A Verbal Abuse Quiz You Want To Take, Just To Be Sure

March 30, 2015 Kellie Jo Holly

A verbal abuse quiz can do a lot of things. It can help you determine if you suffer from verbal abuse. It can change your mind about what verbal abuse is and is not. A verbal abuse quiz can even show you that (eek!) you abuse other people. But a quiz cannot make you be honest. So if you are not ready to take an honest look at your situation, then don't bother with this verbal abuse quiz. It can't help you if you lie.

A Verbal Abuse Quiz Challenge For You

People love quizzes so much that we'll take a quiz to find out what kind of cat we would be, answering the questions quickly with complete confidence. No panicking, no over-thinking, no trying to please someone else. But when it comes to the serious stuff, like a verbal abuse quiz, we might semi-consciously skew the results by answering dishonestly. We might say we don't have the symptoms of verbal abuse, when in fact, we do.

Don't feel bad. We come by our dishonest answers honestly. We lie or fudge the truth because we want the answer to reflect what we want to know, not what we suspect to be true. After all, who wants to be an abuse victim? Who wants to find out someone we love abuses us? No one. So we give the benefit of the doubt to someone else - the one doing the abusing - instead of to ourselves and our feelings.

Take this verbal abuse quiz without thinking too much and find out if your relationship problems are really abuse problems.I challenge you to take this verbal abuse quiz with the same honesty as you would take a silly cat quiz. Don't over think your answers. Don't make excuses for the someone you suspect abuses you. Don't answer the questions with the answers someone else would like to hear. Take this abuse quiz as if you were trying to determine what kind of cat you would be instead of whether or not you are an abuse victim.

The Verbal Abuse Quiz

Going forward, the word someone implies one person in your life. Get that particular someone in mind before taking this verbal abuse quiz.

  1. Do you ever laugh at jokes about you that actually make you want to cry or fight? Do you hear jokes that hurt you in front of other people who laugh at the joke? Do you hear someone routinely say something like, "It's only a joke, honey" and then understand that statement as their hint to say no more?
  2. Do you feel your pulse beating faster when someone throws a temper tantrum? Do you forget what was so important about the conversation because someone's angry behavior derailed you from your point? Can you predict with great accuracy when someone is about to explode in a fearsome rage? Do you change your tact to avoid someone's temper?
  3. When someone accuses you of wrongdoing, do you automatically defend yourself no matter how silly the accusation? When someone blames you for the outcome of some event, do you feel compelled to defend or explain why it's not your fault? Or apologize even though you can't pinpoint why you feel the urge to apologize?
  4. Do you intend to have a conversation on one topic in particular, then discover later that you did not accomplish your goal? Do you find yourself saying, "Yes, but..." during conversations but never get your words in edgewise?
  5. Do you ever feel frustrated because someone immediately expresses a sentiment or observation opposite of the one you're trying to express? Have you felt frustrated because you know someone said one thing but they insist they said another?
  6. Have you ever felt frustrated because someone tends to forget things that are important to you like appointments, parties with your friends, or plans you made with them just yesterday?

Verbal Abuse Quiz Results

I know you took this verbal abuse quiz because you think your loved one abuses you. I know you are hoping they do not. I hope your answers to the verbal abuse quiz questions above were all "No."

If you answered "Yes" to any of the questions presented above, then you are a victim of Someone's verbal abuse.

Any quiz results are only as good as what you do with them. Take the first step now and become educated about verbal abuse. Check out some in-depth verbal abuse information articles or try the Abuse Screening Test for Women.

