Relationship Violence Warning Signs

Signs you should be concerned about relationship violence, date rape or abuse and your personal safety.

Pay Attention to Cues When You Are Getting to Know Someone

Be careful if your date or boyfriend

  • Tells you who you may be friends with, how you should dress, or tries to control other elements of your life or relationship.
  • Gets jealous when there is no reason.
  • Drinks heavily, uses drugs, or tries to get you drunk.
  • Berates you for not wanting to get drunk, get high, have sex, or go with him/her to an isolated or personal place.
  • Refuses to let you share any of the expenses of a date and gets angry when you offer to pay.
  • Is physically violent to you or others, even if it's "just" grabbing and pushing to get his/her way.
  • Acts in an intimidating way toward you by invading your "personal space" (sits too close, speaks as if he/she knows you much better than he/she does, touches you when you tell him/her not to).
  • Is unable to handle sexual and emotional frustrations without becoming angry.
  • Does not view you as an equal--because he/she is older or sees him/herself as smarter or socially superior.
  • A man who thinks poorly of himself and guards his masculinity by acting tough.
  • Goes through extreme mood changes (highs & lows).
  • Is angry and threatening to the extent that you have changed your life so as not to anger him/her.

Be aware of your surroundings at all times and don't put yourself in a position of being alone with someone you are afraid of. If you are concerned about your personal safety, tell someone nearby or get help immediately.

APA Reference
Staff, H. (2021, December 22). Relationship Violence Warning Signs, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2024, July 19 from

Last Updated: March 21, 2022

Medically reviewed by Harry Croft, MD

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