Can depression and love ever happily coexist? Many couples manage to live well despite one or both partners being depressed, but it isn’t always easy. Depression comes with many challenges you might not anticipate at the start of a relationship; these include sex troubles, fatigue, financial strain and poor physical health– all of which can make romantic love difficult to sustain. Here's what to expect from depression and love, as well as some tips to help you overcome the common obstacles.

Depression and Love: Why Is It So Difficult?

Depression and love are more prevalent than you might think. The National Institute of Mental Health estimates that 16.2 million adults in the U.S. have had at least one depressive episode a year. Contrary to popular belief, studies have shown that people in relationships or marriage were no less depressed than those who are single. Quite the opposite was shown to be true in one study, where cohabiting men were found to be less depressed than married men because marriage made them more insular.

Many people experience depression in long-term relationships, so what’s the key to making it work? Can you ever be depressed and happy at the same time?

How to Be Depressed and Happy In Love

Believe it or not, it is possible to sustain a happy relationship when you or your partner has depression. Clinical depression is an illness – it's not a state of mind or a fleeting emotion – and as long as it's treated with care and compassion, there are ways to live well with this diagnosis.

Supportive and loving relationships are vital to happiness and wellbeing, whether these come from romantic partners, family members or friends. Here’s how to get the most out of your relationship when you have depression.

Be honest

If depression and love are going to co-exist (and let’s face it, they will in most relationships at some point), then you and your partner need to create a culture of openness and honesty. The only way to lessen depression’s hold over you is to bring it into the open and let other people help. Talk about your feelings and encourage your partner to listen and accept what you say.

It may also be helpful to tell your partner what you need back when you talk about your depression. Are you looking for advice, support or someone to listen without judgment?

Make each other laugh

We all know that laughter is the best medicine – it helps us create antibodies, decrease stress and diminish physical pain. When you’re depressed, laughter feels impossibly out of reach,  but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try. Humor is an invaluable coping mechanism – just think about beloved comedians like Robin Williams and Jim Carrey who have battled depression and still made audiences laugh.

Laughter is also great for bonding couples together, so next time things start to feel intense, try switching on your favorite comedy show or listening to a funny podcast together. It's okay if you're not always able to see the funny side.

Stay intimate

Depression causes many people to physically withdraw from their partners, which can throw up issues around intimacy and sex. What’s more, both depression and antidepressants can alter the balance of dopamine cells in the brain, causing reduced libido and lack of enjoyment of intercourse.

For all of these reasons, it's important to stay intimate in any way you can – whether that means holding hands, being physically close or communicating honestly and openly about your feelings. Many people find that issues around sex and depression level out once they find the right depression treatment plan, but you may wish to consult your doctor about your options if staying intimate becomes an ongoing struggle ("My Depressed Boyfriend, Partner is Pushing Me Away: Try This").

Work as a Team

Depression is never a choice, and it’s nobody’s fault. There’s no point blaming one another for the challenges in your relationship. So, if you have to blame someone, blame depression. When it comes to depression and love, presenting a united front against the illness will help you feel more bonded and help you channel your frustration without making one another feel bad.

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Depression in marriage is no walk in the park. There is a misconception that people in relationships don't experience depression in the same way that single people do because they're less lonely, but there is no evidence to support this theory. Some studies indicate that married people (men in particular) have higher rates of depression due to increased pressures and isolation from broader society. So what can you do about depression in marriage? Here's how to identify the root of the problem and what to do about it.

Depression in Marriage: Why Is It Happening?

Dealing with depression in a marriage isn’t easy. Whether you, your spouse or both of you are affected by depression, it may take months or even years of depression treatment before you find a solution that works. Even then, depression is mostly managed rather than cured. Depression can feel hopeless, scary and frustrating. But, like any long-term illness, it is easier to navigate with a supportive ally by your side.

