Then on January 1 1999 I sent out the following follow up:
"To my friends in cyberspace,
On December 7, I sent an e-mail to you proclaiming my Joy and Gratitude at the way my path was unfolding.
I am sending this message today, New Years Day 1999, to let you know that the Joy, Love, and gratitude that I was feeling that day now seems almost primitive compared to the levels I have accessed since then. Here is what I wrote in my snail mail mailing that I am sending out here in California.
"1998 has been a very interesting year for me. Lots of opportunities for growth and learning. Lots of chances to practice acceptance, patience, faith and all those other wonderful Spiritual Principles that have made it possible for me to have Peace and Joy in my life no matter what was happening on the outside. Early summer was especially painful as what seemed to be an opportunity to publish my next books evaporated in a slow painful way - but gave lots of opportunity to practice Letting Go. I moved back to the Central Coast (Morro Bay) in early fall and am very happy I did as this area feels much more like home to me. I am still going to Santa Barbara once a week to see clients - but am not sure at this point if that is going to be financially viable for much longer.
The past few months have seen some Truly amazing and wondrous changes in my life. In November I was feeling very blessed with the level of freedom I had attained to feel happy, Joyous, & peaceful in the moment no matter what the outer conditions. In December, years of work came to critical mass and I made a leap into hyperspace that opened my heart in a Truly amazing way. A paradigm shift occurred in my relationship with being in body on this physical plane that has unleashed an incredible flow of energy - either that or I am having a psychotic break. Whatever is happening, I LOVE being so ALIVE. 1999 is going to be an incredible, Magical, Joy filled year. Catch me while you can - my life has just started soaring."
There are not words to express to you how incredible and amazing the process is that I experienced in this last month. I am passionately ALIVE in a way that I could never have imagined. And I am not involved in the romantic relationship that I thought was developing on December 7th. The woman who I stated in that e-mail might be my dream woman, my twin soul - maybe is not.
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The way things unfolded was that she got scared that maybe she was repeating an old pattern and decided she needed to pull back. So now we are friends and may never be anything 'else' than that - (I first wrote 'more than that' and needed to change it because that seemed somehow to diminish the value of friendship as if there were something wrong with it not being 'more' - probably has to do with old tapes / dysfunctional cultural standards.) It is a really wonderful magical emotionally intimate relationship that I have gotten the gift of learning some absolutely magnificent lessons from - about letting go of what I wanted it to be for one thing.
There have been quite a few absolutely magnificent lessons that I have learned because of my interaction with this amazing being who I have been blessed to have come into my life as an angel and teacher and buddy - but probably the most important one has to do with Love - since Love and learning the True meaning of Love, is really what the path is all about.
I had the honor of being asked to write something to speak at a wedding yesterday (New Years Eve) which of course was a perfect part of my Spiritual adventure - this incredibly intricate and magnificent plan / process that is unfolding.
I got to speak there, in what I wrote, about the new level of understanding - gut level understanding instead of just theoretical - that my amazing friend has helped me to experience. Here are a few short excerpts from that wedding prayer that I wrote with the parts I am specifically referring to here in bold. (I think that this wedding prayer may be one of the most beautiful things I have ever written - I am very pleased with it.)
"You are together because you resonate on the same wave lengths, you fit together vibrationally, in such a way that together you form a powerful energy field that helps both of you access the Higher Vibrational Energy of Love, Joy, Light, and Truth - in a way that would be very difficult for either one of you to do by yourself. You are coming together to touch the face of God. You are uniting your energies to help you access the Love of the Holy Mother Source Energy.
You are not the source of each other's Love. You are helping each other to access the LOVE that is the Source.
The Love that you see when you see your soul in the others eyes is a reflection of the LOVE that you are. Of the Unconditional Love that the Great Spirit feels for you.
It is very important to remember that the other person is helping you to access God's LOVE within you - not giving you something that you have never had before."
"The Abundance of Love and Joy that you can help each other to feel by coming together - are vibrational levels that you then each will be able to access within yourself. You are helping each other to remember how to access that Love - helping each other to remember what it feels like and that Yes you do deserve it.
It is very important to remember that so that you can Let Go. Let Go of believing that the other person has to be in your life . . . ."
Staff, H. (2009, January 5). Romance, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2021, December 2 from https://www.healthyplace.com/relationships/joy2meu/romance