Q. Over the last several years, whenever I am put into a situation where I have to speak to a group or conduct a meeting, I sometimes get nervous, now more often than usual. A tremendous tickle occurs, causing me to cough or clear my throat. I work very hard using willpower and try to curb or stop the tickle with very little success. I went to a doctor with the problem and he didn't seem to understand. I need help. Someone who shares my office has asked if I have some sort of sickness. Please help.

A. I work very hard using will-power and try to curb or stop the tickle with very little success.

This is probably the problem! With any of our anxiety reactions, the harder we try and stop them the worse they get. Can you become aware of how you are thinking prior to the meetings, speaking etc.? Are you saying to yourself, 'what if I cough, clear my throat, what if I can't talk,' 'What if I make a fool of myself?' 'What will everyone think?' etc. This is more than enough to get it all going, then when you fight to control it, it gets worse!

We know this sounds difficult, but we all need to be able to get to the point where we begin to think about our various fears in the context of 'So what'. In this case...'So What if I cough etc'. When we can learn to control our thinking and let the reaction happen without buying further into it, it disappears!

A couple of times this has happened to me as a result of an allergy and if I am doing a radio/TV interview, I place a 'Fisherman's Friend' throat lozenge in my mouth. I don't chew it or suck on it, I just let it dissolve slowly in my mouth. It doesn't interfere with my talking and it stops the cough. (By the way I have found Fisherman's Friend' lozenges are the only ones that stop it from happening.) If I am speaking publicly, I just either cough or clear my throat and say 'excuse me'. I don't ever think about it, then or after!

See if you can manage your thinking and if you can just let it happen. I

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