Chapter 7, The Soul of a Narcissist, The State of the Art

Written by Dr. Sam Vaknin

The Concepts of Narcissistic Accumulation and Narcissistic Regulation

Chapter Seven

The narcissist derives his Narcissistic Supply from PNSSs and SNSSs (Primary and Secondary Narcissistic Supply Sources). But this supply is used by the narcissist much the same as one uses perishable goods.

He has to replenish this supply and, as is the case with other drug addictions, he has to increase the dosage as he goes. He uses the supply to substitute for certain ego functions (example: to regulate his self-esteem and sense of self-worth).

While the narcissist uses up his supply, his partner accumulates it by serving as a silent witness to the narcissist's accomplishments and moments of grandeur.

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When the narcissist has a spouse or girlfriend, for instance, he can use her to supplement his Narcissistic Supply (NS). To him, she represents a multipurpose instrument. She is both a SNSS and a reservoir of NS. We limit the following discussion to a female mate because, usually, she is a mother substitute, a mock Primary Object and meaningful other. But the function of the accumulation of NS is performed by all SNSSs, male or female, inanimate or social.

To elucidate this matter further, let us study an example:

A narcissist becomes a celebrity and his partner is witness to his meteoric rise as a media star. She constitutes living proof of his moments of glory. In a way, to her, he remains famous forever and she constitutes a constant, reliable Source of Narcissistic Supply. She is always there to adore him and reflect his erstwhile fame, even after it had long faded.

Being with a partner reduces the narcissist's need to pursue other NSSs. Thus, it reduces his motivation to generate NSSs through creative activities. Narcissists create exclusively in the pursuit of NSSs (which garners them attention, adulation, publicity, and recognition). They create not because they love to or are compelled to do so.

The narcissist dedicates a lot of energy to managing his portfolio of NSSs. He invests his objects with instincts. We can say that there is a narcissistic libidinal cathexis when the narcissist invests libido in his self (Reserved Libido) instead of investing it in objects, in creative activities, in real achievements, in writing, or in business, in short: in the real world out there (Residual Libido).

This explains why the narcissist is so disinterested in others, lacks empathy, is indifferent to emotionally invested sex, prefers autoerotic and exhibitionist sex, etc. A huge amount of libido is invested in trying to "break through", "prove to them", and "be the biggest and bigger than life". Because the amount of libido available to any individual is limited (Freud's concept of the economy of the libido) not much is left for meaningful psychosexual interactions, for creativity, and for the task of maturely confronting the world on its own terms.

The Reserved Libido is initially used up in the process of attaining goals and for acts of creativity. These are meant to facilitate the formation and maintenance of NSSs. But once this overriding goal is achieved and NSSs are formed, part of the Reserved Libido is no longer needed (Free Libido).

The reason some libido is freed is because NSSs substitute for certain libido functions. This is not to give the impression that the narcissist is an efficient user of libido. On the contrary, the allocation of his energy resources is completely distorted by the need to direct libido towards his self and by the need to maintain a hot pursuit of NSSs. The narcissist's libido functions under a narcissistic constraint: obtain NSS!

The narcissist uses the Free Libido and directs it at objects. But the quantity of Free Libido fluctuates unpredictably. Whenever the NSS dwindle, the Free Libido is expropriated and transformed into Residual Libido. It is then used to replenish the NSS. The Free Libido is also used to transform the partner into a NSS.

This scheme of allocation of various types of libido explains a few phenomena.

The narcissist loses his drive and his creativity when he finds a partner. Partly, this is what Freud called "sublimation". The partner consumes the Free Libido and thus reduces the total amount of Residual Libido available to the narcissist. Gradually, a new equilibrium is reached.

The reduced Residual Libido is not sufficient to create new NSS. The remaining Free Libido is then enlisted and is transformed into Residual Libido. The relationship with the partner is severely damaged, to the point of abandonment, because there remains no Free Libido to sustain it.

Creativity and achievement (NSSs) are hampered by the diversion of Free Libido to the partner. Once the partner is gone, the Residual Libido - strengthened by the now available Free Libido - finds new NSS and thus allows the narcissist to develop a new relationship, as doomed to failure as its predecessors.

The narcissist finds it easier to enter a relationship when NSSs are abundant because NSSs are libidinal substitutes. By fulfilling libidinal functions they free a part of the Residual Libido (the type of libido engaged in obtaining NSSs). This part becomes Free Libido (the type of libido which deals with relating to objects).