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Living with the Uncertainties of Bipolar Disorder

Living with the Uncertainties of Bipolar Disorder

Living with bipolar disorder creates uncertainty. You never know when depression, mania or hypomania may strike. Can you deal with the uncertainties of bipolar?Living with bipolar disorder is chock full of uncertainty. You never know when you might be well. You never know when you might be acutely depressed. You never know when mania might make you psychotic. And you never know when it might be the day when you need the hospital. If that isn’t uncertainty, I don’t know what it. And while everyone lives with uncertainty, the uncertainties that come with bipolar disorder are so very hard to live with.

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Bipolar Depression – I Don’t Want Anything

Bipolar Depression – I Don’t Want Anything

Not wanting anything in bipolar depression is very hard and hard to identify with, Watch this video to see what it's like to not even want to see your friends.It’s hard for non-bipolar people to identify with this, but when I have bipolar depression, I don’t want anything. It doesn’t matter what it is, it doesn’t matter how I used to feel about it, it doesn’t matter how good an idea it seems, I just don’t want it with bipolar depression, and that’s it.

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Bipolar and Physical Hypersensitivity: Washing My Hands Hurts

Bipolar and Physical Hypersensitivity: Washing My Hands Hurts

When the pain is at its worst, it feels like bipolar and hypersensitivity go hand in hand. It’s like when you get the flu and every little touch hurts. That’s physical hypersensitivity. And I don’t know why I get it but I assume it’s part of the neuropathic pain or exaggerated pain that some with bipolar experience. Long story short, it hurts to even wash my hands because of my bipolar-caused hypersensitivity.

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Why Bipolar Mood Instability Happens During the Holidays

Why Bipolar Mood Instability Happens During the Holidays

Many people can find enjoying the holidays challenging, but for those with bipolar disorder, the holidays can also cause bipolar mood instability. This is a special challenge over and above what the average person faces. While average people may worry about seeing a brother who hates them or an alcoholic aunt who is a mess, people with bipolar disorder risk a bipolar relapse. Here are some of the reasons why the holidays cause bipolar mood instability for those with bipolar disorder.

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Dissociation Because of the Pain of Bipolar Disorder

Dissociation Because of the Pain of Bipolar Disorder

I dissociate when the pain of bipolar disorder becomes too severe. It happened to be just last night, in fact. I was wailing out into the night about the pain and suffering and willing it all to end (Losing a Battle with My Bipolar Brain), knowing that it wouldn’t, so I just dissociated. I separated from the world. My brain and mind walked away from each other. The pain of bipolar disorder forced me to dissociate for my own good.

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Depression – I Can’t Enjoy the Good Things

Depression – I Can’t Enjoy the Good Things

I love good things theoretically, but with depression, I can’t enjoy the good things. Most people don’t get this. Most people can’t conceptualize of this. But even when good (recently great) life events occur, I just don’t feel pleasure (Depression Is Not Sadness). I can’t enjoy the good things when I’m depressed.

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Bipolar Disorder Guilt and Sunny Days

Bipolar Disorder Guilt and Sunny Days

Because of the chronic mental illness of bipolar disorder, I have guilt on sunny days; and this really sucks seeing as we’re now into summer. I know this might sound weird to your average person, but I actually prefer a rainy day to a sunny one. Rainy days don’t bring about guilt. Sunny days bring about my bipolar guilt.

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Getting Things Done with Depression: Finding Brain Space

Getting Things Done with Depression: Finding Brain Space

Getting things done when you’re depressed isn’t just about finding time. Getting things done with depression is also about finding brain space. Brain space, for me, is the biggest limiter of my functionality in bipolar (at least partially because I’m a writer). It feels like my brain gets “full’ and then I can’t do anything because I can’t think. Or I can’t handle thinking. Or thinking causes such anxiety that I’m frozen. This brain space limits me getting things done when depressed.

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So What If a Suicide Attempt Is a ‘Cry for Attention?’

So What If a Suicide Attempt Is a ‘Cry for Attention?’

There is a notion out there that a suicide attempt is a “cry for attention” and, thus, this invalidates what the person has done or makes it “not serious” (The Stigma Of Suicide). I would beg to differ. First off, of course, many suicide attempts have nothing to do with “attention,” per se, but secondly, so what if it did? So what if a suicide attempt is a cry for attention? Why does that make it less serious?

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Depression, Bipolar Depression Amplifies Physical Pain

Depression, Bipolar Depression Amplifies Physical Pain

I have found that depression, in my case bipolar depression, amplifies physical pain (Mental Illness Means Physical Pain Too). Yes, depression brings about its own pain, to be sure, but additional to that, I believe depression amplifies the physical pain we already feel in our normal, daily lives. Stubbing your toe hurts, but stubbing you toe with serious depression feels like it could kill you.

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