But what about when your marriage makes you depressed? And what if you’re already depressed and your relationship doesn’t provide the support you need? Understanding the interplay between marriage and depression is vital to identifying the cause of the problem so you and your spouse can overcome your differences and move on – whether together or alone.

Depression and Marriage: What Comes First?

What comes first: depression or marriage? It's not always easy to tell the difference between a depressing relationship or relationship problems that occur because one or more partners are depressed. It's important to differentiate clinical depression and situational depression here so that you know what you're dealing with.

Clinical depression is a medically diagnosed condition that often has no obvious cause. This kind of depression is a result of a complex set of biological, genetic and environmental factors, and it usually requires lifelong or long-term management.  

Situational depression is not the same as clinical depression, although many of the characteristics are similar. Situational depression occurs when a person becomes sad and withdrawn following an upsetting or traumatic event – such as divorce, bereavement or relationship troubles. Although situational depression may require a short course of treatment to help the person feel better, it usually lifts over time.

So which is it? Here's the thing – it's not always easy to tell. A resounding body of research has shown that depression and marriage (in fact, all relationships) work together cyclically: depression affects the quality of relationships, and the relationships themselves can affect levels of depression. This is one of the reasons why 42% of U.S. adults have seen a counselor at some point in their lives.

Where to Get Help for Depression in Marriage

It may seem like the odds are stacked against marriages where depression is involved, but this isn’t always the case. It’s only when these issues are disguised by conflict and resentment that irreparable damage can occur, awareness and openness about these issues is the first step to resolving them.

If you or your spouse is experiencing symptoms of depression with no obvious cause, it's important to see your doctor and hold off making any major decisions about the relationship. Even moderate to severe depression can get better with treatment, and some people see an improvement in as little as six weeks after starting a course of counseling or antidepressants.

You can also find local therapists by getting a referral through your doctor, your county psychological association or county mental health agency.

See Also:

• Do You Have Depression After Sex? Here’s Why

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Depersonalization disorder may be described as an out of body experience as the main symptom of depersonalization is a feeling of detachment or a feeling that one is an observer of one's thoughts, feelings or body. While most people do experience symptoms of depersonalization in their lives at some time, depersonalization becomes a dissociative disorder when it begins to interrupt daily living and becomes very upsetting. Living with depersonalization disorder may feel like you're watching a movie of your own life, like you're in a dream or that the whole world is "unreal."

Derealisation is associated with depersonalization and it is where a person feels like the objects in his or her environment are changing shape or size, like their surroundings aren't real or that people are inhuman or automated. Derealisation is not a diagnosis in its own right but, rather, is considered part of depersonalization.

People living with depersonalization or derealisation symptoms may feel like they're "going crazy" and may try to check to see if things are actually real.

Define Depersonalisation Disorder

The Diagnostic and Statistical Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5) defines depersonalization disorder as the occurrence of persistent or recurrent episodes of depersonalization and/or derealisation that are not associated with another illness and cause significant distress. Depersonalization symptoms must not be attributable to substance use.

According to Medscape, the signs of depersonalization disorder also include:

• Alertness and orientation in some areas (but not others)
• Limited relatedness and eye contact
• Preoccupation and irritability
• Distressed facial expression with constricted emotion
• Limited to fair reasoning and judgment

A person with depersonalization disorder may feel like a robot like his or her body is distorted or like he or she can't control his or her own actions.

What Causes Depersonalisation Disorder?

What causes depersonalization disorder is not fully understood, but it is thought that it is linked to a chemical imbalance in the neurotransmitters of the brain. This imbalance may make the brain vulnerable to depersonalization disorder when in states of extreme stress.

