Familiar Problems

The scope of relationship problems caused by Internet addiction has been undermined by its current popularity and advanced utility. Young (1996) found that serious relationship problems were reported by fifty-three percent of Internet addicts surveyed. Marriages, dating relationships, parent-child relationships, and close friendships have been noted to be seriously disrupted by "net binges." Patients will gradually spend less time with people in their lives in exchange for solitary time in front of a computer.

Marriages appear to be the most affected as Internet use interferes with responsibilities and obligations at home, and it is typically the spouse who takes on these neglected chores and often feels like a "Cyberwidow." Addicted on-line users tend to use the Internet as an excuse to avoid needed but reluctantly performed daily chores such as doing the laundry, cutting the lawn, or going grocery shopping. Those mundane tasks are ignored as well as important activities such as caring for children. For example, one mother forgot such things as to pick up her children after school, to make them dinner, and to put them to bed because she became so absorbed in her Internet use.

Loved ones first rationalize the obsessed Internet user’s behavior as "a phase" in hopes that the attraction will soon dissipate. However, when addictive behavior continues, arguments about the increased volume of time and energy spent on-line soon ensue, but such complaints are often deflected as part of the denial exhibited by the patients. Addictive use is also evidenced by angry and resentful outbursts at others who question or try to take away their time from using the Internet, often times in defense of their Internet use to a husband or wife. For example, "I don’t have a problem," or "I am having fun, leave me alone," might be an addict’s response when questioned about their usage.

Matrimonial lawyers have reported seeing a rise in divorce cases due to the formation of such Cyberaffairs (Quittner, 1997). Individuals may form on-line relationships which over time will eclipse time spent with real life people. The addicted spouse will isolate socially himself or herself and refuse to engage in once enjoyed events by the couple such as going out to dinner, attending community or sports outings, or travel, and preferring the company of on-line companions. The ability to carry out romantic and sexual relationships on-line further deteriorates the stability of real life couples. The patient will continue to emotionally and socially withdraw from the marriage, exerting more effort to maintain recently discovered on-line "lovers."

Internet use then interferes with real life interpersonal relationships as those who live with or who are close to the Internet addict respond in confusion, frustration, and jealousy around the computer. For example, Conrad sent this e-mail to me which explains, "My girlfriend spends from 3 to 10 hours a day on the net. Often engaged in cybersex and flirting with other men. Her activities drive me nuts! She lies about it so I have gone out on the net to ‘get the goods’ to confront her with it. I am finding myself spending almost as much time now. I just broke it off with her in an effort to put some sanity back into my own life. It is a sad story. By the way, we are not kids, but middle-aged adults." Similar to alcoholics who will try to hide their addiction, Internet addicts engage in the same lying about how long their Internet sessions really last or they hide bills related to fees for Internet service. These same characteristics create distrust and over time will hurt the quality of once stable relationships.

Academic Problems

The Internet has been touted as a premiere educational tool driving schools to integrate Internet services among their classroom environments. However, one survey revealed that eighty-six percent of responding teachers, librarians, and computer coordinators believe that Internet usage by children does not improve performance (Barber, 1997). Respondents argued that information on the Internet is too disorganized and unrelated to school curriculum and textbooks to help students achieve better results on standardized tests. To further question its educational value, Young (1996) found that fifty-eight percent of students reported a decline in study habits, a significant drop in grades, missed classes, or being placed on probation due to excessive Internet use.

Although the merits of the Internet make it an ideal research tool, students surf irrelevant web sites, engage in chat room gossip, converse with Internet penpals, and play interactive games at the cost of productive activity. Alfred University’s Provost W. Richard Ott investigated why normally successful students with 1200 to 1300 SATs had recently been dismissed. To his surprise, his investigation found that forty-three percent of these students failed school due to extensive patterns of late night log-ons to the university computer system (Brady, 1996). Beyond tracking Internet misuse among students, college counselors began seeing client’s whose primary problem was an inability to control their Internet use. A survey initiated by counselors at the University of Texas at Austin found that of the 531 valid responses, 14% met criteria for Internet addiction (Scherer, in press). This resulted in forming a campus-wide seminar called "It’s 4am, and I Can’t, Uh-Won’t Log Off" to increase awareness about the risk factors of Internet misuse among students. Dr. Jonathan Kandell at the University of Maryland at College Park’s Counseling Center went so far as to initiate an Internet addiction support group when he noticed academic impairment and poor integration in extracurricular activities due to excessive Internet use on campus (Murphey, 1996).