How to Relax and Cope with Stress

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A step-by-step guide on how to recognize the signs of stress and how to effectively deal with stress.

If you are feeling stressed, then you may be having trouble with sleeping and concentrating, and with being positive and hopeful. Your body may be trying to get you to recognize that it is feeling stressed by giving you headaches, making you feel sick, giving you indigestion, a fluttery feeling in the tummy, or any one of a number of other signs that are trying to show you that you need to relax.

Here are some ideas to help you deal with stress.

Recognize your signs of stress

Think of a time that was stressful for you - it might have been an exam or a disagreement with a friend, or maybe you needed to tell someone something really important and didn't know how they'd react.

Try to remember how your body felt

Did you have butterflies in the tummy before the exam?
Did you get a headache when arguing?
Did you find it hard to sleep before telling that person the news?

Stop now and have a think about how it felt for you. Perhaps you could write those signs down so you'll remember later.

Dealing with stress (your reactions)

How did you deal with the stress in the situation you thought about before? Was it helpful?
Was there another situation where you dealt with stress really well?

Perhaps you could write those strategies down to remember for times you need them. There are many choices in the way that you can deal with stress. Talk to friends about good ways they use to deal with stress to increase your choices.

Positive self-talk

Positive self-talk helps you tap into your inner strengths. We all have inner strengths. Positive self-talk is about using your mind in the way you want, to help yourself. It helps us to decide how we'll react to stress. When we do the opposite (negative thinking) we create more stress for ourselves. Here are some ways to use Positive self-talk.

Tell yourself positive statements every day (examples: "I am good at ....", "I have inner strength", "I have true beauty within", "All is well", "I feel peaceful now").
Picture seeing yourself in a positive situation - one that you want to move towards (eg. see yourself doing that school test and being relaxed about it and doing well, picture the teacher reading your test and being impressed on how well you did).
Remind yourself of things you've done well in the past ("I did well on that school project last year - this means I can do it again").
Look at the big picture - will it really matter in 5 years? Will the world stop turning if it does or doesn't happen?
Work on what you can control, accept the rest and let it go.
You can even make a tape of your own voice saying positive, relaxing, supportive things.