According to the Mayo Clinic, causes of depersonalization disorder may include:

• Childhood trauma such as witnessing domestic violence or being abused
• Growing up with a significantly impaired parent, such as by mental illness
• Suicide or unexpected death of a loved one
• Severe stress such as relationship, financial or work-related pressures
• Severe trauma such as a car accident

Depersonalization Disorder Treatment

Treatment for depersonalization disorder typically consists of psychotherapy (sometimes called "talk" therapy) but may also include medication to treat some of the depersonalization disorder symptoms. Therapy aims to help an individual understand why he or she experiences depersonalization symptoms in the first place and helps the individual gain control over his or her symptoms. According to the Mayo Clinic, two types of psychotherapy that can treat depersonalization disorder include cognitive behavioral therapy and psychodynamic therapy, although some sources say that psychotherapy is not beneficial.

No medications are Food and Drug Administration approved for the treatment of depersonalization or derealisation symptoms, but some medications have been shown to help. Typically, medications include antidepressants and tranquilizers.

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Zach, who might not first appear to be someone dealing with bulimia, has come to The Doctors to speak candidly about his eating disorder.

 

In this scene from the episode Andrew, Andrew's family discusses his eating disorder and how it affects them.

So, your boyfriend or girlfriend has depression, and you're wondering if you're to blame. Perhaps you have these concerns because you want to make your depressed partner feel better, or maybe your partner is blaming you, and you're not sure how to respond. If you have never experienced depression first-hand, it's easy to get swept up in the myths and misconceptions about depression and relationships. It's also understandable to want to help if your girlfriend or boyfriend has depression. However, there are some facts about depression that you must understand before you turn the problem inward.

Three Things to Consider When Your Girlfriend, Boyfriend Has Depression

If your girlfriend or boyfriend has depression, it is natural to want to find the cause of their suffering so that you can help them feel better. You may also want to point the finger away from yourself to alleviate a guilty conscience. Before you start playing the blame game, however, here are some facts about depression worth considering:

1. Depression and sadness are different

In this article, we are talking about clinical depression (aka major depression) that has been diagnosed by a doctor. Clinical depression is not the same as sadness or grief. It is also not the same as an episode of depression, such as a period of low mood following a traumatic event or relationship breakup.

Although these episodes (also known as "situational depression") may have some of the same symptoms of clinical depression (difficulty sleeping, appetite changes, feeling hopeless, and loss of interest and enjoyment in activities, for example), the depression usually lifts with time. Clinical depression does not improve without some form of treatment. Depression treatment, such as therapy or antidepressant medication, may be ongoing.

2. Depression is no one’s fault

Although lifestyle factors can certainly contribute to a person's mental health, no one person or circumstance is solely to blame for depression. According to medical professionals, depression is caused by a complex set of factors. These include:

• Genetics and biology
• Brain chemistry
• Disturbances to circadian rhythms
• Female sex hormones
• Poor nutrition
• Physical health problems (such as thyroid disorders, Atkinson's and liver disease)
• Drug and alcohol misuse
• Grief and loss
• Stress and trauma

Of course, situational depression can arise from a troubled relationship or breakup. This is the kind of depression that gets better over time, however, and it's unlikely to be your fault alone. Both parties are responsible for the outcome of a relationship in most cases – unless one partner is physically, sexually or emotionally abusive.

3. Unhappy relationships can trigger depression

Although mental illness cannot be traced to one cause alone, relationships do contribute to depression. Studies show that, for 89% of adults, relationships are crucial to wellbeing and emotional health. Evidence also suggests that people in unhappy relationships are three times as likely to experience depression as those who aren’t.

Loving and supportive relationships are vital to our mental health, but challenges are inevitable. If your girlfriend or boyfriend is depressed and you think your relationship is a factor, try to encourage openness and communication, and don't blame one another. Many couples struggle to communicate when one partner has depression, but counseling (either as a couple or one-to-one) can be hugely beneficial.

My Girlfriend, Boyfriend Has Depression: Is It My Problem?

If you want to maintain a healthy relationship with your partner, then yes – their depression is your problem. That doesn't mean you have to understand their illness, but it does mean that you have a responsibility to support them and do everything you can to help without sacrificing your own needs.

