horrible things and blamed it on their disease. That person may have hurt those and those you love. Quite possible.

But that’s not about being bipolar, that’s about the individual.

I will accept this illness makes people unpredictable and challenging, like many illnesses. I will accept the fact being with a person with an illness (any illness) is hard. I will accept that we hurt people, and sometimes that hurt has to do with bipolar disorder.

I will not, however, accept any insult you want to throw at me simply because I have the same diagnosis as a person you know. I will not allow you to tell me how I am or who I am. I will not accept your prejudice and I will not accept your hatred.

Enjoy Your Hate

You can hate whomever you like. It’s a free country. But do it in front of me at your own risk. I do not buy your nonsense and to me, you are no better than a racist. Go find another place to play. Because I won’t let you unabashedly hurt others just because you have been hurt.

You can find Natasha Tracy on Facebook or GooglePlus or @Natasha_Tracy on Twitter.

Author: Natasha Tracy

Natasha Tracy is a renowned speaker, award-winning advocate and author of Lost Marbles: Insights into My Life with Depression & Bipolar.

Find Natasha Tracy on her blog, Bipolar Burble, Twitter, Google+ and Facebook.

157 thoughts on “I Hate the Mentally Ill – My Ex was Bipolar and She was Evil”

  1. I’m bipolar. I’m a male. I’m 6’3″. I’m trilingual. I guess I’m smart – that’s what I think at least. I had an amazing childhood in terms of standard of living. Probably top 1% in the world for sure. Then something went wrong when I was 12… Lost the mansion, family has to work abroad… bankruptcy. So for the first 12 years of my life I was living similarly to Trumps kids(top 1%), I guess. Worst thing that happened to me was being bullied at school most likely because I was sent something from Stanford by the time I was age 10. Well living now in maybe top 5% in the world, a little down the food chain, but still graduated from High School, same place that Mr. Bezos did. Early admission 2nd month into senior semestar so I guess I had 6 months of… waiting. Then my life could FINALLY BEGIN at 18!!! NO MORE BOSSES!!! Didn’t do well so I went home, tried and tried again to learn from people that knew so little… couldn’t do it, didn’t have the patience.
    I always loved numbers. The most simplistic science that us humans created. Think of life like luck… Some people are lucky, some people aren’t. Bipolar people are extremely unlucky (replace bipolar with race samesex preference / anything not part of the norm/etc). Thanks for reading. –P.G.

    P.S. We all have our place. Without bipolar people I guess Lilly and Pfizer maybe would have fed pills to people that cure cancer from Philip Reynolds.

    P.P.S. Last one, I promise. I believe we were made for the pursuit of happiness. My gf believes we are here to suffer. And I’m the bipolar one…

  2. I recently left my bipolar fiance. It was the best choice I’ve ever made for myself. I almost forgot what it was like to be happy. This man utterly destroyed me. It makes me so angry when bipolars [complain] about the stigma they face when it’s there for a good reason. Go to any bipolar support forum and you will see that it’s filled with people who are coping with a bipolar’s abuse. Get involved with someone with this illness and you will become nothing more than their chew toy. Bipolar people are clueless to the pain they cause.

    Go ahead, accuse me of being bitter and judgmental. It will only make me smile. The bipolar stigma is there for a good reason <3

    1. @Tanadia – Good for YOU! You have saved yourself and your future children YEARS OF HEARTACHE. Trust me – bipolar is forever and the whole “everything will be okay with the right meds” is pretty much a joke. Glad to see that you have moved on – you are worth more than years of abuse at the hands of someone who will hide behind the bipolar label. I wish you the best in moving on and strongly urge you to never look back.

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