Dr. McRoberts signed statements to substantiate the fact. With the help of a lawyer, Linda Jean Hammond became Steve Hammond. I had no trouble accepting it myself. I knew I'd be headed for a hard road, but except for the surgery, I never did take off work, never did have mental help. I look back on it and wonder, "How did I ever have the courage to go through it?"

I called my mother, the only one who knew my secret. She remembered that as a child, I'd had boyish behavior and boyish hands and feet. Still it surprised her. My mother said, "I guess it was my fault letting you have your way (not seeing a doctor). But when your were a baby, there was no way you could tell. I don't know, I guess you accept children the way they are."

John R., my stepfather, cried when he found out - not because he was ashamed, but because he remembered how Steve had helped him in the garage all those years. He sensed the embarrassment I would face in explaining my new identity and how some would refuse to understand. "'What do you reckon happened to Linda?' they'll ask. 'What went wrong?' I'll explain it and tell them all I know about it and then, maybe three months later, they'll ask me to explain it again", my stepfather said. "There's just no use trying to explain it to some people. They just hear what they want to hear."

My mother told my brothers and sister. They seemed to accept my new identity. They never asked me about it. Right after the doctor said I was a man, it was like God was waiting for me to do this all my life. My life really unfolded like a page.

Afterward

I woke up after the first operation in the hospital's gray-and blue tile recovery room. There was Dr. McRoberts sitting next to me in a wooden rocking chair writing his surgical notes, wearing a paisley surgical cap and a blue surgical scrub suit. "Dr. McRoberts, I believe God has blessed your hands," I told him. Medical insurance paid most of the bills. And the good doctor waived the rest.

I have distanced myself from the first 25 years of my life. I threw away my softball trophies and many other reminders of my past. Then I had to convince others that I was a man. As Linda, I had used the women's bathroom at work, and now I would have to use the men's. I had to prove to the personnel officer that I was a man and had changed my name.

The first time I walked into the men's room, there were 10 men inside, some of them snickering. Generally, my co-workers were supportive. But once a man cursed me, called me names and tried to get me to fight. I, determined to respond as a Christian, wouldn't answer, wouldn't fight unless I was hit. My response so affected my tormentor that he, too, became a Christian. Some co-workers have said I'm one of the strongest people they've ever known because I had the nerve. But one man still calls me Linda. My friends knew what I was going through and gave their prayers and help.

Getting Married

Sara Jane Van Winkle and I first met when she accompanied a friend who dropped by my apartment. The friend was worried "about all that Steve was going through" and wanted to check and see if I was all right. Sara Jane is from Rockcastle County and never knew me as Linda. Sara Jane said, "There he was, just another guy in a T-shirt and sweat pants. He seemed a little bit shy. I did most of the talking. But he was open and honest about things.

I always admired that in people. We just talked awhile, got acquainted and that was it." As our relationship developed, I explained everything to Sara Jane. I told her I could have sex but was sterile. Most of her friends accepted me without question.

I married Sara Jane in 1983, a few months after my visit to Dr. McRoberts. I was 26. She was 27. I decided to tell my story because I want people to know this problem was a birth defect - not a sex change. I want to help anyone who may be going through what I went through. I'm planning to write a book about my experiences.

Looking Beyond the Mountains
A book written by Steven Hammond..

Here is the story of how Linda Jean Hammond became Steven Hammond after surgery to correct a genital birth defect. Labeled female at birth, Steven Hammond lived for 25 years as a female -- a boy imprisoned in the trappings of a girl. This is the story of the life of Linda Jean and the birth of Steven at age 25. Click here to order Looking Beyond the Mountains.

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