If you recognize that the relationship is making you both unhappy, you may want to break up with your partner. Remember – you are totally within your rights to want to end the relationship, even if your boyfriend or girlfriend has depression. If you're worried about your partner's ability to cope in this scenario, you should contact friends and family members who can help. If your partner is suicidal, you should call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255) or contact your local emergency services.

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Knowing how to make a depressed person feel better is notoriously difficult. People with depression find it hard to ask for help, usually because they don’t know what they need or because they’re worried about being a burden on their loved ones. They may push away the very people they love and need the most as a result. Many friends, family members and partners of people with depression feel helpless and pushed away, and this is no one’s fault. If you don’t know how to make a depressed person feel better, here are some ways you can help your loved one beat the shame and stigma and get the help they need.

How to Make a Depressed Person Feel Better: There’s No Magic Wand

Helping a depressed person to feel better would be easy if we could wave a magic wand and make their mental illness disappear. Partners and family members of those with depression often feel helpless because people who are depressed can find it difficult to vocalize their feelings and needs, and they often isolate themselves from others. Those with depression may feel that they are not worthy of help or they may not know what they need or how to ask for it. So why can’t they just tell you what they need?

According to MD J. Raymond DePaulo, director of the Affective Disorders Clinic and the John Hopkins School of Medicine in Baltimore, people with depression experience “significantly diminished” relationship skills, making it hard for them to communicate. This often happens as a result of shame, embarrassment or the anticipation of judgment from others.

Don’t blame yourself if you don’t know what to do when someone you love is depressed. If it were that easy to ease depression, there wouldn’t be so many people suffering (16.2 million adults in the U.S., and 300 million people worldwide, to be precise).

Depression is a serious illness that usually only gets better with treatment, so it is not up to you to provide a cure. There are, however, some ways you can help.

When Someone You Love Is Depressed: 5 Ways You Can Help

Here are five simple ways you can help when someone you love is depressed:

Ask questions, but don’t interrogate them

It can be incredibly frustrating when someone you love is depressed and you don't know the reason. You don't want to interrogate your loved one, however, especially as they may not even know what triggered the depression or how to help themselves feel better ("Causes of Depression: What Causes Depression?").

Don't just say nothing

If you don't know what to say to your loved one with depression – say that. Tell your loved one that you're so sorry they are unwell, and that you simply don't know what to say to make them feel better, even though you care and want to help.

Offer practical help

One of the first things we say to someone we love when they’re distressed is, “Let me know if I can help.” Although this is well-meaning, it is often quite hard for the depressed person to respond. However hard things get, it can be difficult for someone with depression to admit they’re struggling, let alone ask for help. Instead of making a vague offer of help, be specific. Say: “Would it help if I came over and cleaned your apartment,” or “Can I bring you some meals?” Better yet, don’t ask, just do it. Send them a care package, write them a letter showing your support or make yourself useful around the home.

Listen without judgment

Ultimately, your only responsibility to someone you love is to listen without judgment and often without giving advice. Whether you're a romantic partner, a close friend or a family member, your only job is to provide support and let your loved one feel heard. You can encourage your loved one to talk about their feelings by making eye contact, listen to what they're saying and don't interrupt them. This is one of the most powerful ways to show someone you care.

Remind them that it will pass

They might not believe you, but it still bears repeating: "This won't last." "You will feel better." They may be simple statements, but they might ignite the slightest spark of hope in someone who is depressed. If they need a little more convincing that their depression isn't permanent, do your research. Share stories and statistics about people who have recovered from depression, like this one: 80% of people who seek treatment for depression start to feel better within six weeks.

The symptoms of depression may never go away entirely, but there are plenty of ways to make a depressed person feel better, even in the short-term. Over time, these small things add up to make a world of difference, so don't give up.

