sexual health
Making Peace with Your Sexuality
by Patricia Diane
Cota-RoblesSexuality is a beautiful expression of love. It is an intimate, sacred
communion between two people. When experienced with an open heart, it can
transcend the limitation of physical reality and allow one to soar into the
octaves of ecstasy, wonder and awe; it can fill our very being with peace and
contentment and it can expand our capacity to Love.
However,
for eons of time, sex has been used to manipulate, dominate, oppress and
control people. It has fallen to the depths of abuse and degradation. As this
condition developed, the religions of the world began to distance themselves
from this physical experience. In order to encourage their followers to do the
same, they initiated all kinds of taboos regarding sex. They took vows of
celibacy and proclaimed chastity a virtue. This created quite a quandary. Each
soul knew and understood that through the sacred communion of sex, one of the
most miraculous events on Earth occurs, which is the procreation of life. Yet,
on the other hand, we were being told by religious leaders that sex was bad.
These two diametrically opposed concepts could not be effectively
reconciled in our finite minds, so we learned to muddle through life
vacillating between wanting very much to fulfill our sexual experience and
beating ourselves up with guilt and shame if we did. This was a coup de
grace for our human ego, because our confusion created a very powerful
vehicle through which our human ego could manipulate us and keep us bound in
self abuse.
However,
if we are in the process of physically ascending into the fourth dimension, we
cannot just deny part of who we are and pretend it doesn't exist. We also can't
eliminate our sexuality by transmuting it into light so it will go away. Our
sexuality is part of who we are, and instead of getting rid of it, we need to
make peace with it and we need to learn how to express it positively and
constructively. We need to recognize it for what it was intended to be an
expression of Love. And, we
need to love ourselves
enough so that we will allow wonderful relationships into our life through
which our sexuality can be experienced in its highest level of
potential'
Loving Your Body
The
first step in awakening to the Divine Intent of our sexuality is learning to
love and actually revere our physical body. This vehicle is a miraculous living
organism that allows us the opportunity to experience a third dimensional
reality. It is the vehicle that is used to project the creative faculties of
thought and feeling into the physical plane. Without a physical body we could
not become co-creators with God or masters of energy, vibration and
consciousness in a physical reality. The physical body is not who we are; it is
merely the vehicle we "drive" while we are in embodiment on Earth. We
are responsible for how we treat our bodies and, just like our car, the better
we take care of it, the better it will serve us.
We have
created our physical body, and it is providing us with the exact learning
experiences we need. To hate our body just delays our progress and perpetuates
our misery. What we need to do is learn to Love it and respect it as the
beautiful, miraculous organism it Is.
When you
bathe your body feel your hands projecting healing and Love into every single
cell. As you rub your hands over your body with soap and water, caress every
part of your body with tenderness and Love. Get to know this vehicle as it
begins to come alive again and as you allow it to feel and express itself
without guilt or shame.
Your
body is sensitive and sensual for a reason. The pleasurable feelings you
experience when your body is Loved and caressed allow you to feel nurtured, and
it encourages you to open the Stargate of your Heart. The beautiful sensations
that flow through your body when it is Lovingly touched and caressed trigger
chemical changes in the body that enable you to receive and assimilate greater
quantities of life force. This increased life force rejuvenates the body and
keeps it vibrant and young. It accelerates healing and eliminates the
degenerative diseases of aging, which are created by closing down the Heart
Center and blocking the flow of life force. The added life force also heals the
grief and pain of lost Love, rejection, abandonment, loneliness and despair. It
lifts one out of depression and into a sense of well being and inner
peace.
Opening
up your feeling nature through the physical sensations of gentle, Loving touch
creates within your body a sense of trust, security and safety. As you Love
your body and increase the flow of God's Love in, through and around you, you
begin to truly know that God is the source of your Love, constantly filling you
up with the Holy Essence of Divine Love. This inner knowing will enable you to
understand that as long as you are open and receptive to this connection with
God's Love and the Love of your body, no one outside of you can take Love away
from you.
Because
of the taboos that have been inflicted upon us, often the thought of touching
our body in a pleasurable way seems shocking, but you must recognize that
belief is coming from the old patterns of self-deprivation, flagellation and
denial.
Sex Is The Experience
We have
often allowed ourselves to feel Love emotionally, but sex is the way we feel
and experience Love physically. When you begin to allow your body to awaken to
physical sensations with the healing Loving caress of your own touch, you will
feel safe and trusting. In truth, there is no way you can fully open
yourself.
I will
assume that you have magnetized into your life a wonderful, nurturing, caring
person with whom you want to Lovingly share your sexuality. The person you
choose for this very sacred sharing is, of course, your choice. No one outside
of you has the right to make that decision for you. No one knows what your life
path involves or what learning experiences you have agreed to go through. If
both people are adults and the decision to be intimately involved with each
other is a mutually Loving and positive agreement, then that is all that
matters. It is nobody else's business.
Once you
have chosen someone that you would like to have a relationship with, you must
remember that sex is intended to be an expression of Love, a
deep, intimate sharing, a
sacred communion. This means that it is very important for you and your partner
to continually be aware of each other throughout your sexual interaction. You
must communicate to each other your needs and your feelings, and express to
each other your enjoyment and pleasure. Whatever the two of you choose to
experience is your business, as long as you both are in agreement and are
interacting with Love, respect and reverence for your physical bodies and each
other.
Sexuality is about honoring and Loving yourself, your body, your
partner and your partner's body. It is about self-discovery in relationship to
your body and your partner. Just as you had to take time to learn to become
comfortable while Loving and caressing your own body, you need to be patient
and tolerant with both yourself and your partner as you learn to feel safe and
comfortable touching and caressing each other's body. But, I promise you, the
rewards will be well worth the effort.
Sex, the most fearful and fascinating, the most
guilt ridden and ecstatic of arts, is a subject we do not discuss easily.
Here's how to open up, sexually.
Last updated: 8/05
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