APA Reference
Jo, K. (2015, March 30). A Verbal Abuse Quiz You Want To Take, Just To Be Sure, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2024, July 18 from

Author: Kellie Jo Holly

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

October, 8 2017 at 7:26 am

I’m no professional but if it’s gotten bad enough you have considered running away it definatly sounds like your being ‘abused’ you should try talking to a school counselor or friend something that could probably help

Grace M
October, 1 2017 at 8:26 pm

I'm not sure if this is abuse but it's been going on for years and it has almost driven me over the edge. I'm 13 and my parents yell at me and they made me believe that I made life difficult and they didn't take my feelings in account they also threatened to hit me multiple times. Recently my dad has been touching me like his hand on my thigh for a long time or on the lower of my back and yea.. I don't know if this abuse but it made me uncomfortable and extremely scared I think because I wasn't accustomed to that and it was odd and now I'm really scared . What should I do. I'm really scared and sad and confused what do I do? Am I just overthinking this or worrying for no reason ?

August, 30 2017 at 9:52 am

I've been abused in every way. My mother was so ill with cancer that she didn't know. I don't want to get to far, since I worked through it, but friendship? Even after 2decades is what is confusing. Any stories that any of you have been in an abusive friendships?

Aki Duggan
August, 4 2017 at 9:15 am

My name is Aki and I'm a 13 year old girl.
My dad has been emotionally and verbally abusing me as well as neglecting me for as long as I can remember. Around a year ago I was illegally removed from my mom's house and put in my dad's house. Since then the abuse has only gotten worse and worse with each passing day. For example: every time I get hurt or one of my 3 siblings hurts me he laughs and doesn't show any sign of hoping that I feel better. Just like when I got a concussion, my dad laughed at me bcuz i fell out of a tree then he waited for 3 hours to take me to the hospital to get my head checked out and I ended up getting to bed at 1 am. My siblings and I are treated like cleaning ladies/people.......only we don't get paid. My dad's sarcastic remarks about how 'awesome' my report card is(I have horrible grades) and how 'awesome' it is that we accidentally broke something hurtes soooooo much. I have been looking for a way to share my story and show that my dad isn't the best man in the world like he says he social worker from Children's Aid Society and my lawyer don't say anything even closely related to the fact that my dad abuses my siblings and I in court(even though we complain all the time about it). My dad also abused my mom sexually, physically, and emotionally before he left Jan/16th/2011. I recently found out that I have ptsd due to his abuse and neglect. So basically I am left alone with my siblings and my mom to get the stories out.......but it's not working very well bcuz my dad has Children's Aid Society, my lawyer, his lawyer, and my mom's lawyer wrapped around his finger. Oh ya.......and my mom has also been falsely accused of having a mental that helps things. Soooooo ya that's my life now!!!!!

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

Aki Duggan
August, 4 2017 at 9:18 am

I am also super scared that he will start hitting me!!!!!!
WHAT DO I DO!!!!!!I NEED HELP!!!!!!!

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

August, 4 2017 at 9:48 am

Hi Aki,
Thank you for your comment. It must have been hard for you to open up like that so well done.
I'm so sorry to hear about what you're going through. Please, if you think you or your siblings are in danger, call the National Child Abuse hotline right away -- they can help you. Even if your dad hasn't been violent, the fact that you're scared for your physical safety is important.
It won't be like this forever, but you need help from the right people. Good luck xxx

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

October, 8 2017 at 11:09 am

You literally are describing my life. I am also 13. My mum was the same, and everyone always used to make up things like she was crazy and had mental illnesses even though I knew she didn't. But at least she saw the bad in my dad and was always trying to stop him. But no one listened to her. And now she is dead and no one is listening to me, and I haven't got her support anymore. Feeling sooooo lost. Thanks for sharing though, it helps me realise that I'm not the only one.

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

October, 8 2017 at 11:10 am

My dad is the abusive one. Just to be clear.

July, 23 2017 at 3:17 am

I been abused just a few minutes ago thats why im writing this.

Name Witheld
May, 8 2017 at 9:33 pm

So I'm 17 right now. When I was 12, I was having serious issues with a few mental disorders and was EXTREMELY suicidal. I told my parents... and they screamed and laughed at me. My mom went as far as to slam the door on my face when I begged her on my knees to believe me. I can easily answer "yes" to every question asked, not just the numbers, but the questions. This sort of thing went on for 4 years, and since it was during that especially horrible time in my life, it REALLY messed me up. I don't think I was abused, since they say that they love me (most of it has stopped), they don't remember doing any of it, but they remember doing it sometimes, and because they didn't really expect a child who has mental disorders. Also, it may have seemed like I was acting when this all was going on. They say now that I over-exaggerate everything. I'm not sure, because I have memory issues along with my mental issues...
I feel so bad about having issues with this. I feel like I'm the one who's abusive since I keep bringing this up with them and my counselor...

