Appendix (4): Good Mood: The New Psychology of Overcoming Depression

Good Mood

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Good Mood:
The New Psychology
of Overcoming Depression

Chapter 14

cont.

Uninvited Thought Activating Event Self-Comparison Analysis Response

Let's try another example. I frequently criticize myself for conducting my professional life very unwisely. I'll say things to myself like "If you would only stick to one subject, and not keep moving to develop new ideas, you would increase the chances of acceptance of some big idea, and you'd make a bigger contribution that way." So I write that in column 1. In column 2, I write the usual precipitating event. And in column 3, I write who I am comparing myself with, those people who do not leap from one subject to another.

Now I analyze the situation. I realize that there is an important benefit, too, in my not sticking to one subject. If I had stuck to one thing from the beginning, I would have stuck to one of my first two subjects, neither of which was as important or interesting as several things I have worked on since then. And at least two of the subjects that I have worked on have produced positive results beyond my wildest dreams. Therefore, it makes sense for me to accept the bad with the good, and realize that my "vice" of following after new ideas has its virtues, as the French would say, and the good outweighs the bad. It makes sense, then, not to focus on this dimension and make myself unhappy with it. Instead I might focus on the success of some of the things that I have done, or upon the fact that my family is healthy and in good shape, or that (aside from controversial political issues) the world is now in better conditions than ever before in history.

Building habits and behavioral feedback patterns offers help in keeping you focused on appropriate dimensions. Imagine that a friend could read your mind, and every time you were dwelling on a rotten dimension, the friend would jab you in the ribs and say "Change that ratio" or "Count your blessings". That assistance would be useful.

The trick is to act like that friend. And indeed, you can read your own mind. The problem is to build the habit of changing it when a rotten dimension comes into your mind. The solution is to "chain" the change-it habit to some cue that can remind you to do so. For example, as I mentioned earlier, my stomach often gets tight when I have a neg-comp in mind. I have trained myself that as soon as I feel my stomach tighten, I force myself to smile and to breathe deeply. And when I get on myself about something I did not do well, and say "You silly shit", I put into action the habit I have built of adding "Now that's damn ridiculous". Computers use a device called an "interrupt" to break into the current program in order to change what the computer is doing. The trick is to build an interrupt into ever "program" in your mind that plays out a Rotten Ratio, and chain to the interrupt an instruction to play out a program with a Rosy Ratio. Another example from my experience: Fact 1: Thanksgiving is the favorite holiday in my family; Rita, the kids, and I all enjoy it greatly. Fact 2: I heard a young woman remark about writing her parents at Thanksgiving because she could not get home. I immediately felt the jab of pain from a negative emotion, accompanied by the thought of a stack of letters that I had wanted to get out at Thanksgiving but are still delayed; the matter is annoying but not the least bit serious. When I felt the sadness, I half-consciously and half-automatically examined the uninvited thought. And my analysis led to the judgment that the unsent letters are unimportant, and instead I had better turn my mind to the wonderful family Thanksgiving we just had, and the Thanksgiving I could look forward to next year.

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The cause of the painful uninvited thoughts is not illogical thinking but rather a set of connections within my brain that habitually lead first to neg-comps rather than to happy thoughts. This means that someone like me must rewire these connections, that is, create a new set of habits. No single insight about the past or present can do this job. Rather, it requires sustained work. But if you at least recognize the nature of the problem, the problem is not insuperable, and you may even get satisfaction at the workmanship and imagination that you evince in your rewiring job.

The bad news is that at first you do not have a set of habits to switch you from Rotten to Rosy Ratios; if you did have them, you would not be depressed. The good news is that the more you work on these habits, and the longer you have them, the more effective they are, and the better they protect you from sadness and depression.

Summary

The best anti-depression strategy may be to replace the entire Rotten Ratio with another one - that is, to turn away from that entire dimension of comparison. There are two related sets of tactics for changing the dimension: a) changing your priorities about the various aspects of your life, and b) focusing your attention on the good things in your life rather than the bad things. Both tactics call upon our capacity to direct our attention toward some dimensions of our lives and away from others.

The device of "counting your blessings" constitutes shifting to a more positive dimension for self-comparison. Instead of brooding on lack of job success, you make yourself remember your family's good health. When you lose your money in the stock market, you try to keep in mind your wonderful children. Re-arranging your priorities is a second device for changing Mood Ratio dimensions. A frequent and important example is the person whose actual occupational achievements do not measure up to the person's aspirations, yet is unwilling to scale down his or her aspirations so as to keep the denominator from dominating the numerator. The person may then prevent negative self- comparisons by focusing attention on another related ratio-- perhaps the person's courage in persisting against obstacles, or the person's success in helping co-workers achieve important successes in their work. Depressives tend to be less flexible than are other people in altering the dimensions on which they compare themselves. But it is possible to change your ratios of comparison by effort and will. Behavior you wish to change Focusing on a dimension which a) you need not attribute importance to, and b) does not reflect well upon you.

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