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Top 10 Myths About Lesbians

Here are myths regarding lesbians. We're also providing accurate information under each myth about lesbians. Just as with any group of people, preconceived notions exist about lesbians and are generally incorrect.

Myths About Lesbians

1. All lesbians hate men.

Fact: It's a myth that all lebsians hate men. The fact that a woman is sexually and emotionally attracted to another woman has absolutely nothing to do with men. Most lesbians carry on long-lasting and emotionally satisfying friendships with men.

2. Some lesbians want to be men.

Fact: Lesbians who appear more masculine do so for fashion or comfort. There is a wide variety of gender expression in both men and women regardless of sexual orientation. A person seeking to change their sex is called a transsexual.

3. You can't know if you are a lesbian unless you sleep with a woman.

Fact: This myth about lesbains is simply untrue. You do not have to sleep with someone in order to know you are attracted to them. The same holds true for heterosexuals. Discovering your sexuality is not about sleeping with someone.

4. Lesbians are attracted to all women.

Fact: If a person is attracted to one specific gender this does not mean that they are attracted to all members of that gender. This is true for both men and women, regardless of which gender they are attracted to.

5. Being a lesbian is a choice and can be changed.

More and more studies are finding that sexual orientation is not something chosen, rather it's an inborn trait found in most animal species. There is plenty of evidence that therapy and counseling to "make someone straight" is ineffective.

6. Lesbian relationships are all about sex.

Fact: Sex is an important aspect of any healthy relationship, but not the only aspect. Lesbians connect on an emotional and spiritual level, and like heterosexual couples can choose whether or not to have families and children. (Kids with Lesbian Parents Do Just Fine) Sex has nothing to do with this aspect of the relationship. (Info on lesbian sexual health)

7. Lesbians just haven't met the right man yet.

Lesbianism has nothing to do with men, many lesbians have not met the right woman yet, but again it has nothing to do with men.

8. You can tell a lesbian by how she looks.

Fact: Some homosexuals claim to have what is referred to as "gaydar". This is nothing more than an intuition regarding another persons' sexuality. Based on the fact that some people are still in the closet, there is really no way to know this.

9. One lesbian in the relationship has to be "the man".

Fact: While there are lesbian couples that are butch/femme, both partners are clearly women. Butch/femme is not the only kind of relationship for lesbians, but most women may prefer no kind of labeling at all as this generalizes them.

10. Lesbians can't be spiritual.

Fact: While some denominations consider homosexuality a sin, there are many faiths and churches that accept all humans regardless of any differences. Spirituality is a personal belief system that has nothing to do with organized practices or sexual preferences.

These myths about lesbians are just that - myths. As with any genre of myths, there's the appearance of truth and so some people believe them. Now that you have the facts about these lesbian myths, you can debunk them the next time you hear someone repeat them.

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next: Coming Out Lesbian
~ all lesbian articles
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Last Updated: 14 March 2016
Reviewed by Harry Croft, MD

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