Multiple Personalities vs. Inner Child

last substantial update 8/1/97

I'm no expert, all I can do is tell you how I decided that I was multiple. I decided by a very simple definition: if the cut-off parts of myself feel like "not me," then I am multiple.

I decided that I didn't care about screening tests and official definitions (and I found a therapist who doesn't care either). If what you really want is a screening test, you can find one at: Dissociative Experiences Scale, though it isn't designed for amateur use. More useful for self-screening is a Dissociative Disorders Screening Test. If you want a definition and explanation of DID that reflects current research and practice see Sidran Foundation Disociative Identity Disorder Brochure. The Sidran Foundation also provides an extensive glossary if you need explanations of technical terms. Another good source of information is The Spectrum of Dissociative Disorders: An Overview of Diagnosis and Treatment by Joan A. Turkus, M.D.

There certainly isn't a fixed dividing line between inner-child work and multiple personalities. Different people and different therapists will draw the line in different places on the spectrum. If you don't want to worry about where you fall on the spectrum, you certainly don't have to. Do inner-child work and see what happens. There isn't much difference between inner-child work and healing multiple personalities, so you will be on the right track whatever may develop.

My current therapist, who is somewhat of an expert on multiples, told me once not to worry about the line, but for awhile it seemed very important to me. I believe that, for me, multiple personalities is a useful concept for healing, even though I am not an extreme case (I don't have clothing in my closet that I don't recognize, and I have never woken up in a strange bed and not known where I was or how I got there).

What made me decide that I was multiple was when a little girl spoke out of my mouth in therapy, and I realized afterwards that I remembered that she had spoken, but I didn't remember what she said. My then-therapist didn't want to make a big deal of it, but it really shook me up. (For more of the story see Being Multiple . At that point, I decided on my own dividing line. If the voices inside me felt like "not me," then I was multiple, whether or not they ever spoke to the outside world (as the official definition requires). If I have parts of myself that are so cut-off that they feel like not me, then the first step in healing them is going to be getting to know them and giving them the right to exist.

Please understand that this is only what I have figured out for myself, not expert knowledge of any sort. My categories don't even come from my therapist. As a Jungian, he is not big on putting labels on things. Also, you should be aware that some therapists believe that it is better for someone like me to concentrate on functioning in the world, instead of deciding that I have multiple personalities (which I have successfully hidden from the rest of the world up to this point) and expressing childlike needs. I disagree! I believe that the way I have coped, up to this point, is based on hating and denying and shutting away some wounded parts of myself. The only way to heal the vague pain that I have always felt inside myself is to get to know and honor and validate those parts of myself that I previously cut-off to such an extent that they don't feel like part of me; and to hear the memories they have and I don't.

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