There are times when conflicting feelings cause a person to ask, "Am I gay?" This is a natural question and one many people ask at different points in their lives. Indeed, some people do not come to the conclusion that they are or are not gay until well into adulthood.

But how do you know if you're gay? Is experiencing sexual attraction to the same sex all there is to being gay? Is there a test that can tell you whether you're gay?

Am I Gay – Is There a Homosexuality Test?

In the 1950s and 1960s, it was believed, in some circles, that it was possible to test for homosexuality and such a test was developed in Canada. During the test, the subject's pupils would be measured as they looked at images ranging from mundane to pornographic. It was thought that the subject's eyes would dilate when they viewed an image in which they had sexual interest.¹

However, this test was based on many faulty assumptions and it has long since been shown that no test can tell you whether you are gay or not. "Gay tests" that are seen online are not valid in any way and cannot indicate whether or not you are gay.

Gay rating scales, like the Heterosexual-Homosexual Rating Scale (sometimes known as the Kinsey Scale), do exist, however. These rating scales aim to classify people not as "gay" or "straight" but rather indicate that most people do not experience exclusively gay or straight experiences. Most people, regardless as to their sexual identity, do experience both homosexual and heterosexual feelings and/or behaviors at different times in their lives.²

Gay rating scales allow individuals to rate themselves rather than assigning a rating.

How Do You Know if You Are Gay?

It can be hard for some people to know whether or not they are gay, but it's important to remember that deciding you are gay is a personal decision and not a clinical one. Some people that have homosexual experiences continue not to identify as gay while others that have never had a homosexual experience and rather, just have homosexual feelings, may call themselves gay. Moreover, some people identify as gay at one point in their lives and then identify in another way at other points. Sexuality is personal and many consider it to be fluid.

The label "gay" then is one that is best identified by oneself based on one's sexual attractions and behaviors.

Remember though, there is no rush to decide whether you are gay or not. Sometimes feelings of sexuality come on slowly and initially are confusing and hard to identify.³

"With time, someone who is gay will realize that not only are they sexually attracted to members of the same sex, but that this attraction is not transitional, or as often described 'just a phase'. This realization could come at any time during their lives. Many people become aware of gay feelings during their teenage years, as this is when they begin to learn more about their sexuality and identity. However, the difficulties associated with accepting these feelings and coming out gay mean that many gay people don't identify themselves as gay until later on in life."

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Estimates as to the number of gay people in the population range from 1-in-20 to 1-in-10, so why are some people gay? Are they gay by choice or is being gay genetic?

The simplest answer is to look at the definition of the word "gay." The term gay is a synonym for homosexual, which is defined as,^1,2

"Of, pertaining to, or exhibiting sexual desire or behavior directed toward a person or persons of one's own sex."

In other words, 5-10% of people experience same-sex sexual attraction or behavior; of course, this doesn't speak to what makes people gay. No one knows for certain why any individual is gay, but the current thought is that being gay is not a choice. (read: Cure the Gay: Gay Conversion Therapy – Real or Hoax?) The reasons people are gay are both physiological and psychological.

Why Are People Gay? – Physiology

Modern science is working to show that genetics is one of the causes of being gay, although some science conflicts in this area. According to Psychology Today,³

"In recent years, evidence has accumulated that a homosexual orientation is inherited. Study of family history reveals that homosexual men have more homosexuals in their family tree than do heterosexuals."

The precise genes involved in the causes of being gay have not yet been identified but they appear to come from the mother.

Additionally, some studies have found that the brains from homosexuals differ from the brains of heterosexuals. The connections in the amygdala and the corpus callosum have both been shown to be different depending on the sexual orientation of the individual.⁴

Why Are People Gay? – Psycho-Social Reasons

Psychological reasons also appear to be part of why a person is gay. According to Avert.org, what makes people gay may include:⁵

• A female-dominated upbringing in a gay man's past, with an absence of a male role model
• Adherence or deviance from conformity to gender roles
• Family environment
• Individual experiences
• An individual's sense of self

While psychological factors may increase the likelihood that someone is gay, no single factor is known to cause homosexuality.

Is Being Gay a Choice?

Considering whether people choose to be gay is complex. It very much appears that same-sex sexual attraction is not a choice but acting on it is; so if you define gay as the mere presence of same-sex attraction, then from everything we understand, being gay is not a choice.

If, on the other hand, you consider someone to be gay only if they act on their same-sex attraction then being gay can be considered a choice depending on an individual's behavior.

