You Don't Know My Binge Eating Disorder
I find it annoying to no end when someone thinks they know my binge eating disorder, all by looking at my body, seeing me eat, or reading a blog article about my struggles. It never fails that someone gains a superficial amount of knowledge about me and decides that they know everything there is to know about me and my binge eating disorder. It would be wonderful if we could know all there is to know about a person based off of a few facts about them, but we can't. No one can. No one knows someone else's entire history based off of a few interactions with them.
You Don't Know My Binge Eating Disorder Because You've Seen the Size Of My Thighs
Trust me, you don't know my binge eating disorder because you've seen my body. I've been a size 10 in my life and I've been a size 24. Both of those sizes were a result of my eating disorder. It never fails to amaze me how many people were rushing to validate me and congratulate me on what I looked liked when I was starving myself down to a smaller size.
Toward the end, when I even realized just how sick I was, I wanted to ask them how they could say I was healthy when I was living off of Dr. Pepper and water. On the other end of the spectrum, I got comments about my body when I was heavier and was often told how tired and how much older I looked. For some reason, my starvation was acceptable because I was getting smaller. My binging was bad, only because it made me larger.
You Don't Know My Binge Eating Disorder Because You've Seen Me Eat
No, really, you don't know my binge eating disorder because you've watched me eat a meal. I've heard people commend me for eating so little and then criticize me for eating too much cheese even though I eat small meals and stick to my gastric sleeve weight loss surgery diet given to me by my doctor. People are ready to validate or invalidate what I eat as if they know my history, they know my body, and I came to them asking for medical advice.
You Don't Know My Binge Eating Disorder Because You've Read an Article
So I told you one thing about my binge eating disorder, that doesn't mean you know my binge eating disorder. It's strange when someone I'm acquaintances with tells me that they've read a single blog article on my binge eating disorder and now they completely understand everything I've gone through. My experience is too complex and extensive for it to be distilled into a few hundred words. It really trivializes everything I've been through to think that you know me and my disorder all through one post.
So How Can You Know My Binge Eating Disorder?
There are lots of ways in which you can't know my binge eating disorder, but what are some ways which you can?
- Don't think that you can ever know everything about my binge eating disorder: I don't know everything about it.
- Let me tell my story in my own time: I might not feel comfortable telling you everything at once, particularly painful parts at all. Let me work at my own pace to share with you what I feel ready to when I do.
- Don't assume that you can give me advice after hearing my story: That article you saw in a magazine about how to decrease hunger? Keep it to yourself. I get diet and food advice from everyone in the world. I don't need it from yet another person.
- Get to know me, not just my disorder: Binge eating disorder can be a big part of your life, but it's not the only part. So ask me about other things as well, not just my struggles.
Lots of people think they know about your binge eating disorder based on very superficial things. But knowing someone is a difficult and complex process that is always changing. Whether or not you have an eating disorder, you should always be respectful of other people's struggles and triumphs in life. They will always be different and always go deeper than what that person looks like.
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LaBranche, S. (2015, August 6). You Don't Know My Binge Eating Disorder, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2023, March 21 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/bingeeatingrecovery/2015/08/you-dont-know-my-binge-eating-disorder
Author: Star LaBranche
I've suffered with different types of weight issues/eating disorders most of my life. My weight has been as low as 145 and as high as 304.
Recently an exercise coach told me
"Know that being active is a challenge for a lot of people-you are not alone. It costs the Canadian taxpayers $6.8 billion"
Does she honestly think that shaming me and making me feel guilty for costing the tax payer is motivating me to do better? Really?