About Alter Switching in Dissociative Identity Disorder
Alter switching and dissociative identity disorder (DID) are interdependent. The term "'switching" means simply to change, but, in reference to DID, it means to change a part, an alter, or a headmate, as they are called. Everyone has parts that comprise his or her personality. You might have remarked before, "Part of me really wants to improve my health." For someone to reference a single part of his or her personality is normal, but for those of us with DID, we experience more extreme parts of ourselves that have their own thoughts, opinions, beliefs, wishes, needs, etc. The switching of these parts is difficult, jarring, and disconcerting. If you have DID or know someone with DID, it is important to understand the signs of when someone with dissociative identity disorder is switching alters and what you can do.
Signs of Alter Switching in Dissociative Identity Disorder
Just as each DID system is different, the way we experience switching can also differ. While not an exhaustive list, below are experiences that might indicate when I am about to, or in the process of, switching alters in DID.
- Hearing a headmate's voice in my head
- My head goes foggy
- I cannot concentrate, process information, or think clearly
- I hear outside voices from afar, as if in a tunnel
- My head feels chaotic
- I can physically feel my facial affect changing and my emotions flooding my facial expression
- My handwriting changes, sometimes from messy and precise or from print to cursive
- I stare blankly at the wall or floors and "feel" myself being moved out of the way
- My eyes change shape and color
- Shivers run through me as though I'm cold
- I feel detached from myself as if someone else is "running the show"
- I have headaches that cannot be relieved with medication
- I feel dizzy and light-headed
- My thoughts get louder
- I do not make eye contact
- I take a deep breath and breath an enormous sigh as if to alleviate building stress
- I look around the room suspiciously as if I'm unaware of my surroundings
- I frequently watch the clocks to account for time lost
What Causes Alter-Switching in Dissociative Identity Disorder?
The causes of dissociative identity disorder alter-switching vary. In my system, I do not have control over when my headmates switch; however, I do know ahead of time what situations might trigger a switch in alters. Triggers include:
- Memories - good or bad
- Anything from the five senses
- Strong, uncomfortable emotions
- Extreme stress
- Certain times of the year
- Looking at old pictures
- An outsider mentioning a headmate's name
- Tremendous anxiety
- Crowded places
This list is a great place to start when thinking ahead to possible instances that might trigger you. Understanding triggers is often a good practice so we can prepare ourselves for what we might need in order to keep us safe.
Dissociative identity disorder alter-switching is always done to keep the system functioning and safe. Everything in the system happens for a reason, even if we do not know what it is. It is usually a defensive response to anything the system deems threatening.
While knowing switching can be a protective act, I usually find the switches disturbing, especially when parts come and go like a revolving door or jockey for front position (Three Reasons Why People with DID Hate Switching). Not feeling in control feels very overwhelming and even embarrassing, regardless if no one knows but me. Embarrassment, frustration, and shame frequently plague our system when switching. However, having frequent internal communication, dialogue, and understanding with my headmates makes the system more amenable to an agreement on terms of when and how headmates switch. Trying to block a headmate is seldom helpful and will most likely cause hostility and anger in the system.
Do Outsiders Know When We Are Alter-Switching in DID?
Most outsiders, including my husband and often times our therapist, do not realize when a switch has taken place. There are some signs, such as altered behaviors, changes in language, uncharacteristic differences in beliefs and thoughts. Usually, if I am angry and cursing, that is a telltale sign an angry headmate is out because her angry behavior is contrary to my behavior. Along with a distinct way of talking, an outsider might know we have switched by our mannerisms and body language.
What to Do After Your Loved One with DID Has Switched Alters
Trying to figure out what to do when your loved one has already switched alters is too late. The headmates will want to feel safe and cared for, so a plan is necessary. The first thing to do before a headmate switches is to have a plan of action already put in place on how the system wants you to respond to a switch. In the plan, find out if questioning the switching headmates is permissible and, especially, if it is allowable to ask the new headmate his or her name.
Do not ask the alter you were with to resurface. Remember, in order to love one headmate means you should love them all because they all work to protect the host. Please do not judge the headmate that has just surfaced, even though he or she might have interrupted an important moment. Always stick to the plan. Do not veer off. Lastly, do not take it personally when one headmate leaves and another switches into place. The switching may have nothing to do with you and arguing with any headmate will not make you an ally.
Lastly, your headmates have been with you the majority of your life. They are there, and in their own way, to protect you. Unless they are a danger to you or others, do not struggle with him or her being out. Be gentle with them. Remember, they saved your life before you could save it on your own.
