how to have good sex
Pop His Cork
Try the oral sex technique that I call The Screw. As you're moving up his shaft with your mouth, turn your head a bit from side to side, letting your tongue follow a corkscrew pattern. When you get to the frenulum - that part of the shaft just beneath the head - be sure to lick it for a few seconds before moving all the way up to the top. Then repeat, moving down his shaft. What will drive him wild about this is that you aren't just going up and down - you're also going sideways. It's 3-D!
-Paul Joannides, author of The Guide to Getting It On
Let Go - Loudly!
When you're sexually excited, really express yourself. Let yourself go in whatever way feels most comfortable. Scream your head off, laugh, shout his name - whatever you have the urge to do. If you're embarrassed, just know that you're doing your partner a favor. The more you express your pleasure, the more you make him feel like the stud of the universe. Bonus: Your orgasms will be even more powerful if you really let 'er rip vocally.
-Dr. Susan Block, author of The 10 Commandments of Pleasure: Erotic Keys to a Healthy Sexual Life
Toy With Him
Stock up on some sex toys. Velvet-lined handcuffs can be exciting, and they don't hurt like the metal ones do. Silk blindfolds build a sense of suspense - which can be really titillating. And you can never go wrong with a vibrator. Ask him to buzz it against your clitoris or tell him simply to sit back and watch you handle it. It will feel amazing for you, and he'll be turned on just by seeing you so turned on.
-Dr. Susan Block
Eyes Wide Open
Don't close your eyes during sex. This is a great way to explore more of the emotional side of intercourse. Start by kissing with your eyes open and looking at each other during foreplay. Gradually build up until you can sustain eye contact throughout both of your climaxes. You'll experience your orgasm in a totally different way. It's a revelation.
-Barbara Keesling, author of Discover Your Sensual Potential: A Woman's Guide to Guaranteed Satisfaction
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Before giving him oral sex, position yourself so you're sitting to the side, almost perpendicular to his penis. Cup your hand around his member, creating a "bun" around his "hot dog." Then kiss the part of his penis that's exposed while breathing hard. Your hand will trap your exhalations and make his member feel superhot. With your other hand, work his testicles. He'll think he has died and gone to heaven.
Face his legs instead of his face when you're on top. (Hold on to his feet for balance.) He'll get a great view of your backside - a surefire turn-on. And if his erection points out instead of up, this position will feel especially incredible to him.
The Kiss Connection
Share a passionate 10-second kiss every single day. A lot of couples keep having sex but stop really kissing. And that's a shame, because it's such a wonderful, intimate act. So just go up and lay one on him. Instantly, you'll feel passionate instead of platonic. What a rush!
-Ellen Kreidman, author of Light Her Fire: How to Ignite Passion and Excitement in the Women You Love
You don't have to have a model-perfect body to have maximum fun in the bedroom. Look at yourself naked in a full-length mirror for five minutes a day and focus on what you love about your body. If this feels awkward, turn on some music and dance naked with your mirror image. By getting used to your unique shape, you'll gain confidence that will naturally spill over into your sex life and make you twice as enticing to your guy.
To surprise him and build anticipation, try doing the same things you always do in the bedroom, but slow down to one-fourth of your normal speed. You and your guy will have time to really bond, and since you'll be feeling sensation over a longer period of time, both your orgasms will likely be out of this world.
- Created: 26 December 2008
- Last Updated: 21 August 2014