But the real question is, does this really matter? If a person is an adult, is it anyone's business whom he or she is attracted to or has sexual relations with? Whether science can ultimately prove the biology of being gay or not, it's important to support all adults in their choices no matter how they identify.

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Being gay is nothing to be ashamed of nor is it anything that needs "fixing" (Why are people gay?) but that doesn't mean that gay therapy can't be useful. While there are some groups that try to "treat" homosexuality in order change it, the gay therapy discussed in this article refers to therapy designed to help someone deal with issues around their sexuality and not in any way change it.

Issues in Gay Treatment

People who are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or queer (LGBTQ, in this article, simply referred to as "gay") seek help for many of the same issues that heterosexuals do. These issues might be:

• Stress
• Work-related
• Family-related
• Depression
• Anxiety

And many other issues that affect gay and straight people alike. Nevertheless, a gay person may feel more comfortable discussing their issues with a gay therapist or a known gay-friendly therapist.

Gay-specific mental health issues are also likely to come up in gay therapy. Issues like anxiety, depression and addiction disorders are known to be more prevalent in gay individuals (Homosexuality [LGBT] and Mental Health Issues) and gay issues are often linked to these conditions. Gay discrimination and stigma put gay people at particular risk for these mental health challenges.¹

Other reasons a person might seek gay therapy include:

• Dealing with homophobia
• Dealing with societal prejudice
• Coming to terms with one's sexuality
• Coming out gay
• Negotiating family relationships (including gay marriage)

Finding Gay Therapists

Finding a gay therapist is actually not as hard as you might think. There are many directories of gay and gay-friendly therapists available.

One way to find an openly gay therapist or one that specializes in gay issues is to use the search tool provided by TherapyTribe. TherapyTribe lists therapists from the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom and Australia.

To use the TherapyTribe therapist search tool, select "Gay Lesbian Issues" from the "I'm looking for help with" drop-down box and then enter your zip or postal code and click Search.

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Gay discrimination and gay stigma are still a problem in today’s workplace, school and even at home.

In the past, homosexuality was considered an illness and open hostility towards gay people was the norm; seeing much of this gay stigma disappear may lead some to believe that gay discrimination is a thing of the past, but unfortunately, this is not the case. Homophobia is still alive and well in North America and is perpetuated by some laws, politicians, religions and individual ideologies. Moreover, gay discrimination and stigma still harms people, particularly youth, who identify as gay. (more on gay bullying)

What is Gay Discrimination and Homophobia?

Gay discrimination is the act of treating people who identify as gay as lesser than those who identify in other ways (generally heterosexual). For example, if a player is not chosen for a sports team based on the fact that they are gay, that is a form of gay discrimination.

Similarly, homophobia is broadly defined as the hostility towards, or the fear of, gay people, but it can also refer to social ideologies that stigmatize homosexuality. Homophobia is seen in negative attitudes towards the non-heterosexual community, relationships and identity.¹ Homophobia often leads to gay discrimination.

Homophobia also manifests as:

• Homophobic jokes and remarks
• The usage of homosexual terms in a negative context (Such as, "oh, that party was so gay.")
• Bullying
• Malicious gossip
• Physical and emotional attacks
• Vandalism
• Theft
• Negative media representation

Homophobia can even be so strong as to make a parent denounce a child all together and many teens are made homeless every year because of this gay stigma. In the United States, between 20-40% of young homeless people are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender.

What Causes Gay Discrimination and Homophobia?

While any one person may have homophobic thoughts for individual reasons, researchers have found similar traits among those with prejudiced views against gays. Those who are homophobic typically:²

• See the category of "gay" to be clearly defined (in other words, you are gay or you are not)
• Think all homosexuals are alike
• Think that important decisions can be made based on the information that one is homosexual

In contrast, those who do not exhibit gay stigma tend to believe:

• Homosexuality is biological
• Homosexuality cannot be changed
• Homosexuality is universally occurring

(More on why people are gay and whether they are gay by choice or because of genetics.)

HIV and AIDS Stigma

In some, there are strong feelings of HIV and AIDS stigma and in many cases, this is closely linked to gay stigma. This began when homosexuals were tied to, and held responsible for, the spread of HIV and AIDS. Gay stigma was reinforced in the media with headlines like:

• Alert over "gay plague"
• "Gay plague" may lead to blood ban on homosexuals

Even though we now understand that HIV and AIDS are not a "gay plague" and homosexuals are in no way responsible for these illnesses, AIDS and HIV stigma, as well as homophobia, continue to be major barriers to ending the global AIDS epidemic as homosexuals still feel too much discrimination to access vital HIV prevention, treatment, and care services.

