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As I sit down to reflect on the therapeutic power of spring cleaning and self-esteem, I am drawn into a journey of self-discovery and personal growth. Growing up, I never realized the profound impact that tidying my space could have on my mental wellbeing and self-esteem. However, as I have navigated through life's challenges, I have gradually uncovered the transformative effects of decluttering and organizing my surroundings. In short, your self-esteem can be affected by spring cleaning.
Early this week at my meeting, we shared some of the toughest hurdles we've faced on our journey to gambling addiction recovery, and I couldn't help but notice that budgeting and debt managing emerged as a key theme. It's difficult to dig yourself out of debt and regain financial stability, especially if you don't know much about finance management. There are also limited resources on the topic aimed at recovering gamblers. This inspired me to delve deeper into the topic, as rebuilding finances was also one of my biggest challenges on my journey to recovery.
Handling others' reactions to verbal abuse can be challenging. Managing a verbally abusive relationship is difficult, especially when an outsider provides their opinion on the situation. Listening to reactions from others dismissing the severity of the problem can cause feelings of anger and resentment. Someone who is the regular target of verbal abuse may seek out support from others only to face avoidance or skepticism.
Life has changed drastically since the COVID-19 pandemic; it's why the term "new normal" was used to describe the post-pandemic world. From work and education to social interactions and healthcare, virtually every aspect of life was affected. Although the World Health Organization declared the end of COVID-19 as a public health emergency on May 11, 20231, many of these aspects never returned to normal. In fact, the disease is around to date, which is why some people still wear masks in public spaces. Since the world went into survival mode for a couple of years, we didn't have time to process the monumental changes we were going through. But now that we are no longer in a crisis, I wonder if we have mentally adjusted to the new normal.
I've found that self-care for premenstrual syndrome is critical. Hormonal changes from premenstrual syndrome (PMS) cause me to feel tired, bloated, sore, depressed, and sometimes angry. There are days when I can barely get out of bed. During this time, I feel guilty for not being productive. However, to manage, it is important to be kind to myself and practice self-care for PMS symptoms. Here are six ways I take care of myself during my period.
Improving interpersonal communication with borderline personality disorder (BPD) can be a lifelong task. For me, interpersonal communication with BPD becomes a battleground where the stakes are high. One misstep could lead to unintended consequences, exacerbating my BPD symptoms.
Learning to trust yourself after trauma can feel like walking through a minefield. In my experience, if I take one wrong step, I fear my entire life will somehow implode. Even the most minor decisions send me into a fight-or-flight spiral. I deny my intuition and operate out of fear, craving a sense of security and certainty one simply cannot have in life. Learning to trust myself after trauma has been difficult.
Looking for a new job is never easy, but depression while job hunting is even worse. Being unemployed at the same time is terrible, too. Unfortunately, I have experienced that in the last couple of years. Getting lost in the cumbersome tasks of revamping my resume and applying for jobs is dispiriting. Thus, it becomes easy for job hunting to cause my depression to set in quickly.
It took me several years of personal growth and cultural awareness to realize there are systemic barriers to eating disorder treatment. My battle with anorexia was painful and tumultuous, but access to therapeutic interventions made the healing journey feel possible. While I am immensely grateful for this, I also cannot brush aside the conspicuous reality that certain prohibitive eating disorder treatment barriers still exist.
Unfortunately, retail and service workers are often the target of verbal abuse. No one deserves to be called names, insulted, or threatened, especially while doing their job. Sadly, verbal abuse in retail and service professions is becoming more frequent in many restaurants and stores.
First of all, thank you for sharing your story. You are a very caring person, and I commend you for, as Tammy Wynette sings, "Stand(ing) by your man." That aside, I wholeheartedly agree with you that those living with depression may seem selfish to someone on the outside. Still, in reality, they (me also being one of them) think our loved ones would be better off without us around because of our depression. We think we are doing our loved ones a favor by leaving. Depression causes our brains to work in different ways, causing us to think distortedly -- so no, we are not purposefully being selfish. Thank you for seeing that with your loved one and not allowing someone else to convince you otherwise.
Well, eventually, the depression demons took hold and he told me on August 5th 2023 that he decided he wanted to just move to MT and isolate himself from everyone. He had been offered a free place to stay if he did some maintenance. He is very handy and that type of situation was very ideal because it was flexible; he only worked on things on the days he was physically up to it.
We talked every night like "normal" up until he left on April 14th 2023. We had a long distance relationship then and so I didnt get to see him in person often and didnt see him that last week. He told me one last time that he loved me and he was sorry to hurt me and I have not heard from him since. He didnt even tell his parents or sister he was leaving.
I still love him as much as I ever have even though it has been over a year since we last spoke. I just had dinner with a close friend who was always very critical of him because often he would have to cancel plans last minute due to the Crohn's or because he would go dark for weeks at a time. She told me tonight that he is a selfish person and that if he truly loved me he would have gotten help for the depression. Oddly, she has been depressed before and suicidal which you would think would make her more understanding. I asked her if when she contiplated suicide was she selfish? She said yes. I said but are you a selfish person and she said no. I said that was the same for him. Sure him leaving me and his family was "selfish" but at his core, is he selfish? Absolutely not. She thinks because she was able to conquer her depression that if he really loved me, he would have fought his depression. It makes me sad to think she cant see the amazing guy that is buried under the depression. I know, without a doubt, if he did get a handle on the depression, that he would NOT be selfish at all. It is hard to understand why others cant see the true person under the depression.
I hope those that are struggling know that not everyone will abandon you in your time of suffering. There are people out there that see the real you and would do anything to help.
I encourage all those suffering from depression to not only tell your loved ones what you are going through, but also to seek professional help. And for those of you who love a person suffering from depression, have compassion and understanding for their struggle. Know they do not intentionally hurt you and deep down they still love you even if they cant show it.
Thanks for reading.
p.s. I also struggle with depression and anxiety but I did get help and between medication and coping techniques, I am able to be myself again.
From the story you told, it sounds like you know when your partner's alters switch.
I'm sorry this was written in the first/second person. But maybe apply this to your situation with a grain of salt.