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Vacations for the Parents |
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by Dr. Paul Wender:
Hyperactivity in the Child, Adolescent, and Adult. ISBN 0195042913.
The following is quoted from Dr. Wender's book.
Living with difficult children is difficult. The techniques I have discussed may make parents' lives easier, but their lives may still be much harder than those of most parents. For this reason I think that it is very important for the parents of ADD children to get away sometimes by themselves. (It is probably highly desirable for all parents. It is essential for the parents of ADD children.) It is not a sign of intellectual, moral, or physical weakness for thse parents to want a periodic vacation alone. ADD children demand much attention, and caring for them can be physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausting. In addition, sometimes the parents' relationship suffers as a result of the tension surrounding the child's problems. the happiness and well-being of everyone should not be sacrificed for the good of the child with problems. Everyone deserves a piece of the pie. Thus, it is an excellent practice for parents to schedule regular time-out periods for themselves.
Obviously, such vacations pose practical problems. The ADD child is often too much of a handful to deposit with unsuspecting relatives. If the community has an organization for parents of ADD children, it might offer opportunities to share child care, with the parents taking turns at vacations without the children. Such trading has the advantage that all the adults involved are aware of the problems of the ADD child and have some knowledge of how to handle them. This kind of trading off is not just of selfish value to the parents. If they are able to spend some time alone with each other and enjoy themselves, they may be more relaxed in handling their ADD child when they return, which would benefit the child (and other children in the family as well.) But whether or not this is the case, it is sufficient that the parents themselves will feel better.
next: Personal Time for Parents Is a Necessity
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Last Updated( Jun 01, 2009 )
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reviewed by: Harry Croft, MD
Psychiatrist, HealthyPlace.com Medical Director
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