How to Cope with Homophobia and Gay Stigma

Unfortunately, some people have a very hard time coping with homophobia and gay stigma and find themselves with feelings of shame, self-hatred, and low self-esteem. It doesn't have to be this way though. There are productive ways of dealing with gay stigma:³

• Learn that gay stigma is wrong – confirm for yourself that homophobia and gay discrimination is wrong by learning more about it
• Find the right people – surround yourself by loved ones who support you and those that may be going through similar situations themselves
• Get professional help – it's okay to admit that you can't handle homophobia and gay stigma on your own. Find a gay therapist to feel less isolated.
• Share your experiences – find a safe space such as a gay support group where you can share your experiences with others
• Join an advocacy group – join a group that actively fights gay stigma and discrimination

The key is to remember that you are not alone and that there are people who will accept you for who you are – you just have to find them.

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Gay bullying and gay bashing are actions that hurt us all. Even if we are not bullied or bashed directly, it is likely we know someone who is. A rash of gay suicides in 2011 proves how deadly gay bullying can be. Here are just four:¹

• September 9: Billy Lucas, age 15, of Greensburg, Indiana, hanged himself from the rafters of his family's barn
• September 19: Seth Walsh, 13, of Tehachapi, California, hanged himself from a tree in his yard
• September 22: Tyler Clementi, 18, a Rutgers University freshman, jumped off the George Washington Bridge in New York City
• September 23: Asher Brown, 13, of Houston, Texas, shot himself in the head

Gay bullying statistics indicate that gay teens are two-to-three times more likely to commit suicide than other youths and about 30% of all suicides have been linked to a gender identity crisis.²

None of these deaths had to occur, but they did because each of these people was sent the message that it was better to be dead than to be gay.

What is Gay Bullying, Gay Bashing?

Gay bullying and gay bashing is bullying or treating one poorly because they are gay (definition of gay) or because they are thought to be gay. The targets are primarily people who do not fit into gender stereotype roles whether they are, in fact, gay or not. Gay bullying statistics indicate that 9-out-of-10 gay youth have been subject to bullying and that, of those, almost half were physically harassed and a quarter report being physically assaulted.

Gay bullying or gay bashing may be:

• Name-calling
• Taunting
• Mocking, making jokes
• Violent anti-gay images
• Gay discrimination
• Physical or sexual assault

Any individual minor incidence of gay bullying or gay bashing may be something that someone can deal with but the main problem with it is its pervasive and consistent nature to the point where it injures an individual's self-esteem and desire to live.

Adult Gay Bullying

And while we often think of children or teens when we think gay bullying, bullying occurs in adult situations, such as in the workplace, as well. Adult bullies are more likely to use verbal bullying than physical bullying but the result is the same: their attempt to humiliate and gain power over their target.

Stop Gay Bullying – How People Are Working to Stop Gay Bashing

Many organizations are dedicated to stop gay bashing and gay bullying and there are more and more initiatives locally, like in high schools, to stop gay bashing. Over 4000 Gay-Straight Alliances are now registered with the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network and initiatives such as "No Name-Calling Week" now exist to put the spotlight on all types of bullying and bashing.³

If you are being bullied, dealing with gay bashing can seem daunting, but there are many things you can do.

• Tell a teacher or principal (in the workplace: the human resources department or a supervisor)
• Get involved in gay supportive organizations
• Surround yourself with supportive individuals
• Consider seeing a gay therapist (gay therapy) for understanding and support

And always remember that it gets better. You won't be in that gay bullying environment forever and acceptance is possible. See the incredible It Gets Better Project for hope from people just like you for more details.⁴

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LGBTQ+ support groups and gay support organizations are critical, especially for people who, initially, find it difficult to come out as gay and can benefit from the support of others. Gay support groups and organizations work to support people of minority sexuality such as gay, lesbian, queer, transgender, and bisexual. Some gay support organizations are specifically dedicated to supporting individuals while others focus on rights issues and gay politics as well. (There are also groups that support parents of gay children.)

Why Go to a Gay Support Group?

Some people feel very alone when they come to the realization that they are gay, but the fact is, they are not alone. It's estimated that between 5-10% of the North American population is non-heterosexual but often, people need to reach out to find others like them. A gay support group can help with this. In addition to putting a person in touch with others like them, gay support groups also make people feel comfortable in knowing that when they share information about themselves, they are telling others who have lived the same experience. In gay support groups, no one is judged for their sexuality and is only supported. Gay support groups tend to be peer-run organizations.

