Triumphant
Journey:
A Cyberguide To Stop Overeating and
Recover from Eating Disorders
When a child's identity, worth in body, mind, soul and
imagination, are disregarded or trampled, the bewildering emotional pain is too
much for most children to bear. Because they are children, they have no
criteria for behavior, no comparison, no frame of reference. They believe that
this is the way the world is. And, of course, this is the way their world is.
They will accept as true and valid the destructive messages pouring into them
and struggle to find a way to survive their pain.
Some methods of destroying a child's worth are:
- To belittle a child's thinking.
- To disparage a child's natural desires and behaviors.
- To neglect or isolate a child.
- To break promises.
- To tell fantasies as if they were true.
- To tease unrelentingly.
- To not believe a child who says friends, teachers,
neighbors or strangers are harassing her or him.
- To punish a child for telling his or her experience
and/or telling the child his or her experience did not happen.
Today sensational, exaggerated language is often used in
advertising, news and conversation to make an emotional point.
In the context of an assaulted child's experience, the
roots of inner secrets are genuinely intolerable. Intolerable means truly
unendurable. The child cannot stay alive and sane and experience what is
intolerable.
When stress, pain, horror, confusion, bewilderment and
fear are both intolerable and inescapable there are usually two choices. The
situation must end or the child must die or go insane.
The creative child finds a third choice. The child who
will survive blocks awareness. Intolerable information becomes a well-guarded
secret.
The secret is guarded until the child is strong enough,
mature enough, has enough support and information, to retrieve his lost
experience and live a more full life.
If you are an overeater, the darkness and compulsive
behaviors around your inner secrets are the devices that have saved your life.
It takes a lot of trust and courage to know that you can survive without them.
When you rally your trust and courage to begin to explore your own darkness you
embark on the next phase of your triumphant journey.
end of part 4
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