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Knowing how to discipline a child without hitting or yelling is a vital part of a parent’s toolbox for child-raising. There are numerous approaches to disciplining kids, but not all are equal in the results they accomplish. Some methods are ineffective while others are dangerous. Some are positive and effective. Learning how to discipline a child without yelling or hitting will help foster a strong, close relationship between you and your children.

 The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends against these discipline tactics:

• Spanking
• Hitting
• Slapping
• Threatening
• Insulting
• Humiliating
• Shaming

Many well-meaning parents resort to the above techniques out of frustration over their child’s misbehavior because they don’t know what else they can do.  If that’s you or a friend or family member, you can reduce parenting stress by learning different discipline tools to replace mentally and physically damaging punishments.

Why You Shouldn’t Discipline a Child by Hitting or with Other Damaging Approaches

Parenting experts and organizations like the AAP state that physical (corporal), verbal, and emotional punishments should never be used. The reasons are sound. Hitting, spanking, yelling, and others listed above aren’t recommended because of their negative effects on kids.

Harsh punishments can cause physical injury and emotional harm. Kids learn to be afraid of their parents and that they must lie and avoid getting caught doing something they shouldn’t.

Hitting or spanking usually leads to aggression in kids and power struggles between parent and child. Hitting sends the wrong message to kids, teaching that hitting is okay when you’re upset. Further, they don’t learn positive skills they need to function at school and in society.  

Another devastating result of yelling at or hitting your child is the damage it does to your relationship with them. This type of punishment doesn’t foster closeness, affection, or trust. You can regain a positive relationship with your child when you know what to do instead of using harsh discipline.

Learn How to Discipline a Child without Hitting or Yelling

Knowing what to do instead of hitting and yelling is the key to more effective discipline and an improved relationship with your child. There are numerous ways to discipline without hitting or yelling. These effective approaches to positive discipline, when used consistently over time, will help your child be more cooperative:

Positive reinforcement. Positive reinforcement means seeing and acknowledging the good instead of waiting for misbehavior and punishing.

Redirecting. This involves diverting your child’s attention from something they shouldn’t be doing and steering them gently to something else.

Setting clear limits, boundaries, and rules. Kids need to know exactly what’s expected of them. They can’t follow rules or stick within limits if they don’t know what they are. If it is helpful, write them down and put them in a prominent spot.

Logical and natural consequences. In order to learn, kids must have clear and consistent consequences when they misbehave. When kids break a rule, follow through with a consequence right away so kids associate their behavior with the consequence. Also, consequences should be logical and fit the misdeed. Natural consequences are useful, too, because they let kids learn from their mistakes. For example, if your child left a book at home that he needs for school, you don’t have to rush it to them, nor do you have to yell at them when they come home. The natural consequence was not having the book to use.

Loss of privileges. Incorporating this tool into your clear discipline plan can be powerful in changing kids’ behaviors. Losing electronics for a day or the use of the car for a week impactfully teaches them not to repeat what they did.

Time Outs. Time outs aren’t for punishing. They’re to help kids calm down and reset. Whereas yelling and hitting evoke strong emotional reactions, time outs let kids cool down.

Ignore. You don’t have to call kids out for every little misdeed. When the transgression is minor, it’s okay to look the other way for the sake of maintaining a positive relationship.

Reward systems.  Young children love sticker charts. They earn stickers for being or doing good, and when they earn a set amount, you reward them. Similarly, older kids often respond to token economics in which they earn tokens and can exchange them for bigger rewards.

Perhaps the most important ingredient in disciplining without yelling or hitting is seeing the big picture. Rather than looking at short-term punishments for behavior you don’t want, think about their character as they grow up. What do you want them to learn, and how do you want them to learn it? These questions underlie all the techniques that replace harsh punishments. When they’re high-functioning adults, your kids will be grateful for you and the way you taught and guided them.

See Also:

• Disrespectful Child: What Kind of Discipline Should You Use?
• Ways to Discipline Ungrateful, Spoiled Children
• Is There Such Thing as a Bad Child?

