The final characteristic of the ADHD teenager is that he /she will systematically move away from the support of home and create rifts with his home life and in his relationship with parental figures. This is a difficult stage for any teenager but it becomes excruciatingly delicate and intricate in the case of ADHD students, particularly with regards to the issues of lying, impulse control – or lack thereof – and the mild Tourette’s like utterance which are so common when it comes to inappropriate sexual remarks with third parties or feelings of anger towards parents. Parents quickly become alienated, threatened and scared and eventually build defence mechanism that the teenager will be unable to overcome. Only the dedicated pedagogue, the well informed boarding staff, matron or housemaster will be able to “deconstruct” these behavioural issues and show the parents how these difficulties fall under wider, more general and universal symptoms and diagnosis. This is when the specialist teacher or boarding staff member must step in and be able to direct the parent towards books, website and other reference material. There is nothing more reassuring to a worried parent than to read the accounts of others just like them who have experienced those very same problems. It puts an immediate end to the fear and the feeling of utter loss they usually find themselves in. Suddenly the emotional status quo is broken, the connection and trust re-established between child, parent and school staff. I have often been told by parents of ADHD teenagers that I knew their child better than they did. I have always made sure I used this knowledge to reintroduce their child back to them in a different light, one that would be more useful in guiding them, and I have always made sure that I shared my understanding to give them greater insight.

ADHD Doesn't Disappear, It Needs To Be Managed

Too often the parents of ADHD children have been led to think that quick and early diagnosis at prep school had eliminated the issue of ADHD for good. ADHD is cyclical and the diagnosis will reappear regularly in an individual’s life affecting in turn different stages of his/ her growth. It is never “solved” and it must never been thought as such, at the risk of creating more damage later. It will be the cause of different issues at different ages and give rise to a varying number of behavioural problems. The grounded and well-adjusted ADHDer is ready for this and manages the issues, as they arise, in full self-knowledge and a clear understanding of his condition and the way his/ her brain works; the receptive parent must be equally informed and calm; the greatest boarding staff will be resourceful, loving and inspiring and pinpoint to the child the features of the boarding environment that will assist him/ her towards a smooth transition to Sixth Form and the world of adults. Here definitely lies the greatest Special Needs challenge of boarding schools this decade.

Frederic Fovet is the Headmaster and co-founder of Collège Northside, an experimental British Boarding school based in Quebec.

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