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

June, 11 2017 at 4:21 pm

I am 12 and I feel like I am emotionally abused I have I do complain about somethings my dad just had talk with me and he said if I complain again he will send me away to an all girls boarding school I am really sad and scared and I just can't do life any more it hurts my parents are constantly doing this I am adopted and my parents won't let me see my birth family any more and I miss them I can't do this :(

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

RayAnn Tenberg
June, 24 2017 at 1:24 pm

Yes plz call a helpline at least and stay strong help is out there dont give up XOXO

September, 20 2016 at 4:09 pm

Well start off at beginning. I got married to a Muslim man in 1998. And had my first child. We always seem to get into a fight over finances as we don't make much money. I always feel like the man should get two jobs women have house duties and taking kids to and fro. We any way the first fight we got into was when daughter was two years old. He stood in my face with hand raised ready to hit me but instead he told me he would kill me and daughter and himself. I left him for one week he did not know where I was. He started calling jobs and going by them to see if I was there. No response so he called my mom. He told her he could not find me. I spoke to her letting her know of the threat. Trying to spare daughter I left and went back home. All ok for a bit then he starts callin me a pig. That I have never lost weight while with him. Than time and time agin he had threatened to diborce me. He has also banged holes in walls and knocked over funiture. Thing oh ok for a bit than he threatened to take kids back to his country. Not to long ago a good friend was shot and thin hubby shot him self. I was naturley devastated and extremely sad. Hubby her do and I asked him if found anouher job he said no and went on. On the phone he made comment to go back to his country and retire there. He want to shoot you in back like your friend. He knew that woul hurt. I have not talked two him in !.scared thT he will take kids to his company. Is this abuse. I kind of feel that way.

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

April, 23 2017 at 4:20 pm

Yes! This is very much abuse! Tell someone you trust, and record everything he says and threatens. With that information you can use that to show authorities and if you want a court case. Hope you stay safe!

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

June, 26 2017 at 7:52 pm

Yes, it is abuse and you are being threatened with death. He cannot legally take the children out of the USA without your written permission. Once in his own country, things may be very different. Have you seen the movie Not Without My Daughter? Unfortunately, you may have no legal rights in his country if it follows Islamic law. His attitude seems cultural to many Muslim worldviews that the wife is the husband's property. My sister-in-law was taken to by her dad to her father's home country (Muslim) and her American mother could not get her back through the courts of that country or the American government. Her mother had to steal her daughters back before one was given as a child bride. My sister-in-law says her dad treated her with love, but her older sister was going to married off as a young teenager, and who knows how she would have been treated by the potential husband. These days there are better protections in place for parent kidnappings. Bottom line: your husband is definitely abusive and he is threatening your life. You can get protection from the USA (and most other Western) legal system(s). If I were you, I would believe that he might carry through on his threat to kill you and get protection for yourself and the children.