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Having a boyfriend who is depressed and pushing you away can be hard on your self-esteem. Even though deep down you know your partner's illness is not your fault, it's difficult not to wonder if it's you or them when someone doesn't want your help – especially when that person is someone you love. If you find yourself in this predicament, you're probably wondering what to do. Should you let him withdraw from you and assume that's what he needs, or should you try to help, despite his protestations? Having a boyfriend who is depressed and pushing you away is no walk in the park, but there are some ways to make it easier on yourself.

Help! My Boyfriend Is Depressed and Pushing Me Away

If you’ve never been depressed, you might not know why your boyfriend is pushing you away. You may not understand his emotional struggles, and you might even worry that you’re somehow to blame.

Here’s the thing about depression: it is no one’s fault. It’s also no one’s job to make it better unless that person is a medical professional. If your boyfriend's behavior is getting you down, however, you may wonder whether you should even stay in the relationship. First, you need to understand why your boyfriend is pushing you away so that you can take the right course of action.

According to UK depression charity, Blurt, these are the main reasons why depressed people push others away:

• Lack of energy: Fatigue and lack of energy are symptomatic of depression, and some people find spending time with others too draining. This is not necessarily a reflection on your relationship; your boyfriend may just need a bit more time alone.
• Poor concentration: Depression can cause concentration levels to dip, leaving many people unable to follow a conversation.  
• Low tolerance: Depression doesn't just make people sad; it can also affect their tolerance levels and make them more irritable. During severe episodes of depression, some people need complete silence and tranquillity to heal.
• Feeling worthless: People with depression often isolate themselves from others because they don't feel valued. Your boyfriend might be pushing you away for fear of disappointing you or making you unhappy. The only way through this is to be honest with him about how you feel without attributing blame.  
• Fear of getting hurt: Sometimes, depression is so difficult to deal with anything else feels too scary. Your boyfriend may be pushing you away out of fear of rejection or abandonment.

The bottom line is this: depression is hard, and many people push others away because they find it easier to be alone.

What to Do If Your Depressed Partner Is Pushing You Away

When you have a cold or you’re sick, do you feel like socializing with others? Most likely, you prefer to spend time alone or in quiet companionship with someone you love, sleeping, reading or watching feel-good movies while you recover. Depression is no different, and the key to helping your boyfriend through this without letting him push you away is to figure out what he needs you to do differently.

Perhaps he needs someone to deliver a meal, or maybe he'd prefer to spend time with you without the expectation of a conversation or the need for entertainment. Perhaps he needs you to be there without trying to help him. Maybe he wants you to stop asking him how he's feeling, or maybe he wishes you would ask more questions. Don't assume anything – ask him to be honest with you and tell him you'll try your best to give him what he needs.

Depression is never a choice, so it must be treated with care and compassion. Chances are, your depressed boyfriend doesn't really want to push you away, he just doesn't know how to ask for what he needs from you.

See Also:

• What to Say to a Depressed Boyfriend, Girlfriend
• Loving Someone with Depression Comes with Challenges

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Do You Really Know How to Discipline Your Child?

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McCready, A. (n.d.). How to discipline your child: Top 3 positive parenting techniques. Positive Parenting Solutions. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.positiveparentingsolutions.com/parenting/how-to-discipline-your-child

WebMD Medical Reference. (2017.). Parents, kids, and discipline. WebMD. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.webmd.com/parenting/guide/discipline-tactics#1

How to Discipline a Child Without Hitting or Yelling

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Erwin, C. (n.d.). Discipline without yelling, hitting, or spanking. Positive Discipline. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.positivediscipline.com/articles/discipline-without-yelling-hitting-or-spanking  

Morin, A. (2016). 6 ways to discipline kids without yelling. verywell family. Retrieved June 2016 from https://www.verywellfamily.com/discipline-kids-without-yelling-1094746   

Morin, A. (2019). 8 ways to discipline your child without spanking. verywell family. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.verywellfamily.com/alternatives-to-spanking-1094834

Where we stand. (2018). American Academy of Pediatrics. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.healthychildren.org/English/family-life/family-dynamics/communication-discipline/pages/Where-We-Stand-Spanking.aspx  

Is There a Way to Discipline a Child Who Just Won’t Listen?

