Wanting to Give Up on Everything After Abusive Relationships

October 6, 2022 Cheryl Wozny

When you are the victim of verbal abuse, making decisions and navigating everyday activities can be overwhelming. I have noticed that when my anxiety levels climb due to external stressors, my brain and body want to shut down. Then, I want to return to my old coping skills from when I suffered abuse by giving up, abstaining from fighting against any opposition, and retreating internally. 

Of course, this isn't always the case, but I do notice it is more prevalent when I disagree with someone, when I am trying to complete a task that seems unattainable, or when I am facing extreme obstacles in my daily life. Thankfully, recognizing these emotions before they get too much to bear helps me heal from my past trauma. 

Giving Up Can Be Difficult to Understand 

Unfortunately, it can be highly confusing if you know someone who reaches the point of mental exhaustion and wants to give up. Lately, I have been dealing with multiple mental and physical health issues that are exceptionally draining on me and those in my life. Some days, I don't want to talk about it or think of new ways to seek the support I should be getting. 

I have some terrific people around me who are encouraging, supportive, and want to help. However, they are on the outside looking in, coming up with terrific ideas for things I can do or avenues to explore for assistance. Lately, in my daily life, I struggle with completing mundane tasks, and even small jobs can be exhausting, leaving me with no motivation to continue seeking support. 

Don't Give Up on Us 

Although it can be hard to watch a friend or family member retreat and give up on their drive to find support or assistance, it's vital that you don't give up on them when you're on the outside looking in. Although verbal abuse victims like myself do not always have the energy to fight the good fight and be productive, I've found that knowing someone supportive is behind us helps bring back our motivation. 

Keeping in contact with your friend or family member who is struggling can make all the difference in the world. Regular text messages or phone calls can help solidify the idea that they are never alone, even when they want to shut down and ignore everything.  

Remember, it is completely normal if you feel like you need to take a step away from everything to regroup and find your inner strength to carry on. However, you must find the resources you need to help deal with external stressors so you can continue to work on healing through your journey to better health. 

Tags: give up

APA Reference
Wozny, C. (2022, October 6). Wanting to Give Up on Everything After Abusive Relationships, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2024, July 21 from

Author: Cheryl Wozny

Cheryl Wozny is a freelance writer and published author of several books, including mental health resources for children titled, Why Is My Mommy So Sad? and Why is My Daddy So Sick? Writing has become her way of healing and helping others. Find Cheryl on TwitterInstagramFacebook, and her blog

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