I’m sitting here feeling like dreck, and for the millionth time this lifetime I ask myself, “When will I feel better from bipolar depression?” This is such a common question from me and so many others. We all want to know when this magical time will occur. When will the pain stop? When will I stop feeling like such crap? When can I get back to my life? When will I feel better from bipolar depression?
Bipolar Depression Feels Infinite
I have spoken to people who have been depressed for a week and those that have been depressed for a year and they both want to know when they will feel better from bipolar depression because bipolar depression feels infinite when you’re in it. I feel almost like laughing at someone who has been depressed on the order of weeks because that is the blink of an eye for me. That, of course, would not be fair. Bipolar depression can wreak havoc on a person’s life on the order of weeks just like it can once it sits on you for months or more. I know this. And I know that when you’re in the deepest pit of despair it feels like all you’ve ever been is depressed and all you’ll ever be is depressed even when these things clearly aren’t true.
Bipolar Depression Treatment Takes Time to Work
And while you’re in the deepest, blackest most painful pit of your life, you have to take depression medications that can take between 4-6 weeks to work – if, indeed, they end up working at all. So doctors are asking you to stay in your pit for weeks more. And then weeks after that if you have to try a second medication and weeks after that if you have to try a third. It feels interminable.
I Don’t Know When You Will Feel Better from Bipolar Depression
And the fact is, no one knows when I, or anyone, will feel better from bipolar depression, schizophrenia, or any other mental illness. These things happen when they happen. Medications work when they work. I remember one medication that worked within a week. It was miraculous. I have never seen that repeated but I saw it once. I remember one medication that worked well in about that 4-6 week time period too. So does this mean with a new treatment I will feel better within a week or a month? Nope. It doesn’t.
Because every treatment is different and at every point in time you and your bipolar depression is different. Our illnesses are moving targets. What worked once may never work again or in the same way. I’m sorry, that’s just how it goes. I wish I had better news, but I don’t.
How to Improve the Odds of Feeling Better from Bipolar Depression
But the good news about our illnesses ever-changing is that it means that the pit can’t stay as deep and dark and death-filled as it is today forever. It just can’t. We all change. All the time.
So when will I feel better from bipolar depression? I don’t know but I have to have faith that I will. Eventually.
Image by American Advisors Group.