Brill, A. (2017). How to discipline a child that breaks the rules and doesn’t listen. Positive Parenting Connection. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.positiveparentingconnection.net/how-to-discipline-a-child-that-breaks-the-rules-and-doesnt-listen/

Devine, M. (n.d.). How to discipline your child: Effective Consequences for children who won’t listen. Empowering Parents.com. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.empoweringparents.com/article/how-to-discipline-your-child-effective-consequences-for-children-who-dont-listen/

Discipline: 5 Dos and Don’ts when your kids won’t listen. (2017.). Cleveland Clinic Health Essentials. Retrieved June 2018 from https://health.clevelandclinic.org/discipline-5-dos-and-donts-when-your-kids- wont-listen/

Parker, W. (2019). Correcting behavior in a child who won’t listen. verywell family. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.verywellfamily.com/child-discipline-101-kids-wont-listen-1270213

What Should You Do When Your Child Lies?

Lehman, J. (n.d.). Why kids tell lies and what to do about it. Empowering Parents. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.empoweringparents.com/article/why-kids-tell-lies-and-what-to-do-about-it/

Mason Martineau, M. (2017). What to do when my child lies? 13 ways to respond, prevent, and strengthen honest communication. Life. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.huffpost.com/entry/what-to-do-when-my-child_b_5355641

How to Discipline Your Child for Hitting Others

Hitting and spanking. (n.d.). Positive Discipline. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.positivediscipline.com/articles/hitting-and-spanking

Markham, L. (2013). 10 steps to stop your child from hitting other kids. Psychology Today. Retrieved June 2014 from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/peaceful-parents-happy-kids/201306/10-steps-stop-your-child-hitting-other-kids

Disrespectful Child: What Kind of Discipline Should You Use?

Disciplining your kids: Can laughter be a sign of defiance? (n.d.). Parenting Simply. Retrieved June 2019 from http://parentingsimply.com/disciplining-your-kids-can-laughter-be-a-sign-of-defiance/

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Embrett, C. (2002). How to deal with disrespectful behaviour. Today’s Parent. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.todaysparent.com/kids/preschool/how-to-deal-with-disrespectful-behaviour/

Herrington, M. (2018). Disciplining a disrespectful child doesn’t work, but this does. Working Mother. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.workingmother.com/disciplining-disrespect-doesnt-work-heres-what-does

Morin, A. (2019). 5 ways to handle disrespectful behavior from children. verywell family. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.verywellfamily.com/ways-to-deal-with-disrespectful-children-1094948

How Do You Discipline a Child for Misbehaving in School?

Banks, C. (n.d.). Problems at school? How to handle the top 4 issues. Empowering Parents.com. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.empoweringparents.com/article/problems-at-school-how-to-handle-the-top-4-issues/        

Lange, A. (n.d.). How to respond when your child gets in trouble at school. Organized Motherhood. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.organizedmotherhood.com/respond-child-gets-trouble-school/

Mauro, T. (2019). How to solve school behavior problems. verywell family. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.verywellfamily.com/five-ways-to-stop-school-behavior-problems-3105191

Ways to Discipline Ungrateful, Spoiled Children

Morin, A. (2018). Parenting tips to improve the attitudes of ungrateful children. verywell family. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.verywellfamily.com/strategies-to-address-an-ungrateful-child-1094964

Morin, A. (2018). Why you shouldn’t indulge your child. verywell family. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.verywellfamily.com/why-you-shouldnt-overindulge-your-child-1094827

Shaw, G. (2012). Is your child spoiled? WebMD. Retrieved June 2019 from https://www.webmd.com/parenting/features/spoiled-child#1  

How Should You Discipline a Depressed Teenager?

