Abusive Memories :: Physical Abuse Forum

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Abusive Memories

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Aug-08-11 08:56:55

Abusive Memories

I was physically and mentally abused for 9 yrs by a live in boyfriend. I have been out of the relationship for many years. Every so often I have nightmare of the abuse. I never got counceling after the whole thing was over. I am still considering it. Has anyone else had dream/nightmare, and what have you done to forget them? Any advice or info will be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

pfox0810: Ms; New Member; 3 Posts

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Aug-08-11 10:01:47

Re: Abusive Memories

I have terrible nightmares from my abuse and my therapist is helping me deal with the abuse and also helping me deal with the nightmares. She is having me try and take control in my dreams and scream or fight or do something other than just be a wimpy victim. It is hard work, both the therapy and the dream work, but it is SO worth it!

Chanda

Chanda: Platinum Member; 1666 Posts

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Aug-08-11 11:08:29

Re: Abusive Memories

Get into therapy, dealing with any kind of abuse is so hard, but you can do with professional help. I also had nightmares and I know how scary and difficult it is. But there is hope, you just need to get the right help. I have found that having support in this site has helped me a lot, I feel less lonely and more understood.

"We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them." -Albert Einstein

mariac: Maria; Platinum Member; 1710 Posts

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Aug-09-11 05:51:37

Re: Abusive Memories

Thank You I will look into counceling.

pfox0810: Ms; New Member; 3 Posts

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Sep-01-11 09:44:07

Re: Abusive Memories

Let me also mention to find someone who does EMDR (you can google it). It is amazing for taking trauma that is really scary and knocking it down a notch into something that is more of a distant memory and not scary. It is AMAZING.

I just did it for the first time the other day and it worked SO well I am in shock. I can't wait to use it for other trauma that I have been through because it worked so well. I highly recommend it.

If you can find a therapist the does EMDR that would be best.
Chanda

Chanda: Platinum Member; 1666 Posts

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Sep-15-11 13:31:27

Re: Abusive Memories

nightmares are the worst. having to relive it over and over again. waking in cold sweats or screaming. Fighting back does help in your dreams...but its so hard to do or make yourself do. Try it though!
buckeyeraised

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Sep-27-11 11:01:15

Re: Abusive Memories

So far I have been completely unsuccessful in doing anything in my dreams other than just being a victim of them. Bummer but at least I am trying...
Chanda

Chanda: Platinum Member; 1666 Posts

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Oct-11-11 18:08:33

Re: Abusive Memories

I have learned to ask Jesus to take over my dreams. It helps most of the time. The times it doesn't I feel he waants me to deal with the memories. I go to counseling also. trauma will haunt you until you deal with it. then it will slowly diminish it's affect on your mind. At least I hope that is what is happening to me.I don;t want to be stuffing it again.