Online Gay Support Groups

There are some advantages to online gay support groups. For example, they are available in any location, at any time of day and they can be the first step for those not prepared to talk face-to-face with other gay individuals yet.

One place online gay support groups can be found is through DailyStrength.org. Thousands of people are members of these online support groups which cover everything from coming out to parenting to being transgender.

Another online gay community is at EmptyClosets.com. Here, there are gay support groups, as well as places to socialize. Supportgroups.com also offers gay support groups.

Gay Support Organizations, Gay Support Helplines

The GLBT National Help Center is a gay support organization that runs gay support helplines, gay youth support as well as peer-support chat and contains a database of gay resources. The helplines are:

• GLBT National Hotline: 1-888-843-4564
• GLBT National Youth Talkline: 1-800-246-7743 (PRIDE)

To find a gay support organization near you, use GLBTNearMe.org, The GLBT National Resource Database. GLBTNearMe.org can put you in touch with local gay support organizations and national organizations.

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Many people aren't aware of this, but homosexuals face gay mental health challenges. As the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) are clear to note, ". . . the majority of MSM [men who have sex with men] are highly resilient and able to cope successfully with many negative life stressors, such as those associated with homophobia and discrimination;"¹ however, this doesn't mean that there aren't specific gay mental health challenges.

Gay Mental Health – Increased Risks

Homosexuality is not a medical or mental health disorder but the pressures placed on gay men such as discrimination and homophobia can have a negative impact on their health. According to the CDC, research has found that gay men are at increased risk of:

• Major depression during adolescence and adulthood
• Bipolar disorder
• Generalized anxiety disorder during adolescence and adulthood
• Suicide
• Use of illegal drugs

Gay mental health issues also include substance use disorders like substance abuse and substance dependence. It is noted by the American Psychological Association that gay men also report a higher use of mental health services.² (info on Gay Therapy, Gay Therapists, Gay Treatment)

Gay Mental Health – Talking to Your Doctor

The Gay and Lesbian Medical Association (GLMA) recommend talking about 10 things with your healthcare provider, three of which pertain to gay mental health.³

1. Coming out to your doctor – in order to get the best gay mental health help possible, it's critical to come out to your doctor. If the doctor does not seem comfortable with you, it's time to find another doctor.
2. Gay addiction treatment – it's critical to discuss any drug or alcohol use with your healthcare provider as gay men are at an increased risk for addiction issues.
3. Gay depression or anxiety – Being gay and depressed or anxious is not uncommon but to get gay depression treatment, you must first make your doctor aware of the issue.

Gays and Addiction

Gay men are more likely to use tobacco, alcohol and other drugs and are more likely to use them in excess. It is thought that there are more gay addicts because of the stress society places gays under particularly due to homophobia. Reasons identified include:⁴

• Sense of self as worthless or bad
• Lack of connectedness to supportive adults and peers
• Lack of alternative ways to view "differentness"
• Lack of access to role models
• Lack of opportunities to socialize with other gays/lesbians except bars
• The risk of contracting HIV

Gay addiction prevention strategies include:

• Public education and policy advocacy aimed at eliminating heterosexism and homophobia
• LGBT cultural competency training for community-based agencies, programs and services, including those focused on substance abuse (e.g., police, health and social services, education, faith community, families and foster care)
• Safer, alternative venues for LGBT youth and those in the process of forming their sexual identities to "come out."

Gay alcoholics may also find that seeking out gay Alcoholics Anonymous groups helpful. Gay Alcoholics Anonymous and other gay addiction support groups can be found here.

Additional Resources

Additional information on gay mental health issues can be found through mental health organizations including:

• Association of Gay and Lesbian Psychiatrists – (215) 222-2800 – www.aglp.org
• LGBT Health Clinics – http://www.cdc.gov/lgbthealth/health-services.htm

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Parents of gay children may be shocked when their kids come out of the closet, but once the dust settles, most parents realize that their child is the same one they have loved and cared for all their lives, they just happen to be gay. And while parental acceptance is one hurdle for a gay child, there are many other issues facing gay kids and their parents. Issues for parents of gay kids as identified by Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG), include:¹

• Family acceptance – can the rest of the family accept the gay child as the parents of the gay child has
• Hate crimes prevention – working to prevent gay bashing and other forms of hate crimes against gay kids
• Health – addressing the health concerns of gay kids as they come into adulthood
• Military – working within the current framework (which currently does not address transgender individuals)
• Relationship recognition – working to achieve equal rights and recognition for gay relationships as for heterosexual relationships
• Safe schools – parents of gay children ensuring a safe learning environment
• Workplace fairness – supporting the gay child and any issues they face when entering the workforce

Parenting a Gay Child – Signs of a Gay Child

Sometimes, long before a child comes out as gay, a parent suspects that a child might be gay. It may be that the child bucks traditional gender stereotypes or they may not show attention to the opposite sex; but are these signs of a gay child?

