It's Time to Say Goodbye to 'Bipolar Vida'
As many of you know, I have just graduated from college, and it’s time for me to begin my journey into “Real Life.” I’m not quite sure what this means for me quite yet, but I can feel many, many changes coming my way, and that means a loss of stability - at least for awhile (Stability in Bipolar Disorder Requires Routine).
I no longer have my regular schedule and routines that I have had for the past few years, and I have all of this free time that does not really feel like free time. This free time includes the hunt for a job and trying to work on my hobbies, but I have no idea where to go from here.
At this point in my life, I feel as if I need to reinvent myself, my routines and set some new goals, and in order to do this, I think it’s best for me to take a step back for a while and focus on some alone time and introspection. Of course, I’m not really leaving any of you. My social media accounts are still up and running, and I’m always available via email. Also, of course, bipolar advocacy is my number one passion, and I am not leaving that behind either (You Are Your Own Biggest Mental Health Advocate).
I wish all of you the best of luck, and thank all of you so much for your comments, stories, suggestions, and feedback.
Poe, A. (2013, December 16). It's Time to Say Goodbye to 'Bipolar Vida', HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2020, June 5 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/bipolarvida/2013/12/the-time-has-come-to-say-goodbye
Author: Alexa Poe
Dearest Alexa: I'm full of strong emotions while writing this to you.
My Christmas plans shattered due to too many embarrassing in public meltdowns.
Thought I'd give my sister & brother in law a break from all the nonsense / sickness.
We've had one of the worst ice storms in history here since Friday.
I've not been sleeping to top it off,my ex rang me last night kept calling..
While I was trying my best to not explode and explain,there's no way in hell this can work...then he kept bitching about the weather...
As I wear bifocals & am not hearing impaired could hear the freezing rain coming down in torrents.
I just lost my reserved calm,so to speak...
I thought OMG he's being disrespectful to me...
Soooo,second later ring ring goes the phone.
I did not answer it....
I did not cry
But I did not sleep.
I feel he did this purposely to ruin me by the fucking holidays...
I feel alone
I feel very very depressed.
I had my shit together,wtf did I even pick up???
Last thing he said was sweetly I will die way before you.
Hope so asshole cause you ruined all the hard work,believe me it was..trying to help my girlfriend BFF.....
What about me?
I don't want anyone to even come near me,I'm hurt angry hypo manic & depressed &
ALONE....teardrops will come..there's nothing left of me to give,hardly even to my cat.
Why did he do this why did I answer???? Is God punishing me???
If so for what??? My sister would blow her fuse even my BFF wouldn't understand.
,I just want,freedom,love ( not just sex) and no more confusion.
I'll miss you Alexa. ....I hope I make it bipolar is shit,no one gets it less their Drs or fellow victims....I'm getting flashbacks I can't live this way anymore I don't even want to.