How to Relieve School Anxiety

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How to Relieve School Anxiety

Get ready, get set, go back to school

(August 9, 2007) -- Schools across the central San Joaquin Valley are preparing for the new school year. In some districts, classes have already resumed. The Bee asked school principals, teachers, counselors and district superintendents for advice they would offer parents and children.

Elementary School

Visit your child's school a few days before the start of classes and show them where to find their classrooms, restrooms, the playground, lunch tables and the office. Some campuses have back-to-school nights, which can help ease the transition.

Darrell Wong / The Fresno Bee

Dinuba High School incoming freshman Guadalupe Rios, 14, gets help Friday from Vice Principal Victor Martinez during registration day.

Separation anxiety on the first day of school can be a problem as much for parents as for children. But be a good role model to make the first day less traumatic for your child. Reassure kindergartners that they will come home at the end of the first day. Say a quick, cheerful good-bye and then say you'll want to hear all about the school day when your child comes home.

Teach kindergartners how to follow two-step directions like those given in classrooms: "Come in and sit down." "Take your paper and pick up a pencil or crayon." Have children practice staying seated. Kids often have to sit on carpets in large groups for classroom activities. Teach children to address their teachers and peers in a respectful manner, wait their turn to answer and share with others.

First grade is often the first time children have eaten away from home by themselves, said Rosalie Baker, administrator in charge of secondary curriculum and staff development for Clovis Unified School District. "Some kids come to school with a lunch pail and think, 'What do I do with this?' " If they do take their lunch, pack their meal and let them eat out of their lunch pail at home for practice.

Be aware that the transition from third to fourth grade provides challenges to students. "Kids are moving from learning-to-read, to reading-to-learn," Baker said. Children will need more help with homework.

Assign chores at home to nurture responsibilities, which helps your child develop the skills to work independently and be classroom leaders. Fourth-grade teachers expect a lot of independence from students because class sizes grow from about 20 in third grade to 35 or more in fourth grade. Help your children be more organized, but allow them to take on more responsibility. Let your children come to you for help with homework before stepping in.

Keep in touch with teachers. Retired educator Frank Murphy, who once worked as superintendent of Cutler-Orosi Joint Unified School District, said that when his daughter was in elementary school, she used to say that she had finished all of her homework when she actually was stuffing her homework assignments in her desk. "Kids play games, but that's why checking with the teachers periodically is so important," Murphy said.

Make sure you know the path your children will take to and from school.

Communicate with the schools and "don't be afraid to volunteer," said Alberto De Leon, assistant principal at Sun Empire Elementary School in Kerman. "We appreciate the help."

Middle School

Be prepared for children to struggle a bit as they adapt to middle school. "Going from one teacher to six teachers -- that's a big transition," said Jonathan Torres, a sixth-grade teacher at Houston Elementary School in Visalia. Let your kids know that every teacher has a different style of teaching, so they shouldn't be surprised if they get their first "B" or "C" in middle school. Encourage your children to try hard and find their groove in school.

Stay involved. For middle and high school students, "that's when we need parents as partners more than ever before," said Marc Johnson, Sanger Unified School District superintendent.

Visit campuses to become acquainted with classrooms, lockers, restrooms, snack bars, the cafeteria and where students catch the bus. Attend back-to-school night to meet teachers and learn about expectations in classes, dress codes and school policies.

Give your children the attention they need, whether it's at the dinner table or at school softball games and band concerts.

"Every time I see these kids doing all these great things and their parents aren't there, they're just not happy," said Rob Zieg, a Visalia Unified School District youth service officer. "They want someone to pay attention to them."

Talk to your children about how they will meet students from other schools, and also coach them on how to make new friends while keeping their old ones. If your child brings up an unfamiliar name or starts wearing too much red, blue or other gang-affiliated attire, check it out. Invite your child's friends over to the house.

Keep an eye on what kids are scribbling on their backpacks or book covers. Look for Old English script or gang-related words such as "northside" or "southside." Also, look for gang-related numbers such as "13" or "14."

Middle school students will be changing clothes for P.E., showering and getting used to using lockers. Talk to them about those new experiences and make sure they bring home P.E. clothes at least once a week for washing.

Help students get organized by having them keep an assignment log. And make sure you and your child understand graduation requirements.

Keep kids busy. "The more free time or idle time they have, the more likely they're going to have to be involved in a risky behavior," said Brian Kitson, a history teacher at John Muir Middle School in Corcoran.

High School

Encourage high school freshmen to envision their future: a two-year college, a four-year university? When going on a family trip, visit a college as part of that trip -- even if it's just taking a walk on campus.

Become familiar with the requirements for graduation -- such as the state's high school exit exam, which students begin taking as sophomores -- and make sure your child is familiar. "The whole notion of credits in high school is a shocker," said Dwight Miller, Caruthers Unified School District superintendent. Sometimes "it doesn't really sink in until they're seniors. When you fail your classes, there's a consequence. The best way to not have that happen is do your homework and stay on top of things."

Stay involved with your child's education. But staying involved with their schoolwork doesn't mean having to learn calculus. Talk with teachers and counselors if problems arise. Get to know your child's counselor, who often can be the first contact with questions or concerns.

If teachers don't call back, it's not because they don't care. It's probably because they have 250 other students to look after. Go to the school. If you don't feel comfortable talking with the teacher or school principal, talk with the school secretary or an instructional aide -- who are likely to be from the community or may even be a neighbor.

If your child is acting up, say you want to observe him or her in class. Students -- not wanting that to happen -- will usually shape up. Be sure to follow through if need be.

Ask three important questions at back-to-school and open-house nights: Is my child completing and turning in homework? How does my child do on tests? How is my child's behavior at school? Also keep in mind that some schools have Web sites listing students' homework assignments.

Be vigilant about your child's friends and acquaintances. High school students can be naive about gangs. Check out your child's friends and their friends' parents. Make sure those parents share the same values that you do on appropriate behavior, especially where alcohol, drugs, sex and gangs are concerned. Trust your children, but also keep tabs on them.

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Be aware of your child's use of MySpace and of Internet predators. Bad things happen in good homes when parents aren't paying attention.

Initiate conversation, said Kathleen Lopes, associate superintendent of education services for Madera Unified School District. "Sometimes we don't realize when students are having issues because they don't talk about it." Ask your child how the day went and what they learned.

Tomas Ovalle / The Fresno Bee

Steve Williams, 16, welcomes incoming freshman to Washington Uniion High School on Tuesday during orientation. Williams is part of Link Crew, a group of spirited juniors who help freshmen make an easier transition from middle school to high school by engaging the newcomers in dialogue, icebreaker activities and friendship.

Tomas Ovalle / The Fresno Bee

Freshman Tim Alameid, 14, tries to pop a balloon with junior Yolanda Viscarra, 17, on Tuesday during an orientatioin activity at Washington Union High School.

By Eddie Jimenez and Susie Pakoua Vang
SOURCE: The Fresno Bee

Last updated 08/07

How to Relieve School Anxiety

Elementary School

Middle School

High School

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