According to some research, gender atypical behavior may, in fact, be an indicator that the child may grow up to be gay. So, for example, boys that play with dolls and have primarily girlfriends or girls who are tomboys and prefer to play with guns may have an increased likelihood of growing up to be gay. Another sign your child might be gay is if he is a male that chooses more solitary sports such as cycling or swimming. There also appears to be a relationship wherein the more a child shows gender-nonconforming characteristics, the greater the chance that they may grow up to be gay.²

It's important to think about why a parent cares about having a gay child though. While knowing your child is gay may help you ease the transition into adulthood, it's critical to remember that a gay child is just a child like any other and a parent of gay child is just a parent, like any other. Parents of gay kids must come to accept and love their children for who they are and not because of their sexuality.

Support for Parents of Gay Children

There is no doubt though, parents of gay children often go through an adjustment period. Organizations, though, are available to help support parents of gay kids.

The most well-known organization is Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG). PFLAG was started in 1972 with the act of a mother publicly supporting her gay son. Parents of gay kids can find 200,000 PFLAG supporters in 350 chapters across the United States. PFLAG supports loved ones of homosexuals by providing helplines, support group meetings, education and resources. PFLAG also advocates for the rights of homosexuals on a local, state and national level.

To find a PFLAG chapter near you, use the PFLAG search tool found here.

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Sexual side effects from antidepressants are a common problem facing both men and women. Unfortunately, studies show that some doctors don’t give enough attention to this issue. While a physician’s goal in depression treatment is to alleviate the symptoms of depression, the patient may see their sex life as being just as important as symptom reduction. Antidepressant sexual dysfunction, therefore, may be one reason why people stop taking their depression medications.

Antidepressant sexual side effects include problems like:

• the inability to get or maintain an erection
• not being able to achieve orgasm
• lack of interest or pleasure in sex or pursuing sexual mates

The severity of sexual side effects depends on the individual’s reaction to the medication along with the specific type and dose of antidepressant. In research studies, 30-40 percent of patients taking antidepressant medication complain of sexual side effects, but the numbers could be as high as 70 percent because many are embarrassed to admit they have a problem. Others haven’t tied the sexual side effects to the antidepressant medication they’re taking.

Which Antidepressants Cause the Most Sexual Side-Effects?

In a large 2001 University of Virginia study looking into antidepressant sexual dysfunction, researchers found that selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) and serotonin and norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors (SNRIs) were associated with a higher rate of sexual dysfunction. SSRI antidepressants include:

• Citalopram (Celexa)
• Escitalopram (Lexapro)
• Fluoxetine (Prozac, Prozac Weekly, Selfemra, Sarafem)
• sertraline (Zoloft)

SNRI antidepressants include:

• Venlafaxine (Effexor, Effexor XR )
• Desvenlafaxine (Pristiq)
• Duloxetine (Cymbalta)

Other classes of antidepressants, tricyclics and MAOIs, are also associated with higher rates of sexual side effects. A complete list of antidepressants by class can be found here.

Antidepressants with the Fewest Sexual Side-Effects

Antidepressants with fewer sexual side effects are Bupropion (Wellbutrin) and Mirtazapine (Remeron, Remeron SolTab). A newer antidepressant, vilazodone (Viibryd) is also reported to have a very low incidence of sexual side effects. More studies, however, are needed to confirm that.

Managing Sexual Side-Effects of Antidepressants

The big problem facing doctors is determining whether sexual dysfunction is caused by antidepressants or depression. One way to figure that out is for the doctor to lower the dosage and see what happens. On the other side, doctors and their patients then have to worry about the depression returning.

