• advertisement

Our Mental Health Blogs

Ending Verbal Abuse: Five Steps to Take

Ending Verbal Abuse: Five Steps to Take

Ending verbal abuse isn't easy. Verbal abuse leads to long-term emotional damage, but how do we end the cycle? Here are five ideas on ending verbal abuse.

So, you’ve spotted the signs of verbal abuse in your relationship and you want to end the verbal abuse. You know that blaming, shaming, threatening and name-calling does not equate to a happy or healthy partnership. You realize that maybe — just maybe — you deserve better. So how do you make it stop? Is ending verbal abuse possible?

Continue reading

What To Say To A Victim Of Domestic Violence

What To Say To A Victim Of Domestic Violence

Knowing what to say to a victim of domestic violence can make all the difference in the world. You have to change the victim of violence's reality. Read how.

So what do we say to a victim of domestic violence? More specifically, what should we say to a friend who is abused if they come to us for help? The confusion over what to say is warranted. Even my mother didn’t know what to say to me when I cried to her about the abuse, and my mother is brilliant. However, since I’ve been an abuser’s target, I have a good idea of what to say to a victim of domestic violence, and I’ll tell you all about it.

Continue reading

How to Live With Abuse: Connect With Your Intuition

How to Live With Abuse: Connect With Your Intuition

How can you live with abuse in a healthier way? Learn to trust your intuition and it will keep you safer & saner until you decide to leave the abuse.

How do you live with abuse and learn to trust your intuition after distrusting yourself for so long? Why do you want to revive your intuition anyway? Here’s the deal: your abuser wants you isolated from everyone and anything (such as your intuition) that could convince you to leave the relationship.

You’ve learned how to live with abuse your partner’s way. It’s time to live with abuse a new way.

Continue reading

End Your Abusive Relationship By Trusting Your Intuition

End Your Abusive Relationship By Trusting Your Intuition

End your abusive relationship by trusting your intuition? Didn't your intuition tell you he/she was the one? Why should you trust yourself? Here's why.

Wondering how to end your abusive relationship? There’s one way that requires no tools, no tears and no trust given to anyone but yourself. You see, trusting your intuition is like trusting that one friend who never lets you down (imagine that friend if you haven’t had one since being isolated). Your intuition guides you through life safely when you develop and use it correctly.

And therein lies a problem: an abusive relationship disconnects you from your intuition. Abusers know that trusting your intuition will lead you away from their control pull, and eventually, your intuition can end your abusive relationship.

Continue reading

Top 10 Most Engaging Verbal Abuse Posts From 2013

Top 10 Most Engaging Verbal Abuse Posts From 2013

These engaging verbal abuse posts encourage you to open up about your abusive experience so others don't suffer as long as you did. Participate in the comments.

Last year, I did a top ten list of the most viewed Verbal Abuse in Relationships blog posts, so I thought I’d do something different this time. The posts on this list earned the largest percentage of comments per times viewed. If you missed them, perhaps you want to add your two cents. Readers tell me all the time they get as much from the comments as they get from the post, so share your experience so we can ALL benefit!

Continue reading

How To Find Some Peace In An Abusive Relationship

How To Find Some Peace In An Abusive Relationship

I tried to write this post earlier today, but evidently there were some comments and stories I needed to read first. Stories from addicts, ministers and other abuse survivors reminded me of how much I used to fight my abuser. I fought with my ex-husband so often that I accepted some isolation to spare myself the embarrassment of fighting in front of his friends. At the end, I think every one of the people my ex hung out with knew that I couldn’t stand to look at him.

No wonder they believed his stories that I was miserable and unstable. I couldn’t open my mouth without something negative about my ex sliding out. My feelings for him surrounded me like a prickly heat and they made me seem like someone I was not. Ugly. Hateful. Mean. My feelings for my ex made it easy for his friends to feel sorry for him, give him a place to stay, and believe his side of whatever story he told.

Continue reading

Can A Verbal Abuser Change?

Can A Verbal Abuser Change?

Can a verbal abuser change? You will only know if he or she shuts up long enough to prove change is happening through their actions - not his or her words.

Can a verbal abuser change? I’ve heard that question so many times and it is always delivered with a longing tone. Verbal abuse victims very much want their abuser to want to change. Some verbal abusers honestly do want to change. I don’t know how rare those types of abusers are, and there’s no way to know if your partner wants to change by listening to what they say because it is so easy to lie.

Continue reading

Am I Imagining the Abuse in My Relationship?

Am I Imagining the Abuse in My Relationship?

You probably are not imagining the abuse in your relationship. The abuser has tricks that make you believe the abuse is all in your head. But is it? Read this.

So often, people ask me the question “Am I imagining the abuse? Is it just in my head or is there a problem with my marriage?” Sure, sometimes problems are just in our heads, and we might also make mountains out of molehills. I suppose you could be imagining problems where there are none, and you could be imagining abuse. But if outside of your relationship your judgment seems sane, then I really doubt you are imagining the abuse. More likely, the effects of abuse are messing with you.

Continue reading

Psalm 27 and Domestic Abuse

Psalm 27 and Domestic Abuse

Recently I had the opportunity to converse with a woman, Cathy, who lives with an abusive man. She didn’t know exactly where to start her story, but I noticed that “psalm27” was part of her email address.

I am familiar with the prayer because it gave me comfort during my days of living with an abusive man. Initially, Psalm 27 seemed to tell me to stay on track, that God sent trials my way for a reason. I came to understand it differently, and I’d like to share with you the email I sent to Cathy (with her permission of course, and with a few edits for clarity).

I don’t usually delve into religion or my lack of religion on this blog. I do not pretend to be a biblical scholar. However, God (by whatever name) and I are tight. I listen to The Voice – but sometimes my human mind doesn’t want to hear the real message at first.

Continue reading

Things That Abuse Survivors Know But Abuse Victims Don’t

Things That Abuse Survivors Know But Abuse Victims Don’t

What do you abuse survivors know now that you didn't when you experienced abuse? What would you most like current victims to understand?

First I need to clarify something. There are no domestic abuse victims reading this post. I know that because if you are an abuse victim, you’re online researching troubled relationships and self-help information aimed at fixing a frazzled marriage. You certainly are not searching for information about any “abuse victim”. In my mind, abuse victims do not know they are abuse victims. Abuse victims truly do not recognize the abuse as abuse.

If you know and admit that you’re in an abusive relationship, then you are no longer a victim. You are a survivor of domestic abuse. Only survivors read this blog, pure and simple. That said, you may wonder why I am writing an article for an abuse victim who will never read it. Because I want to remind you, the survivor, just how far you’ve come in your efforts to end abuse in your life.

Continue reading


Follow Us

  • advertisement

in Verbal Abuse in Relationships Comments

Mental Health Newsletter

Sign up for the HealthyPlace mental health newsletter for latest news, articles, events.

Mental Health
Newsletter Subscribe Now!

Mental Health Newsletter

Sign up for the HealthyPlace mental health newsletter for latest news, articles, events.

Log in

Login to your account

Username *
Password *
Remember Me