Please check out the following video to learn about the three types of dissociative identity disorder alter switches that affect my memory.
Hargis, B. (2018, June 14). About Alter Switching in Dissociative Identity Disorder, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2020, March 30 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/dissociativeliving/2018/6/about-alter-switching-in-dissociative-identity-disorder
Author: Becca Hargis
I have a question. Ever since I was 8 years old. I have had terrible anxiety driven impulses to do this horrible thing. I don't ever remember not having them. I don't remember much before 8 years of age. I get in literal fights with my body not to do these things. Like my hand will go to do it and I fight for control not to to it. I feel like I want to and don't want to. How do I know if I want to do those things and don't within myself. Or I don't and an alter does. If all I can ever remember was being this way?
Can someone please help me with this?
I know i may be late but.. is it possible that i have did?
a little background story:
I am 13 years old and i always googled my symptoms, i never found something. i one day talked to my family about it and my sister searched it up she found something called depersonalization but as i searched more and more i found "did" so when i looked for infos all the symptoms kinda were right, i am afraid to tell my mom that i wanna see a doctor also since i was bullied i am afraid of judgement or embarassment and this situation could cause that. also i've been asking myself if the host can control over the other alters and how the switch feels, do you know when you switch?
and inner monologue is it normal that this voice talks with itsself or it feels like i am not the only one talking.. they never talk at the same time so isn't that just my inner voice everyone has? the voice that talks about decisions and the voice that reads that here..
thanks for the answer if i'll get one already
hello, i am a fourteen year old girl. i haven’t really been suspecting me to have DID until around three months ago? and i’m still not quite sure. i haven’t seen a psychiatrist or any doctor because i’m too scared that there’s a possibility that i could have it. i do get frequent headaches and they often can’t be fixed with medicine. although i don’t think i have any alters? but is it possible for someone with DID to never communicate with their alters and possibly not even know they exist? sometimes i get these like almost panic attacks? and where it’s like i’ll space out and just be thinking too hard about a certain topic. and when that happens i’ll get really bad headaches and then i won’t even be able to tell what’s real and what’s not. i’ve tried to google it a lot but can’t really find the answer. whenever that happens i feel as if nothing is real. and sometimes i can’t tell the difference between reality and non reality almost like as if everything had been a dream. i’m sorry if i don’t make any sense but i just really don’t know what’s going on.
Hello, Karen. You do make sense, and I understand you quite well. It is possible for someone with DID to not be aware of their alters until later in therapy. I know you are afraid of seeing a doctor because you are scared of the diagnosis, but seeking professional help is essential to get clear answers to the questions you have. Please keep in touch and let us know how you are doing.
Hi I have a friend with DID and one of her alters is very violent and extremely psychopathic. It’s so bad that my girlfriend (who is her best friend) is scared to be around her when that alter comes out. I know this may sound harsh but is there any way you know of to force a switch? Even if it’s not back to the host? She’s just genuinely terrifying when that alter is out.
Causing a switch, is BAD...end of. Things will only get worse.
This Alter needs more care and attention than the others.
Hi... i just realized my fiancee has DID (3 headmates).. I dont believe they talk to eachother but know of eachother! Wedding planning may have triggered the switch + other emotional stresses, but this new alter is nasty and has/is trying to sabotage ALL his relationships (3rd time engaged)... do i make him aware of the condition (to help bring to light we need help) as i refuse to lose the man i love?
Hi, Nix. Thank you for your comment and being. part of our online community. If you have concerns about your fiance's health, I would definitely address them with him in a concerned and supportive tone. Thank you.
I have a question! so a therapist once told me that there’s a possibility i could have DID. So i was wondering, is it supposed to be obvious to you if you have it? i don’t even know how i would be able to recognize the signs.
Hi, Maddie. Thank you for your comment and for being part of our community. It is very often the case that the individual does not know they have DID until someone else points it out. People with DID know that something is different about him- or herself but do not know what it is. It is not always obvious that it is DID. Every system is different, so you may not be able to tell the signs. That doesn't negate the possibility you might have DID. My suggestion is to read as much as you can on DID. HealthyPlace has excellent resources to help you understand the disorder, and, with the help of your therapist, consider the signs and symptoms you might be experiencing.
I just discovered thru my therapist that what I thought was my wild imagination for years is actually DID. I can talk to my others in a room in my head (Fraser’s table) but I’d like to know if they can hear my thoughts or my conversations when not in that room. I’m feeling really paranoid about that now.
Just curious, I see a lot of videos on YouTube of people who supposedly have DID but I'm really sceptical. Do people with DID really have complete wardrobes, hairstyles and makeup looks for each altar?
