Skills for Dealing with Confrontation

Some of us aren't very good in dealing with confrontation. These confrontation skills may help you.

Confrontation Skills

Employ "I messages"

"I messages" are irrefutable statements about the communicator's feelings, thoughts, observations, perceptions, and reactions.  When confronting someone, talk in terms of yourself, for example, "I think," "I feel," "In my experience," "for myself," "I need," "I've observed."

State your request clearly

Be honest and direct.  Do not overexplain or apologize.

Focus on the offending behavior involved, not the person

Be specific in your description of the behavior and the effect it had on you.

Use appropriate non-verbal behaviors

Show the intensity of  your feelings. Look the other person in the eye.  Speak clearly, without hesitation, leaning toward the listener.

next: How to Control Your Anger