Emanuele, J. (n.d.). Should parents force kids with depression to do things they don’t want to do? Child Mind Institute. Retrieved June 2019 from https://childmind.org/ask-an-expert-qa/should-parents-force-kids-with-depression-to-do-things-they-dont-want-to-do/

Kids and depression: How have we come to this? ChildrensMD: Mom Docs. Retrieved June 2019 from https://childrensmd.org/browse-by-age-group/kids-and-depression-how-have-we-come-to-this/

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Conduct Disorder Interventions Help

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Depression after sex can be confusing. Aren’t you meant to feel great after a night with your partner or someone you like? You enjoyed yourself in the moment, so why are you suddenly tearful, sad and empty? The answer is more straightforward than you might expect. Although we only ever see people looking tired and happy after sex in the movies, this isn't the reality for many of us. So why does depression after sex happen, and is there a way to prevent it?

Depression After Sex: Why Does It Happen?

Depression after sex is surprisingly common, even in consensual scenarios where both partners have enjoyed the act itself. This condition is scientifically recognized as post-coital dysphoria (PCD), or post-coital tristesse. These are the terms used to describe feeling sad, anxious, aggressive or melancholic after sex. So why does this happen?

According to Denise Knowles, a sex therapist at UK relationships charity, Relate, depression after sex comes down to the combinations of hormones in the body after sex, including endorphins, oxytocin and prolactin. She explains:

"Having sex is a hugely intimate act, and an orgasm releases lots of wonderful feel-good bonding hormones. Those hormones drop following the peak of an orgasm, and as you separate from the closeness that brought it about, a sense of sadness can follow.”

What this doesn't explain is why some people experience depression after sex while others don't. In some cases, depression after sex may be linked to an obvious cause – such as past trauma or sexual abuse – but this isn't always the case. Many people in happy relationships or with fulfilling sex lives suffer feelings of depression after sex with no ideas of the root cause. There is, however, a body of research that suggests certain people are more biologically prone to PCD, just as some individuals are more at risk of developing depression than others.

Tips to Minimize Depression After Sex

If the reasons for depression after sex are purely biological, there may be little you can do to stop the onset of PCD entirely. However, there are ways you can lessen the effect of depression after sex.

Be honest with your partner(s)

If you know you are susceptible to PCD, tell your sexual partner(s), so they know what to expect. Being honest will alleviate some of your anxiety about how new partners might respond, and it will also take away some of the depression's power.

Remind yourself that it will fade

In most cases, depression after sex is temporary, even though it feels all-consuming in the moment. Remind yourself that there is a scientific reason why you feel like this, don’t take yourself too seriously, and know that this feeling will fade.

Get good at knowing what you need

What do you need most when PCD takes hold? Perhaps you need time alone to reflect, or maybe you want to be close to someone? Whether it's a hot cup of tea, a favorite song or a walk in the fresh air, find something that uplifts you when depression strikes, and be sure to take care of yourself after you have sex. If you know what you need in this scenario, you'll also be able to communicate this to your partner(s), which will make it easier for them to help you.

Avoid sex that makes you feel bad

For many people, depression after sex is no reflection on their relationship status or how much they enjoyed (or didn't enjoy) the act itself. However, PCD can be intensified in situations where you feel vulnerable or uncomfortable in some way. Before you become intimate with someone, even if it's your long-term partner or spouse, ask yourself if you really want to have sex. If you sleep with someone out of obligation, or because you're pressured into it, you are bound to feel worse than if you'd truly listened to your body and mind.

People may not talk much about depression after sex, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t happening. If you think you’re experiencing symptoms of PCD, talk to your doctor about possible treatment options, and consider seeing a sex therapist to rule out underlying psychological factors.

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