August, 8 2016 at 5:57 pm

My name is Katie, I'm 12 years old, and I feel like my mother has been doing #1, 2, 3, 4, and 5. An example: I ask if she wants to hang out in the pool with me after I get back from my Dad's house. She says no, and I ask her why. "It will be too cold." It's 95 degrees outside. I ask her to at least try it, because I've been so desperate after our last fight to have fun with her. Her voice quickly changes to a yell, and she tells me to "stop bullying" her into doing things. I ask her why she thinks I'm a bully. She ignores my last statement, going on to tell me how I "always take advantage of her" and I always do this, and I'm such a that. I get defensive immediately. I have a bit of an anger problem. She knows that. I search for reasons I'm not a bully. I can't. I feel like I'm dirt. She walks away, audibly mumbling,"Joyful" sarcastically. She wants me to hear her say that. She wants me to feel horrible. I do. I look at our front door, seriously thinking about running away. I run outside to the porch, and once she can't hear me, I cry. If she does hear me, she'll tell me to be quiet and go to bed. I text my dad for advice. He has depression as well, and he understands me better than my mother. He tells me that running away is not a good option, and I could stay with him whenever I need it. (He also tells me if I'm too sad, I can watch Beavis and Butthead. :)) my dad can make me smile in the worst of times. This time wasn't one of them. It's a daily routine. My mother comes out not to ask me if I'm alright, or if I need a hug, e even to talk about anything, but she can't get the door open, and blames it on me, stating "you were the one who used it last." And "you were the one who broke it." I tried to open it, and it slid right open. So now I'm here searching for verbal abuse signs, still balling. Please, if I could get advice or any answers, please please please please help.

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

April, 23 2017 at 4:27 pm

Sounds like you are experiencing emotional abuse. Talk to a trusted adult like your dad, and tell him you think you are going though emotional abuse. Maybe that way he can take action. BTW, has this been going on since you were little, and does your dad do anything about this, like does he take action? Right now, I would talk to your mom about how you feel, tell her you don't like whats going on and you feel unsafe. If that doesn't work, I think you and your mom should see a therapist. Hope you stay safe!

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

June, 3 2017 at 8:49 pm

You sound so desperate. I have had previous experience with your situation. And you must speak to an adult who will listen and be able to help you. They may have to take drastic steps to help you. But remember it's a means to an end

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

June, 26 2017 at 8:02 pm

Your mom has problems aren't related to you, but she is taking out on you because you are close by. She may not be able to control her own problems because she may have a mental illness or a similar handicap in how she operates. It is not your fault. Even when you have a temper. You can work on your temper, and you should for your future. But your mom has her own issues and they aren't your fault. It is not personal to you, it's about her emotional abilities. Please stay with mom or dad rather than run away. There are much worse people in the world who will be even more harmful to you. Your mom's problems are not because you are a terrible person.

July, 20 2016 at 10:26 am

My mother does this to me, and has been doing it since I was nine. Nowadays I don't even bother to talk to her if I have the choice not to. I believe I may have some sort of Depression thanks to her, but I can't get help, because she'd either yell at me or call me a hypochondriac.

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

Kellie Jo Holly
July, 21 2016 at 11:46 am

I don't know how old you are now or what state you're in, so I don't know if this can work or not. Try to make your own appointment with your doctor and have a friend take you to it. Tell the doctor how you're feeling and what's going on. At the very least, if you're of age, you can get a referral to a therapist and medication that can help with the depression/anxiety.

June, 29 2016 at 7:11 am

My parents do this. It makes me feel like I'm not worth anything. I have tried telling them how I feel, but they either get really angry or they do not take me seriously and laugh at me. I feel really helpless. I don't know what to do because on one hand I love them because they are my parents but on the other hand I hate them for how they make me feel so worthless and depressed and fat/ugly all the time. I just don't know what to change or do so they can finally be happy with me for once, or accept me for who I am. I've tried so much but it is never enough. Anybody any idea of what makes most parents really happy with their child?

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

Kellie Jo Holly
June, 29 2016 at 1:38 pm

Charley, your parents are abusive. I hate to tell you, but I had to tell my son too, there is nothing you can do to make them approve of you. As hard as it is, you must do things that make you proud of yourself - no matter what your parents say. Since you can't change their reactions, you may as well do what you think is right so you can approve of yourself.
When you're 50 or so, sitting by a parent as he or she passes away, you will STILL be waiting for that approval. I don't want you to live your life like that.
I'm sorry your home life is this way. Find your joy in other places - school, activities, friends, friends' families...

