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Depression Symptoms

This past week, I was struck by how much of a role food cravings play in the dance of my moods. When tired, stressed or feeling low, I consistently found myself reaching for sweets to get through. Cookies, cake, or pudding: it didn’t matter, so long as carbohydrates were involved. I didn’t want to keep eating in such an unhealthy way. Yet despite my best intentions, I returned again and again to the very foods I had forsworn just hours earlier. Then I would get frustrated and beat myself up for breaking my promise. After sinking to polishing off a dinner of pretzels and double chocolate chip cookies one night, I tried to sit in awareness of my chaotic, depression feelings. The question came to mind: What are you feeding?
Chronic pain is part of my depression, and it's making me feel so very uncomfortable tonight. I have several health problems that stem from having depression and their symptoms are often more debilitating than depression is on its own. Some come from the stress of having depression, others are a side-effect of my antidepressants. Overcoming my pain is complex, and it often feels like this never ending cycle of chronic pain, depression and pills.
If you’re familiar with depression, you’re familiar with black and white thinking, or thinking in absolutes such as, “I can’t do anything right.” I find that even when I am not in a depressed state, noticing black or white thinking can be one of the first signs that my mood is starting to wobble. I’ve learned that with mood, I’d rather address a slightly low mood from the get-go than wait until I have to dig myself out of a deeper depression. And the key with addressing black and white thinking is to move from black and white to gray. Black and white is limited. Gray embraces the range of possibilities.
Depression and alcohol can be a dangerous combination. Drinking alcohol when you're depressed can worsen your depression. Similarly, drinking alcohol when you're in depression remission can seriously jeopardize that remission.
Depression remission can be brief, lasting mere days. If you're lucky, depression remission can last weeks or months before a depression relapse occurs. It is important when your depression is in remission, to make the most of it. Here's how I do it.
From the hot tears of anguish to the cold, unfeeling stare of painful indifference, depression and emotions go hand-in-hand. And, make no mistake - indifference is a very powerful emotion. I've lost whole days to indifference wherein I cared about nothing, including my husband and children. I wish I could say I felt nothing during those days of indifference, but the truth is, the only thing I did feel was pain. I simply had no tears left.
My depression symptoms are a big part of me and I hate them (What Are the Symptoms of Depression?). Ergo, I hate a big part of me. Wait! That can't be right, can it?
Have you ever noticed how it's only BAD news that gets the ratings? And the bad news is SO depressing! Missing Malaysia flight 370, Putin in Crimea, the Pistorius murder trial - and that isn't even the worst of the crappy news.
It has been a very long, cold, depressing winter. Snow storms. Ice storms. Wind chills that can freeze your face. I spent a lot of my days hunkered down inside the house, battling my depression symptoms as best I could. But, spring has sprung and it's finally time to get outside!
One of the most frustrating symptoms of depression is its ability to mess with your ability to concentrate. Even now, as I write this blog, my mind is flitting from thought to thought, topic to topic, and then to almost empty, blank.