Category Archives: Abusive Behaviors

5 Things I Said To My Abuser That I Wish I’d Heard Myself Say

October 4, 2012 / by / Verbal Abuse in Relationships

I remember saying words to my ex-husband, Will, that didn’t help my abusive relationship or me at all. Will ignored them for the most part, but the tragedy is that I ignored them too. Here are the top five statements … Continue reading →

Do the Effects of Abuse Change You Permanently?

September 6, 2012 / by / Verbal Abuse in Relationships

I lived in an abusive relationship heart and soul for over 17 years. I’ve often wondered if the effects of abuse changed who I am permanently or temporarily. I run into trouble with this question because I was in the … Continue reading →

You Don’t Stop Verbal Abuse With More Words

August 24, 2012 / by / Verbal Abuse in Relationships

Through much of our conversation together, we’ve discussed setting boundaries and telling your abuser what you will and won’t do when s/he behaves abusively. Today, I want you to realize that the words you speak are for you only. Your … Continue reading →

My Friend Abuses His Wife! How Can I Help? (pt 1)

August 9, 2012 / by / Verbal Abuse in Relationships

Recently I received an email from a man who asked a very good question. He said, “A friend’s wife opened up to me about what I think is verbal abuse. She is talking about leaving him if things don’t change, … Continue reading →

Combat Abuse: Helpful Books for Domestic Abuse Victims and Survivors

July 30, 2012 / by / Verbal Abuse in Relationships

When I discovered the “problems” in my marriage were rooted in abuse, my very first emotion was relief. I felt relief because up until that moment of clarity, I thought that I was losing my mind. My husband almost had … Continue reading →

How Abusers Gain Control By Appearing to Lose It

July 22, 2012 / by / Verbal Abuse in Relationships

You, the target of verbal abuse, have one mission in your efforts to end verbal abuse: keep your emotions in check. Your verbal abuser subscribes to the opposite mission. Your abuser wants you to lose emotional control because when that … Continue reading →

Retaliation Against Abuse

July 15, 2012 / by / Verbal Abuse in Relationships

I surfed the web this week and found a discussion in which yet another person said something to the effect of if an abuse victim chooses to stay and be abused, then it’s her fault she’s abused. Along those same … Continue reading →

Side Effects of Abuse Trick You Into Staying

July 1, 2012 / by / Verbal Abuse in Relationships

Staring at this blank space, waiting for me to write something, reminds me of my days of abuse. Each day could seem so clean and full of promise – the trick was, I had to expend energy to make it … Continue reading →

Early Abuse In My Relationship – A Story of Abuse

June 26, 2012 / by / Verbal Abuse in Relationships

Early in my relationship with my ex-husband, Will, I felt afraid in his presence. I’ve often wondered why I stayed with him in these early days. My boyfriends before him generally treated me well – very well. I’d known no … Continue reading →

How Did You Brainwash Me?

June 21, 2012 / by / Verbal Abuse in Relationships

When people ask, “Why do women stay in abusive relationships?” the answers are often too simple. There could be financial reasons, but if the abusive spouse died, would the victim wonder if they could support themselves to the point of … Continue reading →