Eating
Disorders
The Isolation of an Eating Disorder
by Kari Wolfe, MS, CPC, Program Director,
Remuda Ranch Programs for Anorexia and Bulimia
Isolation often accompanies eating disorders, growing in importance as the
disorder progresses. Both adults and adolescents with eating disorders evidence
a need to isolate. Adolescents often stop all socializing with peers. But they
must usually be accountable to parents and therefore cannot completely separate
from the world. Adults, especially when unmarried, may isolate from everyone.
This need to isolate may result from common adjunct disorders such as
anxiety, panic, or obsessive-compulsive disorder. People with these disorders
experience discomfort in social situations and may opt for solitude. Other
women may elect to isolate due to interpersonal difficulties such as social
phobia, problems relating, or conflict. Yet the primary reason that women with
eating disorders choose isolation is to practice their eating disorder without
interruption. Eating disorders become the person's primary focus and interest,
and relationships fade into the background.
Those with anorexia often isolate as their disorder becomes visually
apparent, avoiding social interaction because it no longer garners positive
feedback. In the early stages, the woman often receives positive comments about
her weight loss and thin appearance. At some point, comments turn negative,
with friends, relatives, and colleagues telling her she must eat more and that
her dieting has gone too far. Because of her need to protect her eating
disorder, these words are unwelcome. She also avoids social gatherings because
they often involve food, which she will not eat. Instead, the woman with
anorexia wants and needs time to practice the eating disorder, with its variety
of rules, guidelines, and elaborate food rituals. The process she must go
through to prepare and consume food may take hours. This could involve
over-cooking food, adding many condiments, or displaying food in an unappealing
or unattractive fashion--anything to guarantee the food's undesirability to
ensure that she will not overeat. These games which she plays with her mind
must be done privately. In addition, the longer she is in the disorder, the
fewer foods she will allow herself to eat. These various food rituals and
behaviors make complete sense to her, but because they are so unusual and
focused, they exclude other people.
By definition, bulimia requires a great deal of time alone. This time is
spent acquiring tremendous quantities of food, ingesting it, purging it through
vomiting or exercise, and then getting rid of the evidence, such as wrappers,
food containers, and bags. Frequently, steps must be taken to replace the
missing food. Each of these steps may be highly ritualized. These behaviors
also engender intense feelings of guilt and shame. Remaining alone ensures that
these activities of which she is ashamed will remain secret. Women with bulimia
may also avoid people due to negative social commentary. Since these women tend
to fall in the average to above-average weight range, they are often criticized
for being overweight.
Though time alone is easier to achieve for single women, even married women
and mothers find creative ways to get the time they need. Some work longer
hours to avoid family meals, while others opt to work nights or swing shifts in
order to guarantee that when they are home they are alone. Some women with
eating disorders choose to be homemakers, giving them the opportunity to
practice their eating disorder throughout the day when husband and children are
away at work and school. In extreme cases, the illness may become so dominant
that a woman will neglect her children in order to be alone and practice her
eating disorder.
Clearly, isolation promotes the eating disorder and is often a necessary
component thereof. Alone in the world of her eating disorder, a woman may be
consumed by obsessive thoughts about food and calories, weight and fat grams,
exercise and self-hatred. Nothing remains to divert her misplaced attention. An
odd, distorted solipsism (a theory holding that the self can know nothing but
its own modifications and that the self is the only existent thing) results.
Professionals specializing in eating disorders can be located by
contacting
Remuda Ranch Programs for Anorexia and Bulimia at
1-800-445-1900.
This article is part of a continuing series of monthly columns. To be
notified of updates, please sign up for the
HealthyPlace.com Eating Disorders Community Newsletter.
Other column's include:
Concerned about whether you might have eating
disordered behaviors?
Take the Eating
Attitudes Test.
back to top |
send page to
friend | home
|