I think it depends on how many alters and what their preferences are. I have two alters, but we all share blue as our favorite color, so that simplifies things. But I don’t wear makeup, one of them does. One wears “pretty” things, while I care only about comfort. We don’t have completely different wardrobes, but we do have more choices than any one of us would have. What my hairstyle and color is depends on who shows up for the appointment. Sometimes we agree on something (or at least compromise), sometimes we don’t. Often we don’t.
this is just another story.. I'm wondering what is happening inside of me. 'Cause there are so many things I don't think fit my current diagnosis of b(orderline)pd and ptsd. Few years ago I considered a dissociative disorder but I'm not sure. Maybe it's not DID exactly but I know there a fragments of "me" which crave different things. But "I" can't really get in touch or influence them. I wish there was some kind of communication I could try.
Hope I can make some sense out of this soon x
BPD has become a controversial label in recent years, and for good reason. Smart therapists and researchers in the field recognize and acknowledge that what is labeled BPD is really a trauma disorder. And many people with complex (developmental) trauma develop c-ptsd, so it also goes to follow that there are many with the BPD label who also dissociate. It makes sense, when you read up on it.
It really doesn’t matter if it’s “just” a dissociative disorder or if it’s the whole caboodle of DID. They exist on a continuum, a spectrum, if you will. What you call it really shouldn’t matter.
If you were my good friend and you confided in me what you posted here, I would tell you that I would feel a lot better if you saw a recognized leader or expert in the field of trauma. You can check the ISSTD (International Society for Study Of Trauma) for a qualified professional. I wish I had done that nine years ago, instead of wasting years and so much money on therapists who were not at all qualified and should have known that.
So be good to yourself, and go see a qualified expert. Look up Sandra Paulsen, PhD, and the organizations she belongs to, as well as her colleagues. These people can help you. It’s worth giving it a shot. You deserve that. You do not deserve to be slapped with a pejorative label like BPD.
I was diagnosed with DID in the early 90s. I worked with a therapist for nearly 25 years, not nearly all the work was on DID. She retired. I'm close to 83 and a new alter has appeared: a very young child, at most 2 years old. I have learned many techniques and achieved much integration but this kid has me buffaloed. My question for the community is do any of you know any techniques for communicating with a pre-verbal alter?
I have an alter around the ages of 3-5, but they are entirely nonverbal. It feels like there's a blockade in my throat when they front. What I've done to make that period easier is use writing/typing to communicate when possible, and to buy and use things that are comforting to them (toys, watching children's media, etc) . A lot of very young alters hold a lot of trauma, it may be helpful to do something that works to de-trigger other alters, things that make you feel calm and safe.
ok so hi, im a 14 year old girl and i feel like im kinda losing my mind. um most of the times i wake up its from a voice calling my name, they are all different, idk how to explain it but one of them wakes me up just a couple seconds before my alarm and the others all have their different ways of yelling my name or sometimes even whispering it. I have these urges to do things i normally wouldn't do like for example; i hate pink but sometimes i find myself wanting to run to it and i know this may sound crazy but sometimes i feel like there is actual you know, people up there I've given names or atleast i think i did i have an image of how each looks and idk [all this stuff has been happening for as long as i can remember but i learned tht its not normal so now im actually acknowledging it]. I've found text messages in my phone that i dont remember sending i also saw a message left in my notes that i dont recall writing. many of my civics classes or social studies classes [which are the 2 classes i feel most anxious in because of the teachers] i dont remember going to or being present in. just last week apparently i gave my teacher my book in i.t and i dont even remember doing it i actually thought my book was still in my bag but idk she had it. all i know is that i have headaches that won't go away, my vision and hearing do become very cloudy and i cant comprehend it. even right now i just lost my train of thought i was going to write something but i just blanked out. I talked to my friends about it and one of them suggest that i have did but im to afraid of therapy or going to my mother. i just want to know if im just imagining this all or if this is actually a serious case. anyone can help me out?
I know almost fully how you feel. I’ve been having a lot of episodes like that, and it’s terrifying me. I hope you figure it out soon!
Yes, its a serious case, you should probably go to a psychiatrist and tell them your symptoms, it may be scary but it is necessary for a healthy brain.
