What It Takes For You To Stop Self-Injuring - How to Stop Self-Injuring

Written by HealthyPlace.com Staff Writer

Dr. Reynolds: Well, I realize that you may not be able to interact with me and answer my question. Basically, I think that is the central piece. If she refuses to go, then, providing the emotional support that you do is no doubt helpful. Beyond that, it is essentially impossible to control a nineteen year old's behavior. I know this must be very frustrating, but your hands are somewhat tied.

For parents in general, there are some good self-help books that they might consider reading, such as "Eclipses" by Melissa Ford Thornton. Another book I want to mention that can be helpful for friends and family of self-injurers is "Stop Walking On Eggshells."

I also emphasize that it is not reasonable for any parent to think that it is their "fault" that their children are engaging in self-injury. Things are not that simple.

hippiemommy3: Other than cutting and forms of self mutilation, is taking overdoses a form of self injury? At least once a week I seem to take 20 Darvocet and I want to stop. I am in a day treatment program and have a good therapist. I have medication management, but whenever I get my hands on my pills, I just take too many. Is this self injury, or something else?

Dr. Reynolds: Taking overdoses can be a form of self-injury. In your case, I would want to know your intent. It sounds like your problem is more likely drug addiction.

David: Someone asked a question about the books Dr. Reynolds mentioned. You can find some in our online bookstore.

xXpapercut_pixieXx: Can DBT also be used to bring a person back from a sense of numbness or blankness?

Dr. Reynolds: This sense of numbness is not uncommon in people who have BPD and who self-injure. The answer is yes, DBT can be very helpful for addressing this problem as it so often coexists with BPD and self-injury.

arryanna: Is there any specific medication you have found to help reduce the amount of self-injury?

Dr. Reynolds: No, the few studies that have been done, indicate that no medications are effective in the long-term.

Filly: What if part of the problem is not learning the proper skills. I made it fine through the teens, twenties and most of the thirties with only a few thoughts of self-injury and now, suddenly, after the break up of a long relationship, added with high stress from work, I started to self-injure? By the way I am in the DBT of Portland, and I do believe it will work.

Dr. Reynolds: It is not uncommon that people may "fall apart" and self-injure in instances of extreme stress. It sounds like that's what happened to you. But, you have an excellent prognosis for getting past this, since it started late and you are already in a good treatment program. Good luck.

megs5: I have heard that self-injury is most common among people who have been abused or raped. Why would someone like me cut. I have not been through anything?

Dr. Reynolds: Many people who self-injure or attempt suicide have a history of abuse. However, many do not. The etiology of this behavior is not exactly known. What I believe, is that a person is born biologically with a predisposition to be very emotional. Then, they have an environment that does not meet their needs.

angelight789: Is self-injury related to one's menstrual cycle or hormone level? I am taking a drug called Lupron that induces menopause and I have been cutting more. I have severe endometriosis and a lot of female-related problems. Could this impact my self-injury problem?

Dr. Reynolds: I am not sure whether it could directly affect your cutting. A medical doctor would be better able to answer that. What I can say, is that having health problems increases stress, which certainly increases the likelihood of self-injury.

dazd_and_confusd: I was hospitalized for an attempted suicide last year for 8 and 1/2 months. I'm still suicidal and I self-injure. I'm in therapy, but nothing helps. I'm afraid of going back to the hospital because I don't think it will help, but that seems like the only option. I'm afraid. I hate the way I am and how my life is, and I don't know what else to do.

Dr. Reynolds: You sound really desperate. The thing to do at a time like this is to try to generate some hope that things will get better and that this will pass.

As for the hospital, I am not an advocate of hospitalization for suicide attempts, because there is absolutely no evidence that it helps. In fact, I think in some cases it can harm because it does not teach you to cope in your everyday environment. So, I agree that the hospital is probably not the answer. Please remember when you are acutely miserable, things will get better. No emotion lasts for a long time. It always peaks and then dissipates like a wave. Hang in there.

bleedingpink: I started cutting last year. It got really bad to the point where I was cutting thirty times a night. I was able to stop for seven months. Then, one day I found out my best friend was cutting again, and it made me start cutting again. Why is that?

Dr. Reynolds: It is very common that talking to another who cuts, or talking about cutting, is a trigger for people to cut. I would urge you to not talk to her about this, and be sure that you have friends who cope in more adaptive ways.

betty654: I have been in DBT for almost a year now and have not cut. The thoughts are worse than ever and I feel worse than before. Will the thoughts ever go away and how long?

Dr. Reynolds: It is wonderful that you have not cut! You're obviously working hard toward building a life worth living. It is no surprise that the thoughts are still there. I assume that you mean thoughts or urges to cut and misery? The bad news is, that the misery and urges take longer to go away than just the cutting itself. The good news is that you will get there, it just takes a lot of work, and some radical acceptance that you may not be the kind of person that will ever be light-hearted and happy-go-lucky. Good luck betty654.