Schizophrenia and Relationships: What You Need to Know
Relationships with schizophrenia are complicated. When I was diagnosed with schizophrenia, a lot of things suddenly made sense and a lot of things were instantly out of place. For instance, my relationship with friends and family got complicated. As first, I didn't know if I should tell them. I was afraid of how they might react. The same was true for meeting new people. When do I tell them? Should I tell them? What if I scare them away? The word "schizophrenia" carries a stigma after all. Stacked on top of this was the fact that I have always been more of an introvert by nature. Being told I was schizophrenic didn't help. Instead, it became a justification for me to withdraw and refrain from being social. My relationships have been altered by my schizophrenia.
I'm better about it now.
Understanding what's happening and why and having the unconditional love and support of my family, really gave me the courage to get over everything and be really open about it. As it turns out, I am not alone. If you have been diagnosed, or know someone who is schizophrenic, the following might help helpful.
Studying the Facts About Relationships and Schizophrenia
You see, I happen to be one of 2.2 million adults who suffer with this brain disorder. That means I am one part of a large number of people who at times experience these schizophrenia symptoms:
- Cannot easily distinguish what's real from what is fantasy
- Have trouble managing their emotions
- Find it hard to make decisions
- Have a hard time thinking clearly
- Find it generally difficult to relate to people
And yes, while it can be debilitating, schizophrenia is treatable. I have found that I can manage schizophrenia best with the support of my doctor, friends and family. Nurture relieves the pressure and stigma attached to the disorder.
At the time of my diagnosis of schizophrenia, I was also in a relationship. My girlfriend at the time didn’t understand what was happening to me. So, this encouraged me to find out more about how schizophrenia generally affects relationships and actually write about it.
My girlfriend didn’t understand why I seemed to become more and more antisocial.
Social Skills Relationships and Schizophrenia
The first thing you must understand is that schizophrenia drastically affects our social skills.
- We become introverted to the point where we would rather not speak to anyone.
- We could notice extreme changes in our behavior. (For instance, we might have trouble with everyday tasks like bathing and dressing.)
- We can be very irritable at times.
- We lack motivation with no reason attached.
- Sometimes we experience hallucinations or delusions
While my relationship ended after a while – probably because I was too young at the time – the fact that she stayed around helped a lot. I cannot really imagine what it must feel like to be the partner in a relationship with a schizophrenic.
However, if you are that person, then you need to understand what helped me and probably my girlfriend, too, was to communicate openly, to share and express our feelings and to make sure our mental health was as balanced as possible.
While it can be challenging to be in a relationship with someone who is very unpredictable, and, at times, unstable, many schizophrenics, such as the brilliant Elyn Saks, have held loving long-term relationships.
Relationships with Schizophrenia Are Possible
Don't let schizophrenia wilt your existing relationships or keep you from pursuing new ones. It doesn't have to. There are many examples and great resources available to help you on your journey. So long as you are willing to put in the work and accept help when offered, you have nothing to fear.
This post was written by:
Mike Jones is a blogger and healthy living promoter. His own struggles have ignited the spark to move past negative diagnostics, stigma, and rejection and focus on natural remedies and a great fitness routine. To learn more about the condition affecting not only his mental health but each and every relationship he had, Mike put together SchizLife.com. Find Mike on Twitter.
To be a guest author on the Your Mental Health Blog, go here.
Author, G. (2017, July 18). Schizophrenia and Relationships: What You Need to Know, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2019, September 14 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/yourmentalhealth/2017/07/schizophrenia-and-relationships-what-you-need-to-know
Author: Guest Author
I have dated him for 4 years and a year ago, he became very different. He will ask me to not stay in short shorts around the house because people might see me from the outside or he often would look in the window if there's somebody.
He watched conspiracy theories and believed in all of them, when the solar eclipse happened, he said its the end of the world. He started to believe there's no sun and the government tries to lie us.
He says, people are watching or recording him. He thinks people are making fun of him.
He says for a lot of people that they are gay or lesbians including me.
There was a show we watched together, it was called ' The Truman Show' and he said he is the caracter of that movie and how his life its a show and people watch it.
While we were together, he stopped having intimacy with me and his reason was he wants now to wait until we are married.
After a while he broke up with me because he said we are all brothers and sisters and relationships are against God. He said, he wants to be like mother Theresa and Jesus, not married or in a relationship. Later he says, he was trying to figure it out if that's true. Then he changed the reason of our break up, he said that Im insecure and jealous and I need to work on these in order to be back together, but in meantime he found a new girl while we lived together. We were still sharing the bed and living a life completely together. He wouldn't care to come home with all bite bruises from his new girl. He would often judge me even if I itched my nose he thought I am giving signals to people, they way he acts towards me is as he hates me but he says he loves everyone. He started to have very much interest in religion and he put stickers in his car about God. In social media, he makes posts of motivation and tells to everyone he loves them and they are beautiful while with me he is terrible and mean. He also was controlling, he didn't want me to wear tight clothes and open ones.
He left to many jobs and starts a new one, in the time he kicked me out from our apartment, I was the only one working and paying bills. He tells me, his new girl likes me and she is lesbian, then later he told me he was saying that to make me upset. His behavior it's very confusing and I don't understand what is wrong with him.
I hope someone could help me understand
I don’t believe that your ex-boyfriend has schizophrenia. I’m no medical doctor, however, I do think that he may have borderline personality disorders (BPD). Symptoms include paranoia, emotional detachment (including from himself), confusion, impulsive behaviour and contradictory feelings such as his drastic shift on his beliefs on sex, telling you that he loves you then shortly after degrading and portraying intense negative feelings towards you etc. He also displays intense, short-term anxiety, hostility, irritability, insecurities and identity issues. People with borderline personality disorders are often in poor, Intense, and unstable abusive relationships. The fact that he admitted to lying about his girlfriend liking you may be indicative of his fear of being abandoned in the sense that he may be trying to put in the effort to not lose you or he may simply fear loosing both you and his girlfriend to each other. Feeling rejected, neglected and relationship conflicts can trigger fear of abandonment. This results in the individual with BPD creating a negative perception of the other person, fighting and sometimes begging and threatening self-harm.
He to is getting in to things he will laugh with him self just out the blue and make a very big mess.
There is much more that is being done like he says he loves me and then the next min.he dosent even talk whith me or even know i am there and he becomes distance from me and shows signs like he dont care about us .
Well with that being said i do t have to put up with it but i do love him and i know even if he says (no) that he needs me so i stay with him and help him the best way i can and what i do with my boyfriend that helps him and i about his issues is i tell him i am in love with him exactly how he is and for him not to change to be him self and that I will be here for him no matter what.
There is one thing that i do know is they are already feeling bad when they can't even control the things that they do and they tell you that they are really trying,but to the other person it looks like they are doing the things on purpose and they really not
What I do is say I love you and i am very proud that you are trying and it helps me out little by little you will see a difference it just takes time and time is mostly all I have now well that is all I can tell you on what helps me