Suggestions and Tips for Anxiety Disorders

The Caregiver

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SUGGESTIONS AND TIPS

Anxiety Disorders - The Caregiver

For legal reasons I should start each sentence with, "in my nonprofessional opinion," or " I have been advised that," or "It is my understanding that..." But to do so would make the section awkward and confusing to the reader. So I have set the section up in, I hope, an easy to read format. You can mentally supply the caveats after reading this official disclaimer.

As you have read under General Description of Anxiety and Panic Attacks being a Support Person is something which you cannot take lightly. The ill person has turned to you to be his or her life-line in returning to a "normal" world. Love and sincerity play an essential role, but in addition you must understand what you are doing and why. If, therefore, you have not yet read the descriptions of a panic attack and agoraphobia found on this site, do so soon.

Remember, there are various schools of thought on being a support person. I am giving you what I have heard and found to be most helpful to the people with whom I have worked among on being a support person.

To help you understand why I like this approach, I am going to give you a brief true story of a person I will call Anne.

Anne developed panic attacks about 12 years ago, before PA's were more widely known and a variety of treatments became available.

For several years, she looked for a diagnosis and effective help. Eventually both were forthcoming but in the interim she developed severe depression and agoraphobia to the point where she could not leave the house without tranquilizers and a caregiver. Even then, there were times she had to come home without accomplishing her goal, and the failure led to greater depression and more anxiety.

About three years ago, came a change in her thought patterns. Anne realised that by setting a specific location or a specific accomplishment as a goal, she was constantly setting herself up for possible failure. There is a world of difference between "I am going for a walk" and "I am going to try to go to the store."

In the first, the goal is to go for a walk. It may be to the property line or 12 blocks and back; Anne does as much as she feels comfortable doing. In the second case, Anne has to make it to the store or she will have failed. The same is true of any such project. Why make a big thing out of trying to drive to the store when you can be more relaxed just going for a drive and doing whatever you feel comfortable doing? Turn right. Turn left. Come home. Keep going. It doesn't matter. Allowing yourself freedom of choice without feeling pressured or guilty is the key.

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After a few weeks, Anne found she was driving greater distances and eventually could set off for a specific location, knowing she had been there before while on her no-pressure drives. She can now drive virtually anywhere. Stoplights and inner lanes are still a bit of a problem, but not enough to force her to use alternate routes.

A number of authors have come to see the effectiveness of this strategy and have referred to it as "giving yourself permission."

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