The Heart Break of Romantic Relationship

In the past 3 or 4 months the Universe has led me to focus more and more of my attention on the area of Romantic Relationships.  This led to me scheduling a workshop and announcing on my web site that I would have some new articles ready by Valentines Day 1999.  I have had a great deal of trouble in writing those articles.  I have been talking about the issues and aspects of relationship dysfunction for many years but have not written very much about it (perhaps because until recently I hadn't been able to get past my own terror of intimacy.)  So I have an overabundance of things to say on the subject.  The problem has been trying to decide how many articles I was writing, what the focus of each was going to be, and how to communicate as clearly as possible about this issue.  It turns out that there is so much material that I may just be writing a book here.

Romantic Relationships may be the most powerful, meaningful, traumatic, painful, explosive, heart wrenching single topic for most people.  As I say on my flyer for my new workshop "Our hearts have been broken because we were taught to do the Dance of Love in a dysfunctional way/to the wrong music." 

Our hearts have been broken!  And then they were broken again.

If you can Truly own the pain in that statement - take some deep breaths, visualize breathing White Light into your heart chakra (which will break up and release some of the trapped grief energy) and say out loud, "My heart has been broken." - you will probably not only produce some tears but some sobs of emotional energy being released. If you cannot own, feel, and release some emotional pain energy in relating to the Truth of that statement, it could mean that you don't feel safe to be emotionally honest in this moment, or that you don't feel safe to be emotionally honest with yourself in regard to this topic.  It could be a sad commentary on how much you have had to shut down your heart, how closed off you have had to become to the emotional Truth of how painful being human in a dysfunctional, emotionally dishonest, Spiritually hostile, Love retarded cultural environment has been.

It is not your fault.  It is not your fault!  IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!

It is a set up.  We were set up. 

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The issue of how we are set up to fail to get our needs met in Romantic Relationships is so complex - multi-leveled, multi-faceted, and multi-dimensional - that instead of writing an individual, fully contained article here I am going to make this Web Page a collage of different facets of this issue - individual vignettes with quotes from my books and articles.  I am going to use some quotes from my Question and Answer pages also - the Q & A # at the end of the quote will be a link to the applicable page - any articles or columns cited will also be linked.

I am thinking of this web page as if it were a crystal with multiple facets.  Each facet reflects a little different perspective on the issue of Romantic Relationships.  I am going to limit this page to seven of these different but very much interrelated facets.

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