Strategies for the Home

Children with ADD can learn to control some aspects of their behavior and to succeed in school and at home. When parents establish and enforce a few rules and maintain a system of rewards, children incorporate such rules into their daily routine. Remember that every child, with or without ADD, has individual strengths, and weaknesses. Once you identify your child’s strengths, you can use them to build your child’s self-esteem and help to provide the confidence your child needs to tackle whatever he or she finds difficult.

Discipline can best be maintained by establishing a few consistent rules with immediate consequences whenever each rule is broken. Rules should be phrased positively in terms of what your child should do. Praise your child and reward him or her for good behavior.

Children with ADD respond well to a structured system of rewards for good behavior. This system encourages the child to work in order to earn privileges or rewards he or she wants by accumulating points for desired behaviors and removing points for undesirable behaviors. You can make charts or use tokens or stickers to show your child the consequences of good behavior. You should only work on a few behaviors at one time and add additional behaviors as others are learned.

Make a written agreement (a contract) with your child in which the child agrees to do his or her homework every night or to demonstrate other desired behavior in return for a privilege he or she selects, such as the right to watch a certain television show. If your child does not fulfill the contract, remove the promised privilege.

Another effective strategy is to provide a specified time-out location for your child to go when he or she is out of control. This should not be seen as a place of punishment, but as a place the child uses to calm down. Younger children may need to be told to go to the time-out location, but older children should learn to sense when they need to calm down and go on their own.

Set up a study area away from distractions and establish a specific time each day for the child to do homework. Do not allow your child to do homework near the television set or the radio.

Devise a calendar of long-term assignments and other tasks. Keep this on the refrigerator door, or other visible place, where it can remind your child of what he or she needs to do.

Have the teacher make a checklist of homework to be completed and items to be brought to school the next day. Before your child goes to bed, check the list to make sure everything has been completed.
In general, punishing the child is not as effective as using praise and rewards. Rather than focusing on weaknesses, you should assist your child in developing personal strengths.

Avoid emotional reactions such as anger, sarcasm, and ridicule. Remember your child has problems with control, and it only makes him or her feel worse to be told a task is easy or anyone can do it. However, short, mild reprimands can remind children to focus their attention.

Preparation for Adulthood

Children with ADD may require additional help in managing the transition to independent adulthood. They may need help learning how to structure their time and how to prioritize what they have to do. As children grow older, you can give them more responsibility so they can learn from their own decisions.

The hard work of children with ADD, their parents, and their teachers helps them develop their abilities and prepares them for success in their adult lives. With assistance, children with ADD can develop strategies that allow them to work around their ADD and the problems it causes.

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