Hi, I’m starting to believe my best friend has DID. Last night she messaged me a really long story that she wrote herself that was heavily existential and so far removed from how she normally writes. We like to send each other poems and stories that we wrote, but this wasn’t even close to what or how she normally writes. She then started talking to me directly, and again, it wasn’t at all how she normally talked. I’d ask her questions such as “are you ok? What’s wrong?” And instead of a clearcut answer like normal she responded with “Thoughts and feelings and the mind, but I have healed some of the hurts. We will be ok.” She was an entirely different person, claiming to have separated from herself when I asked if she was dissociating (she has a history of depression and anxiety and occasionally she has dissociated episodes, but never this bad) and calling herself “we.” A normal response from her would have just been yes or no, and if she was dissociating like she used to she would jump at the chance to talk to someone familiar, but whoever took over refused to talk. This morning I asked her if she was ok, and she claimed to have no memory whatsoever of the night before or her conversation with me. She then said she was a bit scared because this has happened before where there were entire chunks of time lost and she would “wake up” hours later in a place she doesn’t remember going to, doing something she would normally hate. I asked her to set up an appointment with a therapist and I’ve been researching all day trying to find ways to help her or to understand what is happening to her. If anyone has any other advice or wants to share their take on all this I would gladly appreciate it. I’m very worried about her and I want to help my best friend cope with this.
Among most of you, I also have been diagnosed with DID and although I’m not an expert, this was exactly the information we were looking for. It is so complicated to explain and this article has given us the courage to stay strong.
i have just come to realize this has been occurring. i have been in various therapies and treatment for borderline throughout the years..but the amnesia is new. close friends have reported i develop a lisp as well? do you recommend a book to help me cope with the memory loss and prevention of switching ?
I think my husband has switched. His behavior I completely different from normal and I don't know what to do... How do I approach this alter gently.. I've not met this one before, he's new to me. Can I get my husband back? Please help!! I'm very scared because this alter is talking divorce and my husband wouldn't do that. We have 4 children and I don't want to lose him to an alter..
I find myself in exactly the same situation. I hope you have managed to find ways to. Communicate with your husband.
i've had an alter get locked out, we call it when a personality "dies"
um, so far switches haven't been stopped, just delayed massively, causing the alter to be tired for long periods of time. switching for me takes lots of energy and if i don't have enough energy for it, i usually pass out and switch while i'm asleep.
Is it possible to completely stop a switch from happing? Or be in mid switch and come back to yourself?
And can an alter be locked away if so can they also come back?
Also forgot to write I have the same issue with remembering things from my past and knowing if the memories are real or not. I do remember hearing my name called alot too but never thought of that as possibly being related or not. I have no idea I first heard about DID lastnight so I'm not intirely sure if I could have it or not but its nice to know other people out there experience the same.
I'm the same Dylan, I am very girly but sometimes act completely manly... its so odd like when I feel manly it feels like this is who ive always been and like talking to my partner and hes mates like I'm one of the boys, but then I can feel a sudden change loose interest in the converatations, feel stupid and like what am I doing and then carry on doing what I was doing before... I have a similar things with sports but I'm not sporty, and gothic things, but I'm not into black or heavy music unless I'm "in that mood".
Hi, I'm starting to really starting to suspect that I have this disorder. There are a lot of memories from my early childhood that I keep questioning if were real or not. It's hard to explain. It's like I have some memory of it happening but I just can't be sure. I used to here voices calling my name. Not so much anymore though. What I've most recently noticed about myself is that I'm always wanting to do something else that I definently wouldn't normally do. A few months ago I was suddenly heavily interested in makeup and men. I'm a guy btw. I don't feel the same way anymore now. I don't find guys attracted like I did before and i dont want to wear makeup. Maybe that was a alter/personality trying to come out? I don't know. There has been more cases like that too. I need help figuring this out.
hi, i have DID. Im 39 year old female. She talks to the bad men because her " HEADMATES" are trying to become fulfilled, they are looking for something. she may not be in communication with ALL her headmates, it sounds like one of them is acting out, MIne do the same. I found online that I was on a "dating app" but have no memory of setting up account, so she needs to sit down and "TALK" with them about no doing destructive things to YOUR relationship or just accept it and take precautions...
I think my wife is switching some times because some times when we have strong or conversation her eyes blink and she seems to be disconected from the subject we are talking but this is only for about. 1 minute do consider this DID symptoms
Also she is talking by WhatsApp with bad strange man and always I ask her why you talk with this bad man she apologize and says that she felt it was not her but other person and again after apology she next day with him
Is this also symptom of DID
Pls I need urgent reply it is very important
I need to be educated in this subject please send me your contact information to review this article on how to get back to my self and understand my condition so that I can live without the need of something that is not a good idea for me
Yeah, when someone figures that all out let me know too. I am sick of this! I functioned for many, many years and now I don't. What am I going to do?