Depression is common in people who self-injure
Juliet is suffering silently from
self-injury syndrome, something
that most sufferers suffer alone, and in shame. While some experts have
seen self-injury as similar to
suicide, just stopping short of it, most
see self-injury as a distinct entity. Why do people, and especially
women and young women, engage in such activities ranging from hairpulling and cutting one's self to much more severe forms of self
mutilation?
For those of us who don't engage in this kind of activity it seems
bizarre bordering on crazy. The fact is, most people who self-injure are
not "crazy" but they often do suffer from psychological problems.
Depression is common in people who self-injure. People who self-injure
have often suffered physical, emotional or sexual abuse as children.
So why is Juliet going to cut herself again? Self-abusers report
feeling calm and peaceful after a certain amount of injury. Many report
feeling little or no pain. Is she doing it for the attention that she
will get after injuring herself? Perhaps.
Some experts suggest that self-injurers pursue this activity as a way
of
escaping severe emotional pain. The physical pain they inflict upon
themselves allows them to escape, at least for awhile, the emotional
pain they are experiencing.
The feeling of control that some self-abusers experience can explain
in part, the motivation behind self-mutilation. Many self-abusers, like
Juliet, are perfectionists, demanding a lot of themselves.
Juliet's your friend-how do you help her? It's important to recognize
that people who self-injure themselves on a regular basis need to get
professional help. The first therapist you turn to is not always the
right one for you. If Juliet feels that Doug is not a good therapist for
her, it may pay to try a different one.
One of the things that both therapists and friends can help Juliet
with is letting her know that she is okay, even if she isn't perfect. It
sounds like she is setting up tremendously high standards for herself,
and ends up creating a lot of tension and self-induced pressure.
Learning how to let go a bit, relax, and unwind might be very helpful
for Juliet.
As Juliet's friend you could try to distract her when she begins to
talk about self-injuring. Go for a walk, or see a movie together. Often
the urge to self-injure will pass with time. But remember, you are not
her therapist, you are her friend.
If you have a child that self-injures it is imperative to consult
with a mental health professional, both to get a better understanding of
what is going on and to get some help for your child. This is one
symptom that cannot be overlooked, and shrugged off.
There are many
treatments available for self-mutilators, and their
families. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
Dr. Naomi Baum has been a child and family psychologist for the
past 15 years
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