Instincts and Drives

The Cerebral Narcissist

Sexual abstinence, low frequency of sexual activity lead to less emotional involvement.
Frustration of emotional objects through sex avoidance encourages abandonment by the object.
Sexual disintimisation by preferring autoerotic,
anonymous sex with immature or incompatible objects
(who do not represent an emotional threat or pose demands).
Sporadic sex with long intervals and drastic alterations of sexual behaviour patterns.
Dissociation of pleasure centres:
Pleasure avoidance (unless "for and on behalf" of the object)
Refraining from child rearing or family formation
Using the object as an "alibi" not to form new sexual and emotional liaisons,
extreme marital and monogamous faithfulness,
to the point of ignoring all other objects leads to object inertia.
This mechanism defends the narcissist from the need to make contact with other objects.
Sexual frigidity with significant other and sexual abstinence with others.

The Somatic Narcissist

The somatic narcissist treats others as sex objects or sex slaves or masturbatory aides.

High frequency of unemotional sex, lacking in intimacy and warmth.

Object Relations

Manipulative attitudes, which in conjunction with feelings of
omnipotence and omniscience, create a mystique of infallibility and immunity.
Partial reality test
Social friction leads to social sanctions (up to imprisonment)
Refraining from intimacy
Absence of emotional investment or presence
Reclusive life, avoiding neighbours, family (both nuclear and extended), spouse and friends
The narcissist is often a schizoid
Active misogyny (women-hatred) with sadistic and anti-social elements
Narcissistic dependence serves as substitute for emotional involvement
Immature emotional dependence and habit
Object interchangeability
(dependence upon ANY object - not upon a specific object).
Limitation of contacts with objects to material and "cold" transactions
The narcissist prefers fear, adulation, admiration and narcissistic accumulation to love.
To the narcissist, objects have no autonomous existence except as PNSSs and SNSSs
(Primary and Secondary Sources of Narcissistic Supply).
Knowledge and intelligence serve as control mechanisms and
extractors of adulation and attention (Narcissistic Supply).
The object is used to re-enact early life conflicts:
The narcissist is bad and asks to be punished anew
and thus obtain confirmation that people are angry at him.
The object is kept emotionally distant through deterrence
and is constantly tested by the narcissist who reveals his negative sides to the object.
The aim of negative, off-putting behaviours is to check whether
the narcissist's uniqueness will override and offset them in the mind of the object.
The object experiences emotional absence, repulsion, deterrence and insecurity.
It is thus encouraged not to develop emotional involvement with the narcissist
(emotional involvement requires a positive emotional feedback).
The erratic and demanding relationship with the narcissist
is experienced as an energy-depleting burden.
It is punctuated by a series of "eruptions" followed by relief.
The narcissist is imposing, intrusive, compulsive and tyrannical.
Reality is interpreted cognitively so that negative aspects,
real and imagined, of the object are highlighted.
This preserves the emotional distance between the narcissist and his objects,
fosters uncertainty, prevents emotional involvement
and activates narcissistic mechanisms (such as grandiosity)
which, in turn, increase the repulsion and the aversion of the partner.
The narcissist claims to have chosen the object because of an error/circumstances/
pathology/loss of control/immaturity/partial or false information, etc.