Male Impotence - What is Male Impotence?

Written by HealthyPlace.com Staff Writer

If a man can stop ejaculating for anything over one minute after penetration, this is normal. It may not sound very long, but our primitive male ancestors were originally designed to thrust only five or six times before reaching orgasm. Humans are unique among the animal kingdom in using sex for pleasure. The male chimpanzee, for example, ejaculates within 30 seconds of intercourse and the female satisfies herself by mating with many males in quick succession.

Premature ejaculation is usually due to anxiety especially if a new partner is involved. This often results in eagerness and over-excitement. The other main cause is anxiety about performance whether you will be 'good enough' for your partner or will fail to satisfy. No man wants to feel his performance is not up to

Other causes of premature ejaculation are the man feeling that his partner is not really interested in sex, or if either partner has difficulty in showing or responding to affection.

Sometimes the opposite problem of retarded ejaculation occurs especially if the male is trying to postpone his orgasm to make sure his partner is satisfied (see below).

The easiest way to make premature ejaculation less of a problem is to bring your partner to the point of orgasm during foreplay. Then, when your partner is about to come, penetration can occur or you can wait until after your partner's orgasm before entering. There are eight other techniques that help to overcome premature ejaculation. As some of these seem to take the pleasure out of sex, they will not suit every man:

1. Wear a condom. This damps down sensory stimulation and usually helps to prolong intercourse.

2. Use a local anaesthetic cream to numb the tip of the penis. These creams can be bought over the counter. Make sure you buy a pure anaesthetic cream rather than a preparation intended for piles, as the latter sometimes contains other agents that might cause irritation to both yourself and your partner.

3. Tense the buttock muscles while thrusting. This helps to mask signals from nerve endings in the penis and gives you something else to concentrate on.

4. Think about something other than sex while making love, such as problems at work, or your plans for the following day. By taking your mind off sex (just for a moment!) you may find you can penetrate your partner for longer.

5. Just before ejaculation, the testicles naturally rise in the scrotum to sit close to the base of the penis. If you gently pull the testicles back down into the scrotum, you may find this helps delay ejaculation. Be careful not to twist them, however.

6. If you are able to penetrate your partner, pre-arrange a signal, such as saying 'stop'. Then, when you feel you are about to come, both you and your partner can become still and stop thrusting. This may help to prolong intercourse and can be repeated as often as necessary.

7. The most famous way of preventing premature ejaculation is the 'squeeze' technique. The man's partner gently masturbates him until he says he is about to come. The partner then gently squeezes the penis between the thumb and two fingers just below the helmet, where the glans joins the shaft. The squeeze should be firmly sustained for about five seconds and then the pressure relaxed for a minute. This can be repeated to postpone ejaculation as often as you wish and is often highly successful. By retraining your sexual habits, you will eventually be able to achieve normal intercourse. During intercourse, a man can also squeeze his penis himself, providing he has enough prior warning of impending ejaculation to reach down in time.

8. After experiencing premature ejaculation, wait for an hour and then try again. The second erection often lasts longer and orgasm can be delayed.

If none of these tips work, seek help from your doctor. You can be referred for professional psychosexual counseling in which you and your partner will be given help and exercises to try. Often, intercourse and orgasm are banned altogether, which takes away the pressure to perform.

Retarded Ejaculation

Retarded ejaculation is the inability of a man to ejaculate, despite having prolonged intercourse, adequate stimulation, and an intense desire to do so. This is an occasional occurrence in most men, especially when tired, but some males have never achieved ejaculation during sexual intercourse. Most affected men are able to ejaculate during masturbation.

Medical conditions such as diabetes, an enlarged prostate gland, previous prostate operation or certain drugs (e.g. water tablets, tricyclic antidepressants, treatment for high blood pressure) are sometimes at fault.

The commonest cause of ejaculatory failure, however, are psychological inhibitions such as in the case of:

• newlyweds sleeping next door to their parents

• discovering a spouse is unfaithful

• a recent condom break when pregnancy would have been disastrous

• having recently been interrupted during sex, such as by your children.

These episodes can trigger retarded ejaculation through a subconscious inhibition of the ejaculatory reflex. Make sure your surroundings are compatible with unstressful sex that is, quiet, with no risk of interruption or being overheard, warm and comfortable. If problems persist you can be referred for psychotherapy, which will involve a structured program of sexual exercises as 'homework'.

next: Erectile Dysfunction