June, 17 2016 at 2:32 am

I looked at this and knew all my answers would be yes my "mother" has been doing it to me for as long as I can remember she never did it to my sisters or my brother just me I've always been the kid that ruined her life she's only told me she loved me twice and I'm 27 funny how I had to lend her money each time to hear it after she destroyed me and my credit rating ( took loans out in my name and never paid them ) and she still won't admit it I'm a liar according to her for all of you who's mum is the problem I subjest you drop her cut her out of your life because she will never change she will continue to drag you down so you can never get your head above water then and only then you can start putting it behind you and movin on

May, 29 2016 at 3:57 pm

This maybe strange..but THE verbal abuser is my 28 year old son an his girlfriend whom seems to follow his lead..
I have a grandchild so i put up with it because of fears i wont c was the last an final straw..he calls me a mother many things worse then she says im a white bitch..
It hurts soooo bad..i guess im going to have to sacrafice my any chance forva relationship..he makes me feel like i dont deserve to i luv life

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

Kellie Jo Holly
May, 30 2016 at 10:42 am

I'm sorry to hear that, Jenny. My son went through that when he was younger - I think it's easier to take when they're not adults. I feel bad for you. I wish it were as easy as cutting him out of your life, but there's your granddaughter.
Do your best to limit your time with him and his girlfriend while gaining time with your granddaughter. Maybe you could offer to babysit so they can have a night out each week? You could meet them in a public place, somewhere fun for your granddaughter. Or, if she's an infant, ask a friend to stay with you during drop-off, pick-up. Abusive people are less likely to abuse in front of an audience. I don't know. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

May, 15 2016 at 10:17 pm

I am verbally abused by my partner. I took the wuiz and of course answered yes to most of the questions.
The thing is, it happens, I get all upset and thinking how I can get out, but begore I know it he's really sweet and ccaring, that is till the next time.
I feel ashamed at not managing to leave him.

May, 15 2016 at 10:43 am

Dose fat shaming count as verbal abuse from my mom? How about being called "stupid" from your dad when he gets upset because I could do a task the right way to his liking, or being called "next to nothing" because you couldn't find a pan so your mom can cook dinner on time. And him bring up my ADD implying that I'm stupid. All the mean things my dad has said to me all happened when he was mad.y parents has never hit me but they have spanked me when I was little and my dad still threatens me with the belt and I'm 16.

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

Kellie Jo Holly
May, 18 2016 at 8:44 am

Natalia, yes, they are emotionally and verbally abusive. I'm sorry you've lived with it for so long. You know how some kids dream of leaving home? I suggest you start putting a plan together so you CAN leave home after graduation. Ask some trusted adults for help. Maybe you can spend a weekend here and there out of your home until you get to leave permanently.

December, 17 2015 at 6:19 pm

I am verbally abused by my mother I answered all these questions yes and was hoping it was a no idk what to do or how to stop it but it's slowly tearing away my self image I also know my mother doesn't mean it she always says sorry but she's to stubborn and thinks I'm to stupid to see that she's hurting me and my 4 siblings

August, 25 2015 at 2:41 am

Wow, this subject is so prevalent, there are many people who have written on the topic, especially to Tonya. A woman called Patrica wrote books on the topics that were a good read and someone I know just wrote a book this year which is very helpful the name is catchy 'Time To Go!' Leaving Emotional Abuse.... by Norva Semoy Abiona. There is help out there, I hate that people think it's ok to treat others so horribly. I once had a boyfriend who tried that on me. Well, that was the end of that.

April, 22 2015 at 5:25 pm

I cannot seem to be able to choose any quiz and just sent to a page completely blank yet options to yet again take another quiz. What is the problem?

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

Kellie Jo Holly
April, 27 2015 at 5:17 am

Sweetmalis, I don't know what the problem is with the quizzes.

April, 12 2015 at 9:09 am

I took the quiz,even though I already knew the answer. This is not the first abusive relationship I have been in. But I don't know what to do I have let this one strip me of everything my job self esteem I'm gaining weight I can't hardly function anymore I still have 1 minor child I don't know how to make it out of this one I have list will to fight I have always maintained away to get my children and self out but I let him have complete control

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