For some people, sexual side effects are not a priority or may disappear within a month or two after starting treatment, as their bodies adjust to the medication. For others, sexual side effects continue to be problematic. If you're taking an antidepressant that causes sexual side effects, discuss these ideas with your doctor:

• Schedule sex before taking an antidepressant if you’re taking a once-a-day dose.
• Switch to a different antidepressant that has a lower sexual side effect profile.
• Add a second antidepressant or another type of medication to counter sexual side effects. For example, the Mayo Clinic says the addition of the antidepressant bupropion or the anti-anxiety medication buspirone may ease sexual side effects caused by an antidepressant.
• Add a medication designed to improve sexual function. Sildenafil (Viagra), tadalafil (Cialis) or vardenafil (Levitra) fall in this category. While these sexual dysfunction medications are designed for men, initial research suggests sildenafil may also improve sexual problems caused by antidepressants in some women.

One warning: do not stop taking your antidepressant medication because of sexual side effects. Your depression could return with a vengeance and suddenly stopping antidepressant medication can lead to horrible side effects. Instead, work with your doctor to find an effective treatment to reduce your sexual side effects and keep your depression under control. This could take time and a bit of trial and error because everyone reacts differently to antidepressants, but hopefully, in the end, you'll find the results worthwhile.

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There are many who claim electroshock therapy for depression, or ECT, isn't what it's cracked up to be. Here's the story of one person who was harmed by electric shock treatment. It is not meant to be representative of all people who have undergone electroshock therapy. To be fair, there are also ECT stories where people say electroconvulsive therapy saved their life. You will certainly want to ask your doctor and read up on ECT side effects before making any decisions on having electroshock therapy.

An Electroshock Therapy Experience

Juli Lawrence created the SHOCKED! ECT website because of her experience with ECT. "I consider it a serious issue, often shrouded in misinformation," says Juli.

Shocked! ECT appeared on the Internet in 1995 after Juli underwent electroshock therapy for depression herself the year before and having what she says was a very bad result.

I am a woman who was severely depressed (re-diagnosed as bipolar disorder during the ECT treatments) and had ECT in 1994. The electroshock therapy, according to my mother, lifted me from a depression into a brief silliness (the euphoric high that typically follows ECT), quickly followed by an even worse depression than before. And it left me with severe memory loss, and I believe some cognitive damage."

"I'm interested in the people who say: "But you're so articulate now, how could electroshock therapy have possibly been destructive?" My answer: You do not know me. You do not know what I was like before I had the electric shock treatment, and you do not know what I am like now. Do not pretend that you know what I feel, what I think or who I am. A few words on a website does not give you a picture of me, other than the picture I 'choose' to present in public. Most people who know me, other than those EXTREMELY close to me never even knew I was depressed. I have a public face, and a private face, and the two are very different. I work very hard at maintaining the public face, and I have worked hard to recover from a very low point. I have never said I was brain dead, simply that there was damage."

Misinformed About Electric Shock Treatment

It took Juli a year to emerge from the fog that resulted from the ECT. It took six years to recover to the point where she was able to fully articulate what happened. "I have spent the last years reading the research, including the studies that ECT experts use to promote the treatment," says Juli. "Day by day, I grow more convinced that ECT is not an effective treatment, and that it does little more than provide a brief respite from depression, followed by despair and hopelessness ... and potential damage to the brain."

As an ECT survivor and activist, Juli maintains her website is not an attempt to dissuade anyone from having ECT. "If you have chosen to have the treatment, I support your decision and wish you well. If you've come looking for information, I sincerely hope that you will find genuine sources of information presenting all sides of ECT, not just the public face that the industry presents. However, you will find plenty of pro-ECT information here, because I think it's important to look at this from every angle."

Regarding stories that ECT is a miracle cure, Juli claims those are trotted out continually when proponents of the treatment try to deflect any negative information. Yet, when former patients come to the forefront to discuss their bad experiences, she says the proponents say their concerns aren't valid, that anecdotal information isn't worthy of recognition. "Well, folks, you can't have it both ways. I receive a lot of email every day from persons considering electric shock treatment, loved ones, and persons who have had ECT and don't understand what happened. They were given promises and those promises were broken."

Juli adds "I believe that if you're going to listen to anecdotal information, you must listen to both sides, not just the 'ECT saved my life' viewpoint. On the other hand, I do believe it's important to hear the happy endings as well. They are important. All of the voices of ECT are important, and should be heard...including mine."

Ed. note: Juli Lawrence had 12 ECT treatments in 1994 and says it caused long-term cognitive damage. At 49, she says she now has trouble learning new things, and she still has problems with her memory. You can read about ECT problems here.

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