QUESTION:

Hi I am 30, borderline. I have been divorced twice and have a fiancée. things aren’t going so well. I have a hard time with relationships. he does not have the compassion that I need he just thinks I am neurotic. other think I am eccentric. which is fine by me, as I don’t enjoy their company anyhow. my life is filled with sadness, fear, aloneness and also a memory problem that is quite a difficult problem. I have learned to live with myself. I wish and hope others in my position will have family of fiancée and friends that can understand as I do not and it is a sad, fearful life. day to day I wonder what kind of cruel trick is this to make a human being with this kind of problem. I have uncontrollable anger that at time I express at inappropriate times and places. I’m angry lonely fearful depressed life is just a drag day to day. I cant hold any type of relationship for any type of time. I am misunderstood. I take meds and they help some but not all the time and those times it is a living hell.

DR. HELLER'S ANSWER:

The principles remain the same:

1. get all your diagnoses made and successfully treated - the "screening test" in my website that I use for my patients may be helpful for you in this regard.
2. have a specific medication plan for treating your stress symptoms
3. you must retrain your brain. You can be happy and successful in life, but not doing what you're currently doing. I highly recommend the book "Are You The One For Me?" by Barbara DeAngelis. It explains who to look for and most importantly who you need to be.

I strongly recommend you spend time with this site and learn as much as you can.

next: Mother with BPD ~ back to: Borderline Personality Disorder FAQs Table of Contents